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The Magic In Me: A New Life Chapter 2

by ChimeraMania

After I got out of the shower I found a white and black long sleeves shirt, white skinny jeans, and my black high top nikes waiting for me.

Even though I’m not a girly girl, I love to shop for shoes. Adira either, but she loves shopping for clothes, especially pants.

I put on the clothes and walked out of the bathroom with wet hair. I found my stuff packed and ready to go.

Adria stood up from her spot on my bed.

“Thats my girl.” She smiled which made me smile. “Come here let and me do something to that hair of yours.”

“You know you sound like a mother.”

“Thats cause I have a mother who says the same things to me.” I went to her.

Unlike me, Adria has her mother. He father died when she was little. He died in a car reck. I remember that day she was crying. I asked her what was wrong. It was her father’s birthday.

She cries every year on his birthday.

“Makes me kind glad I have a father, just a little bit.”

She sat down on the bed and I sat on the floor. She already had the flatiron, curlers, and blow dryer pulled up.

She blow dried my hair then flat ironed it. All of that took only sixty five minutes. While she was curling my hair I heard daddy pull up in the drive way.

Don’t ask me how I know its him, I just have this feeling like its him; and I was right.

He walked into the room, just as Adria had finished. We stood up and faced him.

We just stared at each other.

“How do I look?” I had put on some blush and mascara and lipstick with lipgloss over it while I was in the bathroom. Sorry I like shinny things, so I had to have lipgloss.

“Like your mother when I met her. Just without the extra bits of makeup and a different shirt.”

I felt tears at the corners of my eyes, I started blinking them away.

Clearing his throat.

“Okay lets go get some ice cream.”

Adria and I picked up a suitcase and headed out the door. When I got outside I dropped my suitcase.

Sitting in the driveway is a white truck with Rosalyn, in black, on the hood. I swear if I didn’t close my mouth soon a fly would fly in.

I felt my feet moving closer to the truck. Either the truck was spinning slowly or I was walking around it.

When I made it to the back I noticed in small black letters where daddy’s name and Adria’s name. I touched both of them, then keep walking. I made it back to the front. I wanted to scream so bad but I didn’t. Instead the tears I tried to hold back, came out.

Glad the type of mascara I put on was water proof.

I turn to father and jumped into his arms.

“Thank you so much.” I turned my head a kissed him on the cheek.

“Your so welcome baby girl. The color was Adria’s idea.”

I let go of him and picked her up. I kissed her. Then sat her back down realizing.

“Thats why you wanted me to wear this.”

She smiled and I kissed her again.

I moved back to the truck and hopped in the drivers seat.

“Can I dr..”

“Who else is going to drive your brand new truck baby girl?” Daddy said.

“Yeah babe girl, you know I ain’t got my license. I get them tomorrow though. You also know that daddy here wouldn’t get it for you not to drive.” Adria said.

“Okay, so where the....”

He handed me the keys. I cranked her...

“Is it a girl or a boy?” I asked.I like to give my truck a name and in order to do that I have to know if its a girl or a boy.I hope they understood the question.

“A girl of course.”

I cranked her up and put her in reverse.

Once in the street. “Come one baby girl, lets see what your made of.” I sped off.

I was going sixty five, we made it to the ice cream place in under fifteen minutes and its a thirty five minute drive from my house going to speed limit.

“I love you already, baby girl.” I told the truck.

“Hope thats after us though.” Adria said pointing to her and daddy from the back seat.

“Of course.” I kiss daddy on the cheek and Adria on the lips. “Lets go get iced.”

We hopped out the truck. I was feeling good.

But it didn’t last long.

Once we got done eating our ice cream it was time to go again.

I hopped into the truck and took my time to drive up to the school. I knew I shouldn’t. Adria needs to be at school and father had to go to work soon, but I didn’t want them to leave just yet. I didn’t want to see what was waiting for me when I got there either.

This school isn’t that far a drive from where Adria lives, but its far from were I live. Used to live, I guess I have to think that now.

As is hearing what I just thought.

“No, babe girl, that house is still your home.” Adria said. “This doesn’t change anything.”

“I wish my head thought that.” I looked at her in the rearview mirror. “I just wish I didn’t have to move from you.” I looked at daddy. “Or you.” Then I looked back at the road because the next turn was pulling into the school’s parking lot.”

I let out a breath and found a parking spot.

We got out and as soon as I stepped foot on the ground I saw a light, a very bright one at that. I looked up.

My mouth feel open. So many angels.

Then it felt like something was moving under my feet so I looked down.

My mouth still open. So many not angels.

Then I felt it. Some power, well thats what I think it is. Its the same feeling I felt the first time, but much more powerful.

I didn’t realize someone was calling my name. So when I looked up someone was walking towards me, but before he even got to me. It seemed like the ground wanted to say hey to my head, because they met and I didn’t like what was running from the side of my head once they did.

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1238 Reviews

Points: 35807
Reviews: 1238

Sun May 26, 2013 11:52 pm
niteowl wrote a review...

Hi SharraeWilson! Overall, the plot's okay, but the voice is really throwing me. The way the MC narrates, she sounds like she's 10, 12 max. Way too young for cars and girlfriends. The whole scenario is rather confusing. Her dad and her (hopefully teenage) girlfriend bought her a car? And why does it have their names on it? Also, why does she have to move away from both her dad and girlfriend? Granted, I didn't read previous chapters, but it seems strange that she wouldn't live with her dad if she has no mother.

The end was pretty sudden, but it seems like something interesting's coming with her seeing angels and demons. Overall, this could be interesting if you made the voice more in line with that of an older teenager. Keep writing! :)

User avatar
28 Reviews

Points: 132
Reviews: 28

Tue May 07, 2013 11:46 pm
happyslappy13 wrote a review...

Not bad. Is this a chapter? If so, I feel that it was kind of short compared to what I define a chapter as. It was good, and kept me interested, but maybe some more description, imagery, or something along those lines could fill in the spaces. If you would just include a few mini paragraphs about that stuff in between some of the dialogue, the final product would turn out very nicely. :)

So, yeah, look into what I said. This has potential! :D

Keep up the splentacular work!
Peace out!

These were autumn mornings, the time of year when kings of old went forth to conquest; and I, never stirring from my little corner in Calcutta, would let my mind wander over the whole world.
— Rabindranath Tagore, The Cabuliwallah