Warning: This work has been rated 18+ for language, violence, and mature content.
Kels consciousness returned, his eyesight blurry with pain. He was on the floor, the ground made of black stone covered in soot. The entire room smelt of decay, like a dungeon, with the slight scent of jam. Attempting to stumble to his feet, he noticed the iron chains around his leg, and the large cell he was locked into. Also, clad on his hands, two large metal rings seemed to be fused to his knuckles. They pulsed with magical incantation, burnt and freshly pressed into the flesh.
Inside the room he could see little except for a small pile of hay that smelt of human excrement, it was unpleasant and added to the decrepit smell of the place. He couldn’t see anything except for the flickering of a dark light in the distance. He was alone. Moving about the room, at least how much the room allowed him to, he found a slice of bread with jam on it. Gripping onto his stomach, Kel realized just how hungry he was, and stuffed it into his mouth with no care for its origin. The crumbs splattered messily across his clothes, now covered in a black musk of soot and other fluids. As the robes clenched around him, they felt wet like they were sprayed of water, or drenched in his own sweat. “Who has done this to me...” Kel wondered, pacing around the cell, waiting.
He was there for hours, days even, possibly. He had no idea how much time had passed, it felt like he was trapped there for eternity. He couldn’t even cast spells. When he tried to break out through the iron bars that kept him here, he was only met with a fizzling sound and small sparks of flames as the rings on his fingers glowed and pulsed. They seemed to be sucking up all his energy, his mana, he couldn’t do anything.
Several hours must have passed before Kel heard the shuffling of something coming towards him. Picking up the light, the only light Kel could see, the being moved closer to him, it’s face now illuminated. Standing there was Calvin, a devious look about him.
“Calvin, what have you done? Let me out this instant!” Kel demanded, still hating his situation.
Calvin only stared at him, chuckling madly at Kel. His pale skin somehow managed to become paler, looking almost like he was a ghost. His face looked...different. Black tubes rolled down his face, his veins bulging as he stood there. He looked like the recently deceased, his body mutating and letting go. Whoever it was, they looked almost like nothing of the Calvin of before, except for his bright, vibrant hair. Even now, the stench of death invaded his nose with renewed strength, the younger mage with emerald eyes radiating the foul smell.
Calvin opened the door, only for Kel to begin screaming in agony. His hands ruptured into flames, his bindings glowing red hot as they burnt the flesh on his wrists. Calvin yanked on the leg chains, wrapping them around the torch like a bludgeon. Kel could barely walk, the burning chains digging into his flesh further, but he had to, he had no choice.
Even as he stumbled forward, following Calvin down the dark and twisting hallways of whatever dungeon they were in, he found himself forced to stay awake. Even when the pain became unbearable, so much so that the average mage would long have passed out, his mind was crystal clear. “Calvin, let me go, I promise, if you do this, i’ll never mention this to anyone!” Kel cried, a whimper of pain escaping his lips as Calvin slammed the torch into his clothes.
“Silence!” Calvin shouted, the first thing he had said to him. Then, with a stronger tug than last time, he pulled him further into what Kel soon presumed would be his permanent catacomb. They continued to walk for what seemed to be the same eternity he experienced in the cell, like time didn’t matter here, almost like it warped beyond the normal scale of existence; he found himself unable to understand, to think on such things. His mind was screaming in agony, the burning cuffs now making his skin boil as they seemed to burn into the bone, but they continued to walk and stumble forward. At this point, Kel would be willing to give away anything. He just wanted this to end...
After a few more minutes of walking, the two arrived in a large, open courtyard. The scent of sweet flowers was a welcomed change from the deep and ever going smell of rotting flesh. Sitting in the middle of the courtyard, a large, destroyed statue lay wasted and fallen to the side. It held a blade, that was shattered into multiple pieces, and it’s face destroyed beyond repair. Kel had no idea who he was, nor did he truly care. Calvin, forcing him forward, quickly took all ideas of such things out of his mind.
