This is an exercise for anyone that is struggling with something, and can’t quite figure out how to explain how they feel.
Picture a box. A glass box. Your box can be any shape, size and design, as long as it is glass.
Do you have your box? Good. Now take your box, and throw it. Throw it against the wall or onto the floor. Let it smash, small piece and large pieces flying everywhere, the glass frame shattering.
Now look. Don’t say anything, just look at the broken pieces of glass on the floor. Ah! Don’t touch them, the shards will cut you, and it will hurt. You don’t want that, so just look.
This is a mess you won’t have to clean up, because look, the box is picking itself up. Sure it’s slow, and some pieces are dropped, but the box is slowly gathering itself. And instead of being put into the trash, the box is being melted down to create a new one. Look at that! Already there is a new shape forming. You can watch it be reshaped and remoulded, but don’t touch! If you touch the box, it may break. Let the box cool, and then it will be ready for the world.
That box is me, and the broken pieces are my life. I am slowly picking up the shards to melt them down and restart as a new, better box. I need to do this on my own, because though there will be times when I need help, this isn’t one of those times. I will heal myself at my own pace, because this is a delicate procedure and can’t be rushed, like all good things in life. So please understand that what I’m doing is for the best. I know I may have made some bad decisions in life, but so has everyone. It’s what makes us human. I’m healing myself from the mistakes other people have made.
And when I’m ready, when I am cool and dry and ready to face the world, you can put the box up on display for the world to see. But only when I’m ready. And when the waiting gets too much, just picture the glass box breaking, and then picking itself back up, and know that all great artworks take time.
**I used this to explain to my father why I’ve done what I’ve done. Unfortunately, he chose to ignore it. However, any one of you amazing people are allowed to use this metaphor if it will help you. And it doesn’t just have to be based on your life. You can use it to explain how you feel to a parent when they treat you unfairly, or your child if they keep misbehaving. You can say it to a friend that doesn’t quite understand how you feel, or even just for yourself, to justify how you feel. This metaphor is free for anyone to use, as long as I get my credit, because I put a lot of work into this. I hope you enjoy, and it works better for you than it did for me.**
(PS all of the above is edited)
July 2020 Edit
So, it's been a while since I've written this. I was going to get rid of the above paragraph and rewrite it, but showing proof of progress is important is it not?
I have since mended my relationship with my father. It wasn't just me doing the mending though. My dad had a lot of healing and growing of his own to do, and as an adult it's been easier for us to talk about our struggles and the issues we had with each other. While I strongly believe that shutting my father out was a very stupid thing for me to do when I did it, it is the past and we have talked about it. I now have me old man on Snapchat and we talk a lot of cr*p! But the good kind.
The person I am now has more patience and understanding of other's actions. Needless to say, I don't just let bad actions slide, but I don't yell. I don't like yelling, I feel it takes away the point you're trying to make, you know? Emotions are a hard bunch to sort through, work with and understand, but you can't help anyone else if you don't know how to help yourself. While I've gone through a lot of hardships in life, I'm grateful for the way I learnt from the world around me. I want this to be a message to everyone struggling: It is hard. It is so hard to get through the hard patches, or just the one, continuous hard patch, but you can do it. It doesn't happen over night, it doesn't just magically become better once you get through it. It's like an old car, the more time you give to maintaining it and looking after it, the smoother it will run. And to you, my beautiful, intelligent and magnificent reader, don't ever give up on yourself. If the hardest battle you fight is waking up in the morning, it's a battle worth fighting. And for the love of the gods, look after your meat suit!! You only get one ;)
With love, Basil.