z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone Violence

The Book Man, Chapters 3-4 (Revised)

by BluesClues


3 THE BALLOON-ARTIST

It was the balloon-artist, standing on the front stoop with a sheaf of papers tucked under one arm. Christian hesitated, embarrassed at the circumstances of their earlier run-in, but he opened the door just enough to peer outside.

“Can I help you?” he asked. The other man held out the papers.

“Brought these for you, lad.”

He had managed to rescue a stack of accounting forms. Christian took them and said, “Thank you.”

“Figured they might be important. And I thought you might like a balloon, too. What’s your favorite animal, lad?”

“Er,” said Christian, unaccustomed (as you'd expect) to being offered balloon-animals at his age. “Well, I like turtles.”

The balloon-artist procured a green balloon from his waistcoat, and faster than a blink he had twisted it into a turtle. He drew a face on it with a marker and added some scales. When it was finished, he handed it to Christian.

“How’s that?”

“Incredible,” said Christian, opening the door a little wider. He’d never seen a turtle made out of fewer than two balloons.

The balloon-artist gave a deep bow, grinning.

“Why, thank you.” He handed the balloon-turtle to the accountant and said, “Go on, lad. Take a good look.”

“I beg your pardon,” said Christian, opening the door all the way to take the turtle, “but why do you keep saying that?”

The dark brow wrinkled in puzzlement. “Saying what, lad?”

“That. Lad, I mean. I mean—I’m not complaining, but I am thirty-seven today and—”

“A youngster,” the balloon-artist said. “I’m sixty-two.”

Christian blinked, for he would’ve pegged the other man closer to his own age, as unlined as his face and black as his beard were. Before he could say anything, however, the balloon-artist continued, “Thirty-seven today? Do you mean to tell me it’s your birthday?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Oh, no, lad, not sir,” the balloon-artist said, holding out a hand. “Conrad. Conrad Smithson.”

Christian shook the proffered hand. Forgetting he had introduced himself earlier, he said, “Christian Abernathy. Won’t you come in? That is—I mean to say—”

He could feel his ears burning; he rarely spoke to strangers, and he never invited them into his home. But the lonely silence of the house—somewhat mitigated by the music issuing from the record player in the study and the cat now sleeping on his desk—had retreated further before the laughter and easy speech of this particular stranger. Thus he was crestfallen when Conrad Smithson shook his head and said, “Told the other half I’d meet her for dinner. Another time, perhaps.”

“Oh,” said Christian. “Alright. Thank you for the turtle.”

He began to close the door, redder than ever at the rejection, but the balloon-artist put a hand on the doorframe to stop him.

“Why don’t you come along? Unless, of course, you’ve got any big birthday plans. We’re going to the Aquarium.”

Christian opened the door again.

“I wouldn’t want to impose,” he said hopefully. Conrad grinned as if he knew what the accountant was thinking.

“No imposition at all. Come on, lad. The night is young and I’m certainly not one to let my fellow man spend his birthday alone.”

Christian was delighted. The two men took the bus across town to the Aquarium to meet Conrad’s wife for dinner. She, it turned out, worked as an accountant for the same company he did, which was no doubt what had attracted her to her husband in the first place: the balloon-artist’s profession must seem enchanting to two accountants who spent all day poring over columns of numbers.

4 THE PARK ACROSS THE WAY

It was Conrad who told him Celadon Park was magical.

It was a Saturday in June, and Christian fumbled with a red balloon, trying to turn it into a ladybird. Conrad insisted on tutoring him in the art of balloon-animals on Saturdays, not because the accountant showed any talent for the craft (he didn’t), but because it got him out-of-doors and interacting (however marginally) with the public.

Conrad watched his friend struggle with the balloon for a while and offered him a new one when it popped, turning away only when he had customers. Already an abundance of colorful, shredded rubber littered the top of the cart, but at last Christian straightened and held out a clumsy ladybird for scrutiny.

“Not done yet, lad,” the balloon-artist said, tossing him a marker. “It’s not a ladybird without some spots.”

“Not all ladybirds have spots,” Christian replied, but he fell silent as he concentrated on drawing circles onto the balloon-animal, another field in which he was sadly lacking.

“And where’d you read that?”

Insects of Britain and Northern Europe, third edition. Some species have stripes or no markings at all.”