He stumbled towards the statue, only for his body to feel like it had frozen. Like he had popped a bubble that lead to darkness, he was quickly swallowed by a large mass growing from the ground, pulling him further into the ground. He felt his bindings break, his rings burnt into his knuckles rupture, but, no relief came over him.
As he was pulled deeper in, he plopped down in a large circle...somewhere underground. He looked upwards, only see red splatters like blood against a black background. It didn’t seem possible, almost like the sky was moving. He thought that he might have been outside...but didn’t he just sink into the ground? Kels eyes came to the attention of his surroundings. Sitting around him, several people draped in black robes encircled him, a large barrier forming right before his eyes sealing him within the circle.
Calvin stepped forward from the darkness, his emerald eyes now plunged into a black abyss like someone had removed him. He looked changed...he looked like he was no longer human.
“Volentus, Shovala, Rotund.” The group of people whispered in chant, Calvin lightly placing his hand upon the glowing barrier that separated them. “Calm yourself, Kel, you are being used for a higher purpose! We will sacrifice you...for the greater good. When we convince this demon to give us great power, we can enact a new order, an order where magic is free, and we rule supreme!” Calvin said, obviously gone mad.
“Calvin, you don’t have to do this, you’ll just be damning yourself!” Kel claimed, slamming his fists upon the barrier parallel to Calvin. His fists were wanting to slam through the barrier and smash into the face of the mage, but could not.
“Stand still, this will go so much easier if you allow us to do this.” Calvin whispered, standing back. The group nodded in agreement, Calvin flipping open a grimoire that sat on a large pedestal in the darkness. He had no idea where he was, this was impossible!
“Oh great and powerful lord, the most powerful of demons, I have called to summon you and welcome you to our world, we are to embrace your power, take us into your womb! We offer sacrifice, sacrifice of greatness! Let us bask in your glory, Lord, let us cleanse this land of foolishness, let us destroy all who oppose us!” Calvin cried, speaking in a much deeper voice than usual, almost like a mature adult.
The ground underneath Kel swarmed with black water. His feet were covered in it in an instant. He couldn’t even move his feet. “Calvin, stop this madness!” Kel shouted in anger, his robes now slowly being covered in the liquid as it crawled up him.
“Lord! Please send us power, let us be great. we are your vassals, we are able to make what you wish to come true! Your wish is our command!” Calvin continued, the oozing liquid growing larger and thicker. It was reaching Kel’s throat. He felt like he was running out of time, and quick.
His hands raised above him, a sickening feeling as the liquid lapsed over his mouth. “Please. don’t do this...” Kel whimpered. His life flashed before him. He remembered being raised by Thal, his warm loving embrace when he picked him up for the first time...his time learning and studying and practicing magic. Would he truly lose these memories? Was he made for nothing more than to be sacrificed? Tears swelled in his eyes, tears of fear. “Please...don’t let this be my end.” Kel whispered, the goo finally swallowing him. Silence...he felt nothing as the liquid pressed around him. Nothing but fear washed over him, he himself feeling the ooze...but then a voice came to him.
“They are not worthy. They think that offering you to me, your master, would please me? Humans are so foolish. I knew I should’ve gifted the Vesh’na magic...at least they are loyal.” The deep voice chuckled. Kel was not sure where this sound was coming from...he could only hear it imposing itself over him. “I am offering you a proposition, Magi. Serve me, and I will save your pitiful life. Your forsaken one, the one you have long hated, but forced to live. Now, you die here, in this goo, for the sake of a foolish cult? Don’t you wish for more?” The voice asked. Kel felt a feeling of darkness coming from the voice, like it was born from evil.
“Of course, you could also be my next meal...i’ll just end up killing Calvin and his friends anyways. Daring to mess with things they don’t know is a common human folly.” The voice mocked.
