Welcome to the world of comforting each other with cactus,
You Moron , That's the friendship !
From eating into same plate to enjoying our singlehood
together
From Eating bombay sandwich to being the reason of my first
lie of my life .
From breaking the ice by 2 am conversation to now all fake
layers of conversation
cheers !
Unspoken words heard more than the spoken one , As they
have tendency to scream inside your brain .
Sad! I feel blinds are luckier than the deaf .
When i listened Your unspoken words by my spot in your life
you were going far away from me
It didn't hurt me because it was only the first thing
All i afraid of its climax.
Now, my part of unspoken words !
I was unable to tell you it hurt me alot.
My bad , My weakness !!
Now There you can see the beauty of unspoken words
The beauty of it ?!
But now i dont want to be emotional fool.
P.S. Please don't be my friend ,
hey, Please don't be my enemy
Be the stranger with best memories .
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
125,005 Literary Works • 672,798 Reviews
Hi, Shikora here with a review for you on this wonderful day.
let's jump right into it shall we.
Now this is a really cool poem you have here. But I did see a few things that need to be fixed but I'll get to that in a moment.
I really like the name to this poem, it was very interesting and it drew me in right away, another really cool this is that the first sentence got my attention and made me want to keep on reading, and that's a really good thing, you want to have that power over your readers, you want to make them keep reading until the end.
But I did see somethings that need to be fixed like I said earlier. So let's get to it.
The first thing is that I think you should put some punctuation in after every sentence, I read through you poem a few times and it sounds a lot better that way. Let me show you what I mean.
This would sound a lot better if you put a fall stop at the end, then it wont sound like its running into the next sentence.
Now about the word in bold it's just a small spelling mistake you spell it like this, single hood.
Now the next thing I saw was that when you do put punctuation in after your sentences, it's like you've pressed the space par key then you put your comma in or something. Let me show you what you have done.
You have done it twice in this sentence. You poem would look a lot better if you fixed that.
But other then that, I really liked reading your poem, and reviewing it too. I hope to see more of your works on YWS soon so I may pop in again and give you a review. Never stop writing and have a great day/night.
Your friend
Shikora.
Oh and happy review day!
Thank you so much . Have a nice day .
Your welcome.
Hi there @Drkinjal I am here to do a review on your poem. grate length bye the way.
What I like most about this
I really liked how you started this of, I feel like there is a lot of bonding here in this poem, friends you no, also talking about that I feel like you do say friends a lot in this, I feel like you have wisdom for writing things, it was lovely reading this peace of work here, I acsholy really like this for I feel like it is friendly, I feel like you or really good at writing poems, like this one, I don't really see any thing wrong here, So nice poem, I loved reading this, I feel like you could make this in to a song some how if you rote it a bit differently then I would really like it, I do like this, there seams to be nothing here that i can really review so, so that is all that i can say so keep up the grate poem writing it seems like it is your stong point.
@EagleFly out to seek and kill
Happy review day.
Thank you so much i am glad you like it