The accountant finished drawing the ladybird’s spots and handed the balloon to Conrad. The balloon-artist turned it over and over in his hands, examining it as if it were a Van Gogh.

“You’re getting better,” he said. “You might be ready for butterflies soon.”

“I don’t know about that,” Christian said, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose as he looked at his handiwork. “It still feels awkward.”

“I don’t see why. The fingers you got, you should be a pianist.”

“My father tried giving me lessons once.”

Conrad grinned. “And how’d that go?”

Christian took his ladybird back and said, “I think I’ll stick to balloon-animals.”

The day wore on into the lazy heat of mid-afternoon, when park-goers gathered in the shade and passersby were few. The two men plopped themselves down on the sidewalk with their backs against the stone wall of the park. From their seat they could see a sliver of greenery just inside the gate. Christian peered at it, craning his neck for a better view.

“You ever been inside?” Conrad asked.

“Inside the park?”

“Yeah.”

Christian considered. He had not, though from his reading-chair it had always looked mysterious and exciting, with its ivy-draped walls and ancient trees.

The balloon-artist watched him and said, “I know—you haven’t. Too many people for you, I’m guessing.”

“I like my books,” Christian said.

“I know it, lad. But let me tell you something. That park there? It’s like nothing you’ve ever seen. Like something out of your books.”

“What do you mean?”

Conrad leaned closer to him and said in a low voice, “It’s magic.”

There was silence for a moment, the silence of a summer afternoon, broken only by the whine of a bush-cricket. Then the accountant asked, “What do you mean, magic?”

His friend winked. “That, I won’t say. Know why?”

Christian shook his head. The balloon-artist pointed to the menagerie they’d made that morning.

“Because it’s part of my scheme to get you out of your house more often, like this is. Get you away from those books for a little while.”

Christian said nothing.

“Now you’re mad at me, that’s certain,” the balloon-artist said. “But look, lad. I love books too, you know that. There’s nothing wrong with a healthy appetite for reading—I wish more people had one. But there’s a point when a man has to stop reading about life and start living it.”

Christian’s ears turned red.

“I have to go,” he said.

Conrad nodded and settled back against the wall. The accountant was already halfway across the street when the balloon-artist called, “You have to go at night.”

Christian went into the Book House without waving goodbye.


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Sun Sep 20, 2020 1:01 pm
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Valkyria wrote a review...



I'll admit, I was a little surprised when I saw the two chapters put together. But, as you said, they weren't long, so I see why. :)

He had managed to rescue a stack of accounting forms. Christian took them and said, “Thank you.”


That's so nice of him!

Christian blinked, for he would’ve pegged the other man closer to his own age, as unlined as his face and black as his beard were.


He looks as good as Ned Flanders.

The balloon-artist watched him and said, “I know—you haven’t. Too many people for you, I’m guessing.”

“I like my books,” Christian said.


It's kinda scary how much I relate to Christain.

I'm really enjoying this story, so far!




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Sun Sep 07, 2014 12:53 pm
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kayfortnight says...



Why the two chapters put together? Were you low on points when you posted? :)




BluesClues says...


Nah, but they weren't terribly long. There were a lot more chapters posted together like this in the earlier draft, but things got longer during revisions.


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kayfortnight says...


That makes sense :)


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kayfortnight says...


I know my chapters get longer as I edit, too. Will start actually reviewing these once I get to the point in the story where you don't have many.



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Fri Jul 04, 2014 1:27 pm
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TimmyJake wrote a review...



Timmy here, yet again. Only one gazillion chapters left before I am finished!

Oh, Conrad. Why are you so mysteriousssss? That guy. Arggh. He is determined to make everything a mystery for poor Christian. That, I won’t say. Know why?” Now I want to know what is inside that park. What lurks behind the gates I haven't seen yet. I am super excited for this book, and the park, of which I am of the (guess)opinion that a lot of the book and the adventures will happen inside the park--but that is just my immediate impression by the mysterious outlook you have given us so far. Only time will tell if my immediate assumptions are correct. :)

Now this isn't really a nitpick, but just a personal preference that you can take as gibberish or a stylistic/preference nitpick. Take it either way. I think that Conrad calls him "lad" too much, over-saying the name. I don't know why I think that, but I do. I spotted less than ten of those references, but for some reason they grated on me like they didn't belong. A few just so that the reader can tell that Conrad is older, yes. But I felt as though it was overused just a little bit.
Just read it over and counted. There are ten instances. :P

The balloon-artist procured a green balloon from his waistcoat, and faster than a blink he had twisted it into a turtle.


