Published November 12, 2008
I think your poem is good but it could use some help. Some of the lines do not rhyme and some do not make since. The line with the boy who threw up his arms was a little funny. It really did not make much since. The final line was weird and did not belong in with you topic of losing the football game. maybe you could try something else. I hope I helped a bit!
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Umm... I'm guessing you hit new topic instead of post reply. In the future, you want to hit post reply when reviewing a piece.