Heya, Eros. Casanova here for another review.

So what I've grasped so far in this chapter is that she thinks there's a blood sucking bat making her cut herself and stuff, and she's not completely there. Okay, so I got that. One thing you mentioned, however, is that Tamao is in college(first chapter you mentioned this) and yet here he has to get permission from his parents to go spend the night with her? That doesn't make much sense, neither does the lunch eating and stuff all together, so I think I might have read too much into the college comment. Anyway, onward.

You're strictly focusing on Michiko being sorta off the rails, here, and have since chapter two. I would enjoy seeing her be more than that, give more into her day to day life instead of just freaking out. Instead of just being angry and depressed, I would love to see something more.

And Tamao doesn't seem to react much to any of this- which I can see to an extent, but not to this extent. He doesn't even flinch at any of this, and yet I figure someone who has depraved himself of human connections would at least be a little freaked out.

Anyway i think that's all I have to say on this one and I hope it helped.

Keep on doing what you're doing.

Sincerely, Casanova

This is Weirdo, here for a review. Please know that nothing in this review is meant to offend you or your story. This is just my opinion, you and other readers and reviewers could disagree. That being said, let us get into this review.

Grammar/Typos/Word check/Spell check/Sentence formation

Tamao walked through the garden, quivering with cold breeze that was brushing against his cheeks. He was wrapped in a long brown coat and a white muffler that clinged to his neck because of the air acting in opposition.

"Tell me, Michiko what is the matter? I have been observing your daily struggle... Do you have any problems with your feelings?"

"Rattoo. Did it..." Michiko began to sob.

"Rattoo, the blood sucking bat."

Tamao was left thinking how can a blood sucking bat reside in their country and out of curiosity he decided to stay with her that night. He took permission from his parents and told Michiko that he would stay with her that night.

Till the sun set she was gloomy. After the sun set there was a drastic change in her mood.

Hello there, Eros!

I have not read any previous chapters of this novel, so all I know about this story is what I've read here. And as of right now, I find it quite fascinating, to be honest! I don't know the relationship between Tamao and Michiko but it seems pretty tight. They appear to be good friends, and I like Tamao based off of how he's treating Michiko: trying to comfort her, help her see clearly, etc.

This chapter ended a bit intensely (which was awesome haha) and it leaves me wondering about Michiko's state of mind. If this blood-sucking bat was a figment of her imagination and she's wounding herself over here... that's concerning. But tbh it makes for a great story. And that's exciting. :]

One thing that made this chapter difficult to read was the grammatical and punctuation errors scattered throughout it. There were unnecessary commas (or none at all), wrong tenses, and awkwardly worded sentences. I'm also not sure why you highlighted all the dialogue in bold but that's really not necessary and would read better without it. But since I don't want to spend too long on here going over everything I'll just point you to this awesome page that could definitely help improve your works. (Though I will warn you: a person can spend far too long looking through these columns lol).

Michiko had just finished making cookies and was swinging on the swing, when she saw Tamao walking through the garden. She got up from the swing and welcomed him into her house.

Michiko shook her head and looked down, trying to avoid eye contact with Tamao.

"Tamao, I don't know what is happening to me. I feel there's chemical turmoil going on my head. I feel I have lost my control over feelings."

"Since when has it been happening?"

"About ... five months."

He took permission from his parents and told Michiko that he would stay with her that night.

Michiko cooked dinner for both of them and the whole time, Tamao was trying hard to change her mood and make her come back from depression. Michiko was facing extreme mood swings that night. Till the sun set she was gloomy. After the sun set there was a drastic change in her mood.