Something that I have learned overtime is that you must describe every step, no matter how small and trivial it seems. Here, you forgot to mention that he blew the balloon up before twisting it into the turtle. Love his profession, by the way. Very original, and just seems to make him an even cooler guy that if he had a normal profession. For some reason, he gave me at first impression of the guy in "Up", the cartoon by Disney.(Which happens to be my favorite cartoon by Disney, sadly including Tangled. :P) Of course, before his wife died. :)

Thus he was crestfallen when Conrad


"Thus" seems too... I dunno, stern of a word for your writing? In Shakespeare it would work out just fine and seem very realistic, but in your work, I didn't think it fit in very well.
But if you decide to keep it, I believe you may need a comma after "Thus" :)

balloon-artist called, “You have to go at night.”


Don't get mad at me here, but my initial impression of what he meant is far different from what he actually intended. You don't even want to know what I thought--very crazily thought, but nevertheless, the thought went through my mind--before I understood what he implied. I think if you added "park" to the sentence, it would help a lot.

Through with nitpicks. This chapter was even more enjoyable than the last one, which, frankly, I thought was impossible. I love your style of writing, the omniscient way of looking at things, instead of first or third person like most people do. Buttt... when I read, I occasionally see small snippets of third person writing, which I just love to pieces. You are a very fluctuating writer, it seems. And have a very broad style which covers every aspect of the story in effortless words that just seem to float off the page, creating the picture for me. Not joking, either. I am as serious as a heart attack.

And you don't even want to know how serious that is. Just so you can see what I mean, the last paragraph had no smilies. Now something made me become serious. Well, for at least a few moments, anyway.
~Darth Timmyjake, signing out for the third time.




BluesClues says...


Oh my gosh. Your reviews have me literally laughing out loud, buddy. Holy crap.

Don't get mad at me here, but my initial impression of what he meant is far different from what he actually intended. You don't even want to know what I thought--very crazily thought, but nevertheless, the thought went through my mind--before I understood what he implied.


o.0

Okay, now you HAVE to tell me what you thought he meant.



timmyjake says...


You have to go might tell you...
I don't know why this went through my mind, but for some reason, I thought he was telling him when to use the restroom... O_o



BluesClues says...


Heh heh heh. "ONLY GO TO THE RESTROOM AT NIGHT, CHRISTIAN. It's healthiest for your bowels!"



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Tue May 13, 2014 2:19 pm
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Hannah wrote a review...



Hey there~ Back for more 'cause I can't keep away haha.

but the accountant never arrived at the real reason why: Conrad annoyed him on purpose.


I don't think you need to spell this out for the reader. I think we've all arrived at this conclusion on our own, and it would be better to show Christian's frustration instead of telling it this way!

Christian plucked The Hobbit from his shelves, a favorite since childhood.


I would be careful about mentioning specific titles, as this kind of takes away from the fantasy element of a man who built a whole house of books and a magical park and all that you've been describing up until now. If you want it to seem more realistic, you'll have to do so from the get go so we're not startled by the appearance of the REAL title of a REAL book in this FANTASY story.

The Hobbit


Oh man, and you definitely don't need to mention it by title every single time it comes up -- that's like four or five times now, haha, where you could just say "his book" or something simpler! haha

I DO LIKE THE ACTION THAT HAS SUDDENLY APPEARED THOUGH.
And I'm theorizing that maybe Conrad is so lame and pushy 'cause he's A DEMON or something bad like that -- something a hell hound might be after, and maybe he has a reason to think Christian's below him!

I dunno, the other half of my brain says, "You didn't read Sherlock Holmes and the Hounds of Wherever, but is this a reference"? xD

Alright, so now it's clear that this is not going to be a story about the evolving but quiet relationship between two men. There's an action that we're moving toward, and now in THIS case, I would recommend cutting the previous chapters down into one or two. I feel like the sooner you get to the real action, the better, and you can set up the dynamic between Christian and Conrad pretty easy through a vivid summary.

Lemme know what you think! I'll keep reading on. ;)




BluesClues says...


"The Hounds of the Baskervilles," but I've never read it either so if it is a reference it's an unintentional one.



Hannah says...


Haha, yes that one. I thought it had hell hounds as well! But cool -- neither of us have read the classics. mwuahahaha.



