hmmm... look what I did...
I like the poem... wish you didn't have to write it though.
who do you think i am?
i dont judge
not you, not anyone
i dont play games
not with love
i dont gamble
not with our friendship
i dont drink
unless im drowning in my emotions
who do you think you are?
judging me
and guessing my motives
toying with me
loving me like a brother
yet hating me like your nemesis
gambling with my life
and destroying our friendhsip
giving me a taste, just a sip
of what you truly think of me
who am i?
a friend?
a foe?
both?
who are you?
my brother.
my friend.
a traitor?
This is to you, Artist.
hmmm... look what I did...
I like the poem... wish you didn't have to write it though.
I know how much you hate for people to get the wrong idea, so I'll draw attention to this:
"i dont drink
unless im drowning in my emotions"
I'm assuming you're referring to the gulping-drink of drowning: that is, swallowing your emotions. But this sound like the plea of an alcoholic. "I only drink when I have to".
I like you line breaks and the drive of your rhythm.
I'm sorry for the subject matter.
Great first stanza, loses it after that. Don't like the questions at the end. Second stanza isn't bad but could do with some rewording. Nice first draft in other words. Just play around with it.
120,212 Literary Works • 649,111 Reviews
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