Young Writers Society

Hello, there! Okay, so this is DEFINITELY not the sort of thing I normally review. I'm just going to point out three things about this:

1. "And she loved to sniff poo!" The number of syllables doesn't work with the rest of the poem. Also, it's just plain weird. (And I mean that in the nicest possible way.)

2. "Once, a woman was blue." Can you phrase this in a better way?

3. Maybe consider not capitalizing every line? It makes the poem kind of... um... clunky. :/

Anyway, great job! I laughed out loud while I read this--the absurdness makes it really funny. One thing--why is this Lyrical, Fantasy. It should be Humor, right? Your choice.

Keep on writing... and I'll keep on laughing!

Yours in jest,

IronSpark

Wow. I don't even know what I should think about this. This should be filed under comedy, it's that funny. I'm sure if you wrote this seriously or just for fun, so I'm not going to review it seriously. I like the mention of Smurfs, the last three lines fit together really well and the beat is spot on. My only nit pick is the line about poo- it doesn't fit in with everything else. I've put all the one syllable 'oo' words below for you to make a different line with...