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GreenTulip wrote a review...



Hi, Tulip here again to review your wonderful chapter. Which is well leaving me on the theoretical edge of my seat.

I loved this chapter. I was well done. NOthing seemed to be moving to fast. You have his annoyance and frsutration transitioning into his panic as the events unfold. It is well done.

I felt like the pasing was fast. He was trying to sleep but for a while couldn't so he heads to read. He skims the bookshelfs. He finds one to read. He goes to read, and then hears the russel. It goes away so he begins to read agian....blah blah blah. It is transitioned from part to part very nicely.

My facorite part of this chapter:

At sunset Christian made his way to the kitchen for a soothing cup of tea, still fuming. His attitude was not helped by the fact that he couldn’t find his tea kettle. He cursed and went to his study to read. What was wrong with reading? Nothing at all. It was a less ridiculous past-time than making balloon-animals. And at least he had a real job. At least he stopped reading long enough to go to a place that required him to keep regular hours and answer to other people.




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Alpha wrote a review...



Just here to leave a tiny semi-useless review. ^-^ I'm really enjoying this. Action chapter! I would agree with Lauren about starting as close to the action as possible, but what I read so far is so hooking that I don't mind the action starting now and all that..

So Christian grabbed his house keys off the hook by the door, grabbed The Hobbit from the floor and slipped it into his pocket for comfort, and stepped outside, locking the door behind him. Then he took Conrad’s arm and helped him across the street to the park.

He took The Hobbit with him? If I were in his situation, The Hobbit will probably remain discarded on the floor for the rest of the book, ha. But I guess he would take a book with him, he's the book man. I love the interactions between Christian and Conrad.

One last thing:
It was only when he reached his destination that he flicked on a lamp and perused the shelves for a book. He passed over Wuthering Heights, Jane Eyre, and the works of Rex Stout; he did not like reading tales of ghosts and murder at night, no matter how much he enjoyed them otherwise. He skipped, too, some of the duller classics that his father had bought him for a Christmas long past (although he thought that Moby Dick might be just the thing to put him back to sleep).

Too much unnecessary information. They're nice to know, but they don't contribute to the story.
Off to read the rest.

Keep on writing!
Cheers,
--Alpha




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Lauren2010 wrote a review...



And I return! Happy Review Day! Here's to more Book Man. ^^

Page Five

The balloon-artist could annoy him like no one else, but he never arrived at the real reason why, which was that Conrad annoyed him on purpose.

This sentence is confusing to me. First, why does he annoy Christian? I thought they were friends, and Christian liked his company? It just seems like a sudden change of attitude with little explanation or anything to suggest it.

Second, this sentence is just too long. There are too many thoughts going on that it makes the sentence as a whole clunky and hard to understand. I would suggest either ending it at the first or second comma. I would probably go with the first comma, but that's just me! Going with the second comma might allow you to expound more on why Conrad is annoying him on purpose.

More on the annoyance: is it reasonable for Christian to be so absolutely enraged that Conrad told him perhaps he shouldn't live too much in fictional worlds? I mean, he even said reading was great. Just that it might not be healthy to avoid real life. It might be reasonable for Christian to be a bit peeved, but he seems outright raging at the minor insult.

This chapter as a whole has so much wonderful action in it! I love that we finally get to see some moving around and some tension. I actually might suggest, in revision, starting the story as close to this moment as possible. This seems like it's kicking off the action of the actual plot, and the best writing advice I've ever gotten is to start writing as close to that moment as possible. Give the reader just enough information to understand the characters and the setting enough to start the plot, and then develop the characters through their participation in action. We can be told over and over what a character is like, but nothing gets the job done like seeing for ourselves what they're like by watching them in action.

Further, I'm still not sure I have a good read on either of these characters. Christian is the most solid, but mostly in respect to his love of books. I don't know a whole lot past that two-dimensional depiction of him. Conrad is even hazier. I think I have a good read on him one second, then the next I'm lost again. I understand he's supposed to make a sudden transition (in this moment particularly) from familiar to strange, but he needs a firmer grounding in something before you can effectively shake that up. I can't even figure out how old he is in comparison to Christian (he comes off as an old/older man to me, but how I've heard you talk about people shipping them I have to imagine them closer in age which makes a lot of his dialogue awkward. Is Christian actually older than I'm imagining? In my mind, he's early to mid thirties and Conrad is upwards of 50).

