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Camp NaNo '23: SSED Revisions



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Tue Apr 11, 2023 4:07 am
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Spearmint says...



4/10: 4

Wasn't feeling up to writing new scenes today, so I just read through chapter 4 and fixed things for consistency. Usually I post lines that I wrote that day, but seeing as I didn't write much today, and that I'm still liking the dialogue between Sunny and Robert when they first meet Eniac... I'll just post that. =P

The robot floated over to a wooden gate in the fence next to the house and rapped on it with an arm. "Eniac? It's me, Robert, with a guest."

There was silence for a moment, then without any warning, a head of electric-blue hair popped up over the fence. Two narrowed eyes squinted down at Robert and Sunny. "Eh? You're going to rob me of my quest?"

Robert muttered, "I hate repeating myself. Especially when I know he understood me the first time."

Sunny decided to step in with the speech she’d thought of on the ride there. "Hello! My name is Sunny, and I and my trusted sidekick Robert are on an important quest to retrieve the error descriptions. Esteemed error guardian, would you kindly lend us your aid?"

Robert huffed indignantly. "Excuse me, I'm not your side–"

Sunny elbowed Robert.

"And we're not retrieving anything right now, we're just gathering info–"

Sunny elbowed him a little harder.
mint, she/her


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=D
  





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Tue Apr 11, 2023 3:10 pm
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Snoink says...



ROBERT! <33333333333333333
Ubi caritas est vera, Deus ibi est.

"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly." ~ Richard Bach

Moth and Myth <- My comic! :D
  





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Tue Apr 11, 2023 5:51 pm
Spearmint says...



XD ROBERT!!
mint, she/her


.--. / ... ...- -.-. .-.. / - .--. ..- .- / .--- --- ...- .--- / .--- --- .--. .-- / .--. .--- .-.. / .--- -.-- .-.. .... -
=D
  





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Wed Apr 12, 2023 5:52 am
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Spearmint says...



4/11: 5.1

I've been making comments on my doc for scenes to add... I think I need to have Sunny solve a problem relating to the Conditional River. And have the errors pop up earlier. But eh, that's in the next chapter part, so I won't worry about it today. >.>

The error guardian was firmly looking down at the counter. He rubbed an invisible spot off the marble.
mint, she/her


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=D
  





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Wed Apr 12, 2023 10:23 am
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Liminality says...



Yay for consistency edits! And a problem around the Conditional River sounds interesting <.< Somehow that area in your story always reminded me of games where you have to get through a maze, but you're in a first-person POV, so it's a matter of remembering left-right-right-left-left . . . and so on. The extract is also a nice description! I can picture that gesture.
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Wed Apr 12, 2023 6:31 pm
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Spearmint says...



:D Ooh interesting! I hadn't thought of it that way, but that's a neat thing to be reminded of. xD Thanks for the comment, @Liminality! ◊
mint, she/her


.--. / ... ...- -.-. .-.. / - .--. ..- .- / .--- --- ...- .--- / .--- --- .--. .-- / .--. .--- .-.. / .--- -.-- .-.. .... -
=D
  





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Thu Apr 13, 2023 6:12 am
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Spearmint says...



4/12: 5.2

Started the problem scene (cleaning up some extraneous code), but didn't finish... Ugh, I have three major tests tomorrow and two quizzes on Friday. XP But then it's Spring Break, so I can finally see my desk under the piles of homework !! (trying a new metaphor instead of "light at the end of the tunnel," don't mind me xD i get rambly when it's late)

They had just jumped over a narrow stream when Sunny spotted a black patch, around twice the size of her spread-out hand, floating in the river. As they approached, the patch resolved into lines of text that were tangled together.

“What is that?” Sunny narrowed her eyes.
mint, she/her


.--. / ... ...- -.-. .-.. / - .--. ..- .- / .--- --- ...- .--- / .--- --- .--. .-- / .--. .--- .-.. / .--- -.-- .-.. .... -
=D
  





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Thu Apr 13, 2023 1:53 pm
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Snoink says...



GOOD LUCK!!!!
Ubi caritas est vera, Deus ibi est.

"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly." ~ Richard Bach

Moth and Myth <- My comic! :D
  





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Fri Apr 14, 2023 5:30 am
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Spearmint says...



4/13: 6.2

Thanks, Snoink!! The tests went pretty well. :]

Drafted a little more of the code pollution scene and finished looking over the rest of chapter 6. (I think my bookkeeping got messed up somewhere? Because turns out that yesterday I revised 6.1 but wrote down 5.2 in this thread... I have no idea when I actually did 5.2. Lol. >.>)

“Well,” Robert started doubtfully, “extraneous code in the river usually gets washed away and ends up in a landfill. Untangling it by hand is quite tedious, so it’s easier to do nothing and just let it decompose naturally.”

“I refuse to do nothing.” Sunny searched for a stick along the ground, then used it to reach into the river and pull up the snarl of code. The letters dripped murky water as Sunny lifted the clump onto the dry bank.


Chapter parts left to revise: 12 (though I still need to write some scenes in previous chapters)
Days left: 17
mint, she/her


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=D
  





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Fri Apr 14, 2023 3:56 pm
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Lael says...



You’re doing great with your progress! These excerpts are making me look forward to reading your story even more
"And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
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Fri Apr 14, 2023 6:06 pm
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Snoink says...



Ahhhh I love that new snippet!!!
Ubi caritas est vera, Deus ibi est.

"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly." ~ Richard Bach

Moth and Myth <- My comic! :D
  





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Sat Apr 15, 2023 1:29 am
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Spearmint says...



Ahh thanks so much, Lael and Snoink!! =D
mint, she/her


.--. / ... ...- -.-. .-.. / - .--. ..- .- / .--- --- ...- .--- / .--- --- .--. .-- / .--. .--- .-.. / .--- -.-- .-.. .... -
=D
  





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Sat Apr 15, 2023 4:54 am
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Spearmint says...



4/14: 7.1

Due to some unwise time management, I am typing this on my phone, at an airport. Sooo yeah, just made some minor edits to 7.1…

Sunny turned to Robert. "Robert. Dear, sweet Robert. Would you happen to have any money on you?"
mint, she/her


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Sat Apr 15, 2023 5:32 am
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Snoink says...



Lolololol. What is his answer???
Ubi caritas est vera, Deus ibi est.

"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly." ~ Richard Bach

Moth and Myth <- My comic! :D
  





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Gender: Female
Points: 22538
Reviews: 245
Sat Apr 15, 2023 11:45 am
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Spearmint says...



Robert rolled his eyes, then reached into a compartment on his side and pulled out some blocks that had a metallic shine to them. He pushed them over the counter.


XD
mint, she/her


.--. / ... ...- -.-. .-.. / - .--. ..- .- / .--- --- ...- .--- / .--- --- .--. .-- / .--. .--- .-.. / .--- -.-- .-.. .... -
=D
  








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