I agree with this poem! I honestly don't see anything wrong with it, except that it could have more, because it's so short.
It's a very cute poem!
z
An eternal dread of loneliness,
I feel as if I am nothing,
So I act as if I am something,
I may talk, try to give myself a voice,
but my true nature remains hidden,
for I am terrified of being an annoyance,
and I am scared to be alone.
I agree with this poem! I honestly don't see anything wrong with it, except that it could have more, because it's so short.
It's a very cute poem!
Hi there, Mem here to review your poem, Happy review day.
First thing I noted when reading through this is the lack of imagery. That's really important for conveying something like this. The overuse of the word I takes away from the emotions and feelings that I can sense are there but aren't really.You could probably add imagery and make this longer and therefore an all together better poem, but everyone has their own reasons for writing the way they do. Another thing I wanted to touch down on is the lack of formatting, I don't know if you intended on this looking the way it does but the link below should help somewhat with fixing YWS formatting.
How to Format Poetry
Those are some helpful tips to help you with YWS formatting
Hope this helps
~Mem
Hi,
I don't want to comment much on this poem, but as if with every poems, they can be improved and keep improving. I still love to read this kind of theme, so here's my review.
(I'm sorry, I wrote this review like I've broken some leg or something. I'm just tired after writing more than 10 reviews in a day, forgive me if I miss something.)
***
I can see that the title is misspelled, but I don't think you do this not without purpose, but whatever you want to tell me with that title, I don't get what you mean by "lonliness". If I missed some puns or reference, I would love hearing them out.
All of your ideas make sense. All of them are quite true. Your poem is honest and short, so it's a cute poem actually. But if you feel that poem is just random thoughts like that being put into a cage named "poem", try to explore the fantastic world of poetry. Poetry is very interesting world.
Back to the poem, I love the usage of the word "dread". It's one of my favorite word and it's has a nice fit with this poem.
Actually, the only thing I want to say to you is just use more descriptions. Be more authentic. I would love seeing topics like this being twisted in a beautiful way. You can do it, I think.
**
So that's all for your poem. If you feel poem as a medium for you to express your feelings, then it is actually a good thing. I often do thing like that. But learning to write in a more accurate way will definitely make you feel good.
Keep writing.
~memo
What's up?! I just wanted to say that it is very nice poem, and it suits my personality awesomely (probably why I love it so much). It's short and sweet, and though it isn't very long, and it doesn't have the "big fancy words" that some poems have, I enjoy it, It still hits the emotions, and for me, that's what I strive for when it comes to poetry, not the length or how detailed it is (wow...my mind is in the gutter with that last part I said). Thank you for the good read!
Hello!
I'm new to this website, but I can tell that it's awesome. And you're poem is awesome as well! I think it needs just a tiny bit more work. Maybe an extra description or something. I like the part where you wrote "So I act as if I am something" because this applies to lots of teens right now in the world. Maybe your next poem can be about being yourself. I bet it would be amazing as well.
Squirtlepowiee
Hello!
I'm new to this website, but I can tell that it's awesome. And you're poem is awesome as well! I think it needs just a tiny bit more work. Maybe an extra description or something. I like the part where you wrote "So I act as if I am something" because this applies to lots of teens right now in the world. Maybe your next poem can be about being yourself. I bet it would be amazing as well.
Squirtlepowiee
Points: 9818
Reviews: 16
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