Other than that, yay for action! I'm really excited to see where we're going, and what's so special about the inside of that park. Lovely chapter, can't wait for more!

Keep writing!

-Lauren-




BluesClues says...


Conrad is indeed upwards of fifty. Way upwards, actually, and there's a reason he looks young. But anyway, thanks for the review and I just wanted to tell you that!



Lauren2010 says...


Good to know! Glad I was getting it right, which is a mark of good writing ^^ How old is Christian then?



BluesClues says...


Thirty-seven. It's just mentioned in the...second chapter. Yes.



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Messenger wrote a review...



Messenger here for you again Blue! This better be good :p

Oh boy I was totally not expecting this at all Blue! I thought it would be more of a mental battle in Christian's mind, rather than a hell-hound trying to chomp of Conrad's leg! Speaking of which that is kind of terrifying.
I think at this point I should say that I'm really starting to like Conrad. He just seems like a cool person so far! I was really afraid he was going to die in this chapter and just tell Christian to run, but thankfully you didn't do that cliche.

The action in this chapter was exciting and fast-paced!I'm wondering why there has never been an incident like this before that Christian knows of, but I'm sure I'll find out eventually. I can't wait to see what will be in the park! I assume the hound didn't come from there cuz that wouldn't exactly make sense but . . . .

You had a good mix of fear and pace in this picture. That can be hard to not go overboard on one side or the other but you had a nice balance. Like Deanie said you could add a little bit more to Christian's reaction, but not a whole lot. Can't wait to see what lies in the park, an what Conrad and Christian have to do with this!

~Messenger




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Deanie wrote a review...



Heya Blue!

Hehe this is going to get interesting. I want to know why a hellhound had decided to chase Conrad! And I'm so curious to find out what's in the park. When he said magical I'm starting to believe it's more magical than a normal park...

Although I did like the chapter I think there could be a lot more surprise on Christian's part. I mean a hellhound was tearing up after his friend. And he also pretty much casually walks out of his house although he's only relying on Conrad's word that the hellhound is gone. Especially if he hasn't dealt with one before.

I find it kind of funny that he was reading the Hobbit, and he took it with him. Because you know, he's going on a journey to an unfamiliar place somewhat reluctantly because he was told to. Which, if I remember correctly is sorta how the Hobbit starts out, or is it not? If it is, then it's a great comparison to have in there ^^

Really, I have no more critique. Just spice up the surprise in this chapter by spicing up Christians reaction!

Deanie x




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Auxiira says...



sorry, somehow managed to double post >.> Not a review though, so eh.




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Auxiira wrote a review...



So, I've fetched myself a cup of tea, taken the Tapioca out of the oven, put on some potato wedges, and a couple of washed, and have come back for more Book Man.

Page 5:
Hmmm, this seems a little telly:

The balloon-artist could annoy him like no one else, but he never arrived at the real reason why, which was that Conrad annoyed him on purpose.
Say maybe: "The balloon-artist could annoy him like no one else, and seemed to delight in it, but the lanky man was clueless to this."

Okay, this may be an English/American spelling, but shouldn't "past-time" be pastime? Because it's something you pass time with...

Ohh, I found the fact that Wuthering Heights was mentioned funny, cause I'm reading it for school at the moment... >.>

I would imagine a lot more fear and "rabbit-in-the-headlights"ness from Christian at the presence of a hellhound, and more incomprehension. He seems to like his way of living, and to be resistant to change (though I may be wrong) so let that through!

Conrad seems a lot more authoritarian, and it's an interesting side of him. I wonder, does he have a second life somewhere?

Ah, would the front door not be damaged by the hellhound scrabbling against it? I've seen what happens when my god scrabbles against the door, and I'd expect a hellhound to have sharper claws...

And yay! Christian is finally going to the park! what will he fiiiiind?

**

Overall, maybe a few inconsistancies in character and details, but I'm still loving The Book Man!

'Till the next chapter!
Auxii~




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Thu Mar 06, 2014 4:43 pm
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Tenyo wrote a review...



Part 5!

Or page 5... or chapter 5? Who knows.

Introspection

I really, really like the first half of this. It's another glimpse into the minds of these two characters- Conrad annoying him on purpose is something I find quite amusing XD

Seeing Christian's thoughts and habits rolling out onto the page brings him to life. Maybe you could incorporate some of that into the beginning?

