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Gateway to the Supernatural (2)

by abelgaiya

Read the first part here: Gateway to the Supernatural

The third day since my experiment with DMT. I was beginning to think that what I experienced whilst under the influence of the drug was more than just a hallucination.

For three days I had been hearing strange noises in my home, objects moved without any apparent force responsible for their movement, and I had the uncanny feeling that I am not never alone. It was like an invisible entity was always close to me...always watching me.

The previous day, Professor Mclurkin came to my home to discuss his latest findings. We went into the library and what did we find? All my books were scattered all over the floor. Everything was a mess!

I had to take the Professor somewhere else. I'm sure he thought I'm an untidy man. But who could have done that? There was no one home except me at that time.

Furthermore, every morning when I woke up from sleep, I found myself on the floor, blocks away from the bed on which I was sure I had laid on the previous night.

Of course these could be after effects of the drug...but assumptions must not be made. I have studied my body mechanisms and processes before and after I injected the substance into my system. Everything is as normal as ever. My pulse is regular, my temperature is normal and there was no sign of abnormality in my excreta.

What was I experiencing? What did I miss? Was I going mad? But according to the tests results, my brain was not perturbed when the drug wore off. So I couldn't be going mad.

Then an unethical thought came to me. What if the hallucination of my brother that I saw, was actually him? The man did tell me he would try to get me to believe and make my life miserable, did he not? And now all this was happening to me. Even the wound on my knee which I acquired whilst hallucinating still hurt. I studied closely the metal that was used by the hallucination to inflict the injury. It had my blood on it! It really was used to hit me.

I ruminated over this for a long time until I finally came to a decision. I must take the drug once again! It sounded irrational, but my scientific instinct told me that somehow, the answer lies within another dose of the drug.

I prepared the dosage of 20 ml once again. However, this time I sat on the automatic secure chair which would strap me firmly onto the chair once the injection is made.

Immediately I injected the content of the syringe into my system, I pushed the button on the remote and the metal belts fastened my arms to the arm rest, and my legs to the two front legs of the chair. I then flung the remote as far as I could.

I opened my eyes and could not move my neck for a few seconds.

"You're back. I told you I'd make you believe" The voice I heard three days ago was now audible once more. I raised my head in the direction of the sound, and I saw Brian leaning on the wall a few blocks away from me.

"I do not believe yet. I only want to test a theory that would prove once and for all if all this is true or just a psychologically visual fallacy"

"psycho what?"


"Oooh, all right then, what's this theory you have?"

I was about to respond when I heard loud noises emanating from the storage room. I was bewildered. I had fastened the only door that served as the entrance to the laboratory. I was sure that the code lock was activated, and that no one was in the storage room when I entered the lab.

"Spike! Get out of there. Didn't I tell you I'm the only one who messes with May's stuff?" Brian yelled out to, obviously to the being that was inside my padlocked storage room.

A dog-like creature walked out from the room. It walked through the door!

"How did it do that? And what the hell is that thing?!"

"That's my pet howler. His name's Spike" Brian patted the dog on its head while he spoke. It was a rather peculiar dog. Having a well built body covered with rusty red fur. Its illumed red eyes shone as though they were small electric bulbs.

"This whole thing becomes more unbelievable by the minute" I said. "But all the same, I still have to test my theory"

"Uhuh, back to the theory thingy" The distracted Brian said.

"I know for sure that I'm strapped to this chair without any means to get off without pushing the button on the remote lying over there beyond my reach. If you're a hallucination and you push the button, I would really not be free, although the drug might cause me to visualize it. When the effects of the drug wears off, I would find myself still trapped on this chair. However, if you are a reality, and the button is pushed by you, I would be free both forthwith and after the drug wears off. I have timed the chair to unfasten automatically in two hours, just in case you turn out to me a mendacity."

I had been talking all this while and the idiotic man was playing with his pet.


"Um sorry, could you repeat it? I wasn't listening"

I got infuriated by this statement. I soon calmed down when I realized that time was running out.

"Just push the damn button on the remote over there!" This was the best summary of the long speech I could excavate.

Brian picked the remote off the floor and pushed the unfasten button. The metal belts that held me were immediately unfastened.

"Now, I just have to wait for the drug to wear off so I can ratify to all of this"

"When you find out that I'm real and that the supernatural realm is real, what will you do?"

"It'll be a breakthrough in science! I can only imagine-"

"No no no no no!" Brian interrupted. "The proven existence of the supernatural realm is and can only be known be a few humans"

"But why?"

"Because if all humans knew the powers and forces that exist within my realm, then the realm wars would happen again"

"The realm wars?"

"Ah yes, it's a great story about a great time that great beings from both worlds fought a great battle...that's how my trainer says it"

"Wait, what do you mean?"

"There's no time to explain it to you now, you'll pass out any minute now. But I want you to learn how to use the little spirit molecule produced within your body to see the supernatural realm. That way, you won't have to keep stabbing yourself with those large needles"

"But how?" I asked faintly. The dizziness was creeping in slowly. I knew I was about to pass out.

