Hey! This is kind of rough, tell me what you all think!
Vrs 1
you never told me that you love me
you never asked me for my name
but when our eyes met it was magic
well, baby, two can play this game
Chorus:
the way you move
the way you touch
the way you kiss me oh so much
the way you whisper in my ear
the way I scream but you can't hear
Vrs 2
It wasn't meant last forever
not even through this dizzy night
but I will love you like a diamond
filled with darkness in this night
Chorus:
the way you move
the way you touch
the way you kiss me oh so much
the way you whisper in my ear
the way I scream but you can't hear
the way I feel you when you lie
it makes me want to, want to die
Vrs 3:
it's perfect when come together
and tumble down onto the floor
but you're just waiting for the right time
to make it, make it out the door
Chorus:
the way you move
the way you touch
the way you kiss me oh so much
the way you whisper in my ear
the way I scream but you can't hear
the way I feel you when you lie
it makes me want to, want to die
Vrs4
you left me bleeding in the darkness
so broken there's no chance to heal
it's like you just needed a body
something warm that you could feel
Chorus:
the way you move
the way you touch
the way you kiss me oh so much
the way you whisper in my ear
the way I scream but you can't hear
the way I feel you when you lie
it makes me want to, want to die
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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125,006 Literary Works • 672,809 Reviews
"the way you move
the way you touch
the way you kiss me oh so much
the way you whisper in my ear
the way I scream but you can't hear"
I loved the last line! At first I assumed it would be a bit ordinary, some sort of love song...then it takes a turn that is oh, so pleasantly surprising. The hint of dark is just lovely
Overall I very much liked it, though (as tydecker777 said) I do have a bit of unfortunate schema that makes me shiver at the word "baby" when not directed at drooling infants
Thankfully, there was no cliche follow up to the "baby", which is what I enjoyed most. Your lyrics are very refreshing.
Thanks for writing
-Gwenavera
I really loved verse four. it's like you just needed a body something warm that you could feel. I really enjoy that.It's a great line. The one qualm I have with this is that you said baby. But that's just me, I've always had a thing with that word, haha. But I enjoyed it a lot and I think you describe what a lot of people have gone through or are going through right now. Keep it up =]
I really like these lyrics. It isn't one of those songs that just repeat the same things over and over again; it actually has a structure and meaning. Not to mention the fact that it's really catchy. (: