Young Writers Society

I don't find this irritating to read. There's nothing irritating in reading about self-harm imo, and the rating for this is already set as having mature content. I think it provides great insight as to what someone enduring depression would feel. There's a sense of hopelessness and a sense of being misunderstood. Though, if you're suffering through anything in this note, you should talk to someone on this site or elsewhere in your life you can trust. This doesn't have to be "it", you know?

Hello there.

I figured since I bumped the rating on this to an 18+ for that big ol' F-Bomb, I'd give it a review as well. Let's see...

This is personal for you. I dislike touching stories that center around suicide, since more than likely, it's close to the author's heart and I don't want to open any old wounds or start a fight. >_> As such, I won't bother with correcting your grammar or talking about imagery, etc. This is more like a blog (which we do have, found here), so I'll treat it as such.

This is strangely beautiful for a suicide note. That sounds odd, I know, but it was explained so nicely. It wasn't just focused on the self-harm and the reason(s) for why the narrator is going to kill themselves; it was more deep than that. More explanatory. I dunno, I just liked it. ^^

Something you could add in would be a bigger, better reason why. Or reasons. Being aloof and mysterious is cool and all, but I don't think it works for this story. Why is the narrator wanting to kill themselves? I want to know why, especially when they say they have people who care about them. Speaking of these people, how do they make the narrator feel? I know that if I wanted to commit suicide (and believe me, I've been there) and I had someone, anyone, telling me they cared about me, it would change everything. You wouldn't want to do it anymore. Unless you're too far gone. So I want to know -- why does this not affect the narrator in any way? Why does the narrator still continue to feel they way, even after someone has looked them in the eye and told them they care?

Besides that, I'm not sure what else to say. I know this was hard for you to write, and I know it's close to you, personally. I just want you to know that those people that care about you won't be the same if you do something. Even if it's just self-harm. When you love someone, you die a little inside whenever they're hurt. That's just what love is. And they aren't gonna stop loving you. No matter what you think you're doing wrong, you're probably perfect in their eyes. So please, give them a call. Say I love you. Go get a cup of coffee. Enjoy your life; you're so young. It gets better. They'll help make it better. You'll see, I hope.

Here is a list of suicide hotlines, for a wide range of countries, if you want to talk to someone anonymously. I encourage you to do something, anything, and reach out, so someone can help you. Take care of yourself, okay?

Hope this helps,

~Iggy

;~; why? It just makes me sad, it's depressing beyond sensibility and its sad and slightly irritating. What is the point of this?

Wow, that touched my heart, it really did, I just read it over and over again, it really moved me, I really hope that this isn't actually happening in your life, if it is feel free to talk to me, I have gone through the same thing. There are a few things though I suggest you could fix, maybe don't but this in poem, and spilt the paragraphs up, which would make this a lot easier to read.

But anyway that was actually amazing, and I loved it, it held so much emotion, and thankyou for sharing this with me!

Jack