"Madame Lavigne will teach you"

I could not reply. Everything began to blur out until darkness was all I could see.

I woke up on the floor, just like the last time. I gazed at the chair in which i sat before the experiment. I stood up and went to the door of the storage room. I unlocked it and found the whole place in a mess.

It seemed DMT does not cause hallucinations; it merely opens an individual to the supernatural.

I exited my lab and walked to my library where I usually sat to ponder over my troubles. When I walked past the sitting room, I heard a familiar word. A word i had recently just heard. I took some steps backward and saw the television turned on. A commercial for psychic reading was running. But what did I hear that drew me back?

"For professional psychic readings, visit Madam Lavigne now!"

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254 Reviews

Points: 9214
Reviews: 254

Mon Feb 04, 2013 12:12 am
Omnom wrote a review...

Here to review! My name is Omniyus, and I will be reviewing this piece for you!

Supernatural, ooh fun, let's get started!

and I had the uncanny feeling that I am not never alone

That is a double negative over there! You see it? Right there!
You could have just done, "I am never alone." Or something along those lines.

blocks away from the bed on which I was sure I had laid on the previous night.

Blocks? As in the streets? I'm pretty sure that if I was the MC, I would think something was up if I woke up BLOCKS from my bed. I think you meant feet or possibly even yards, but blocks is pretty huge!

But according to the tests results, my brain was not perturbed when the drug wore off. So I couldn't be going mad.

The 'but' isn't needed, and you could have joined those two sentences together.

It sounded irrational, but my scientific instinct told me that somehow, the answer lies within another dose of the drug.

Very irrational indeed!

This story is great! I do hope you write more of it. I haven't gotten the chance of reading the first one, but I will do that the moment I get free time!

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1220 Reviews

Points: 72525
Reviews: 1220

Sun Feb 03, 2013 11:22 pm
Kale wrote a review...

Hello abelgaiya. I, Kyllorac, a Knight of the Green Room am here to liberate this installment of yours from the verdant grasp of the Green Room!

Though I'm honestly wondering how this managed to stay in the Green Room for so long. You have a pretty interesting concept going here, and the installments are in nice, brief, bite-sized chunks, so this feels like it should've never wound up lurking in the Green Room to begin with.

But I digress.

AlfredSymon already mentioned the errors, but as they were present in both installments posted thus far, I'm going to reiterate them for emphasis. Considering how short each installment of this is and how many of these errors you have, they are a serious blemish on your writing and are seriously distracting. I spent a fair amount of time reading these installments distracted by errors, which is not a good way to make your readers spend their time reading, though the concept itself was interesting enough to keep bringing my attention back to the story.

One class of error AlfredSymon did not mention were the tense shifts, where you changed between past and present within the same sentence. One example of this shifting of tenses can be found in the second paragraph: "I had the uncanny feeling that I am not never alone." Here, you switch from "had" (past, which the rest of the story up until this point has been) to "am" (present), and then you switch back to past in the next sentence. It's quite jarring, and as tenses are a way of keeping track of when things happen, muddled tenses also tend to muddle the sequence of events.

Now, if you could just polish this up so that you eliminate all the errors, then this story would be able to really shine.

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308 Reviews

Points: 25520
Reviews: 308

Mon Jan 14, 2013 3:38 am
AlfredSymon wrote a review...

Abel! Hey, Alf here for a review! Ain't it very...creepy here? Waaah! What was that!? Oh, it's your story. It's because it's supernatural. Get it, supernatural? Oh forget itl, here's my review for you!

NOTES: If this is a part 2 of a short story, try dropping the parentheses and just give a whole number two. If this is a continuation of a short story per se, would you please post the whole story in to one work? With that, reviewers can cover more! :)

I think one of the most remarkable part of your piece is the theme and concept. Why? Because it was kept all along the piece. See, I saw the eerie theme. There was darkness and a bit of scare, yet you kept everything at a steady pace, not action-packed, but very realistic. I think these types of stories are most remarkable because they're not scary due to the blood and gore, but scary because they're almost real enough to happen.

The concept that almost anything can happen to almost any kind of people is also great. I can see the surreal fluidity of the main character's story. Those parts are very remarkable.

On your storytelling, well, it's good on it's own, but there's always room for improvement, right? Let' see here. On perspectives first. It's okay to play with tenses, see, but there are times where we can be very much confused because of the changing paces of the story. Thus we could set certain tenses to certain perspectives. In here, first-person, I recommend writing in PRESENT tense. This is because you can easily share what was happening through the eyes. See, people can't easily remember everything, right? So writing in past might be strange. Think of those characters remembering every detail! So instead of writing from memory, try writing presently. Just a suggestion here!

Spelling and capitalization errors, they're swirling the piece. When you try editing it, try to take out those errors, too.

That's all for now, folks! I'll leave the other editing to you imagination! Good luck!

Your pal,
Al :)

abelgaiya says...

Thanks a lot for the tips. I'll make sure I act on them.

I am and always will be optimist, the hoper of far-flung hopes, the dreamer of improbable dreams.
— 11th Doctor