Kel felt his skin burning, the goo now beginning to digest him. Could he dare make such an offer with this being? He did not know...but, as he thought, his mind changed to Thal, his teacher. No...he couldn’t die yet, if he did, he would be letting everyone down.
“I...I accept.” Kel whispered.
“Excellent.” the voice cackled malevolently. “You have entered a pack. Your name from now on...shall be Obrek. You’ve lost all rights to your previous identity, you are mine.”
A bright light shone around Kel, he felt his voice loosen as the goo around him shattered. He felt like he had renewed strength. He felt like he needed to kill.
“What?!” Calvin yelled. “Strengthen the barrier, he’s trying to esca-” Obrek slammed through the barrier, a mad look in his eyes as his hand clenched around the throat of Calvin. Foul human! Sick, disgusting filth! Your mother was a whore, you know, no wonder you’re so pathetic!” Obrek shouted, his mind leaving him, even his own name. Crushing the throat of Calvin in his hands, feeling the snapping sensation...he loved it.
Dropping the body, blood now covering his hands, Obrek looked to the remainder of the group as madness took over. “I will consume your flesh...your being, your soul. Let your hope be destroyed, I am supreme, I am powerful, I will obliterate your foul existence from this earth!” Obrek yelled, letting a mad laughter come from his maw. The group looked at him in fear, some of then getting up to fire a spell at him.
“Be sent back to oblivion!” Obrek called out, his hand extending as his hand blew a dark pulse of pure negative energy at a few of the mages. Their sickening screams as their flesh was peeled from the skeleton was riveting, he loved it...he wanted more. His heart was racing, this was all too much, but he couldn’t stop, he wanted more blood!
Grabbing the grimoire that was once used to sacrifice several people, he slammed it into the head of a nearby cultist, hitting him and over and over again. “Your essence will be my substinance!” Obrek cried, blood hurling onto his contorted face as he kicked the cultist. “Your juices are delicious, it’s like a crimson dream...” Obrek whispered. He turned around, his hand slamming into an advancing man wearing black. He stood tall...it was the same one who knocked him out. Kel didn’t bother flipping the hood over. Revenge was no longer needed, he just needed more death, more blood! His hand pierced into the tall man’s chest, it clenched around the heart, squeezing, feeling it. “Oh little heart, pulsing with life...” Obrek whispered, crushing it in his hands as a pouring of blood from the man’s mouth fell upon his head. “How euphoric.” Obrek whispered lovingly. He turned around, craving more...only to find no one.
His heart continued to pound, it pounded and pounded and pounded. He could feel it, it was alive, he was alive, he was blood, he had more! Obrek’s hand dug into his chest, his hand holding onto his heart. “More, I NEED more!” Obrek cried, ripping the heart from its place as he held it forward in front of him. He felt nothing...he couldn’t feel anything. Just the powerful feeling of death washing over him. “More...” Obrek whispered, his body collapsing to the floor.
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we are your vassals, we are able to make what you wish to come true! Your wish is our command!” Calvin continued,
I noticed this first off, you failed to capatalize We and you spelled vessels unless you were meaning to use vassals which is fine, it still make sense.
Kel didn’t bother flipping the hood over.
Here you used Kel instead of Obrek.
I really like how this story is going so far and I hope you write some more of it, you are lucky to get you works out of the green room, that means some people are interested, like me, there are some people who have like five or six chapters in the green room. I hope you keep writing.
Honestly, i like it. Reading chapters one and two. It really goes well with what you've wrote so far and the characters come together so well. If you're looking for 18+ ONLY to read it i think you've hit the jackpot with the novel but you also have to think, more kids around 14-17 read books more often than 18 year olds. With the mature content i'd say dial it down a notch. You want the reader to want more not be disgusted. What others have said on your chapter 1, to be cliche. I get that. I can see it in this. But i also see things that are very unique and interesting. I really like what you're writing. Keep it up!!

-Aaboo17