Buff it out!

You kind of lose it again as you get further down the page. You've proven you have the skills to do it, you just need to find that balance between action, dialogue, description and introspection. Keep buffing out the text with everything you can possibly think of- what's around them, what's going through their minds, what their movements look like, what their voices sound like.

Once you've got the hang of doing that then you can just chop out all the parts you don't like.

Writing style

There's something kind of quaint about your writing style that's really enjoyable to read. It's smooth and has a strong voice to it. I imagine this would be an awesome novel for reading aloud, or as an audiobook.




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Magenta wrote a review...



So we meet again, BlueAfrica? Yes, tis I, your dearest friend, Magenta, to come forward and present ye with a quick review on this magnificent day! Don't worry, I won't speak that way for the rest of my review. ;) Anyway, Happy Review Day! I just submitted a review for your other chapter, but I decided to come back and write one for your firth chapter in, The Book Man.

"At sunset Christian made his way to the kitchen for a soothing cup of tea, still fuming."

I must say that you have a great deal of skill in writing and this story has great potential. Here, in this sentence, I would only suggest adding a comma at the end of the phrase here, "At sunset". Commas are usually positioned in such places where a pause is. Fuming? Perhaps another word because I wouldn't really want a fuming cup of tea. It doesn't sound as soothing as you say it is. Perhaps that's just my ears (well, really eyes because I am reading this).

"That was what books were for." I'm not sure if the italicization here is quite necessary. It doesn't seem to offer the effects that you are looking for. I would consider keeping it in league with the rest of the sentence.

"They were an escape into other worlds, a way to travel without ever leaving the comfort of his reading-chair."

There is no such need for a hyphen between the words "reading" and "chair" here. I would suggest taking that out as well. Another thing would be to provide the reader with more imagery and description. I feel that you haven't left any room for the reader's assumptions. What I mean to say is that you do more telling than showing, as our teachers might have said in english. I might change this sentence here to "Book were means of escaping this horrid world, where one could travel through time and space without ever leaving the comfort of their chair." Something more juicy and descriptive. I think you could do that with may sentences. Here as well...

"At eleven he tried going to bed, but he was so annoyed that he could not fall asleep. He lay in bed for nearly an hour with his glasses off and the covers pulled up to his chin, staring at the blurred specks of stars through the ceiling. Then he got up, put his glasses back on, and went to the reading-room for a book."

After adding a comma after "at eleven", I would just change this around a bit. I would also take out the hyphen that you've placed between the words "reading" and "room. Here is my revised sentence that you could take into consideration or use to improve your own.

"At eleven, Christian buried himself beneath the covers, attempting to catch some sleep. Of course, his annoyance prevented that, keeping him awake. This disturbance was occupied by the constant readjusting of positions and checking of the time. For an hour, with his glasses off and covers up to his chin, he stared at the stars that speckled the ceiling with their luminous bodies." Soemthing like that.
I do think that this is your only thing you need to work on. Still, I believe that you have a great knowledge in writing and I would love to see some more chapters.

~ Magenta




BluesClues says...


I've got all of them up to chapter thirteen posted so far :) Glad you're enjoying it.



Magenta says...


Yay! More reading! @BlueAfrica!



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Iggy wrote a review...



I'm here <3

... and I'm gonna leave a crappy review that might be unhelpful to you, because I've found no nitpicks. Not one. Okay, fine, maybe a bit of annoyance at Christian because, uh hello, Conrad said it was a freaking hellhound. Does that not weird you out all?, since, y'know, hellhounds aren't real! (or are they..) No but seriously, I was disappointed with his reaction to that. :P

Besides that. Your character development? Gold. You've kept Christian steady so far, at a nice and slow pace, and I love it. I also like the growing relationship between Chrad here, even though I am disappointed that a.) this isn't the gay couple you were talking about and b.) ugh, your sister knows more than I do! D;

I hate/love the cliffhanger ending you've given us. It was a great way to end the chapter, but I'm mad because I have so many questions that need answering! First off, you better explain where this hellhound came from, what friends it might be bringing, and why it was after Conrad. After that, you better tell me why the Park is so special, missy!

I can't wait to read more. <3




BluesClues says...


Yay! And thanks for the note on Christian's reaction to the hellhound. I think I didn't think about that because he was busy freaking out about the blood...but you're right, he should at least have a moment where he's like, "wtf is he talking about?"




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