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Young Writers Society


Reviews from a Marine (Re-opened)



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436 Reviews



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Sat Nov 14, 2009 10:01 am
AquaMarine says...



Done! Hope that I helped. :D
"It is curious how often you humans manage to obtain that which you do not want."

-Spock.


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Sun Nov 15, 2009 1:02 am
imapoemperson says...



This is the newest story that I am writing~
Thanks!
~Poem
Last edited by imapoemperson on Mon Nov 16, 2009 2:48 am, edited 1 time in total.
"We played Pin the Tail on the Reason My Life Feels So Insufficient, and nobody won." -Megan Moriarty





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Sun Nov 15, 2009 3:07 pm
anima9 says...



okay. i see you as probably one of my favorite mods right now. i edited the whole thing completely. I now have two versions.

This is the first version in which I edited after you posted your very helpful review:

topic54410.html

This is the second, much vaguer version. I made it shorter and with less detail because I wanted to tease my audience. I want them to be curious since I felt that the first version was too detailed and too well informed that it may bore my audience making them think "this is cliche, I ain't reading".

anyway, here's the new version topic54545.html

again, every correction you give me gets me one step closer to actually finishing my story. with that, I appreciate your efforts and time in reviewing. thank you :)
http://fatedblue.wordpress.com/

FOR PEOPLE WITH LESS THAN 3 REVIEWS: MUST READ

You MUST make a review of at least 3-4 works BEFORE posting your own. Otherwise your works will get unnoticed. So please, upon reading this, REVIEW!

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Sun Nov 15, 2009 10:33 pm
Young gun says...



topic54181.html

thanks
Too bad we don't live to experinece death





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Mon Nov 16, 2009 5:44 am
Fruits_Basket99Tohru says...



Hi, I'd like a review on my 1st story--Topic 54552.

It's based on a video game for Wii called Super Smash Bros. Brawl, (SSBB for short) so if you haven't played the game's Adventure Mode and if you haven't beaten Tabuu yet, then know that my story is one huge spoiler. :P And it'll be extremely confusing if you haven't played Adventure Mode.

OK, thank you! I'm not sure if you know about SSBB, but...worth a try right? :)
"We're all born with selfish desires, so we can all relate to those feelings in others. But kindness is something made individually by each person...so it's easy to misunderstand when others are trying to be kind to you."
--Fruits Basket Book 1, page 134

Do you need a review?





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Mon Nov 16, 2009 2:32 pm
AquaMarine says...



Done Anima's and Young's!

Poem, you deleted the link from your post, so do you still want me to review it?

I'll have a go at yours tomorrow Fruit (sorry, NaNoWriMo!), although I've never actually heard of SSBB so it could be very interesting ...

:D
"It is curious how often you humans manage to obtain that which you do not want."

-Spock.


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Mon Nov 16, 2009 11:48 pm
Nutmeg says...



Hello! :D Um, I was wondering if maybe you could please review something for me...? :'D I saw a few pieces of your writing and I thought they were simply beautiful, so I was sort of hoping an experienced writer like you could tell a newbie like me how I was progressing. ^.^;;

It's a Kingdom Hearts fanfic (not quite sure if you've heard of that fandom... XD): http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic54340.html

I'd really appreciate it if you'd bless me with the simplest of reviews! Thanks so much. :smt001

- Nutmeg =3
"I pray for the day when a chicken can cross the road without having its motives questioned." - A dear friend of mine ♥

- Nutmeg =3





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Tue Nov 17, 2009 2:48 am
xLogan says...



Back to Square One (2) - the second part of my story, topic54556.html

Back to Square One (1) - the first part of my story, topic54389.html
"People are afraid to die, but are also afraid to live."

[•_•]
robot fayce





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Tue Nov 17, 2009 8:55 am
AquaMarine says...



I'll do all of those today. I haven't actually heard of the fanfic thingy but I'll do the best review I can.

~Amy
"It is curious how often you humans manage to obtain that which you do not want."

-Spock.


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Tue Nov 17, 2009 3:17 pm
AquaMarine says...



Ok, so yours is done Nutmeg, And Logan's first chapter is done; I'll do the second tomorrow!

~Amy
"It is curious how often you humans manage to obtain that which you do not want."

-Spock.


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Tue Nov 17, 2009 5:43 pm
Kamas says...



*botherbotherbother*

As no one seems to ask for my reviews, I'll come ask for some myself.

It's a very short Other Fiction piece.

http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/post622037.html#p622037

Also can you tell how to do the 'here' thing with a link. I'd really like to know xD
"Nothing is permanent in this wicked world - not even our troubles." ~ Charles Chaplin

#tnt





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Tue Nov 17, 2009 8:24 pm
AquaMarine says...



I'll have to do it tomorrow Kammie. But it will definitely be done!

And the url thing? I totally asked the same thing in the lounge once so here is your answer!

~Amy
"It is curious how often you humans manage to obtain that which you do not want."

-Spock.


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Wed Nov 18, 2009 2:49 am
xLogan says...



Okay, thanks, Marine!
"People are afraid to die, but are also afraid to live."

[•_•]
robot fayce





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Thu Nov 19, 2009 6:47 am
AquaMarine says...



Logan's is done! And Kammie, I was going do attempt yours this morning but then realised that I probably wouldn't do my best review at 7am. So expect it tonight :D
"It is curious how often you humans manage to obtain that which you do not want."

-Spock.


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Thu Nov 19, 2009 9:04 pm
irishfire says...



Hey Aqua!

I saw you reviewed for my friend and was wondering if you could do one for me!

This is for thechocolatewritingcat's prompt contest and the prompt was "A beggar who likes to hear himself sing" and I think I did ok with it but I would love another review before I turn it in!

viewtopic.php?t=53907

please grit your teeth with my grammar and everything, just point it out and I'll kill myself for it later. xP

Thanks so much Aqua!

♥'s

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