Stop and Stare (Part 22)

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What's happened in this novel so far:

Spoiler
Austin, Charlie Black's friend, is responsible for accidentally stabbing and killing Aimee Cardle. A few weeks had passed after the stabbing when the boys met Zoey and her friend, Beth. Aimee Cardle was Zoey's sister. They all met up again some time later, and it was organised that Charlie would be homeschooled by Zoey's mum, Sophie. Throughout this, Charlie and Zoey began getting to know each other better.

After Charlie kissed Zoey for the first time, she told him about her sister's death, and Charlie realised that she was the girl Austin killed. Charlie then upset Zoey because of what he discovered, but afterwards, he managed to get her to forgive him. The day ended with them kissing.

Charlie, Austin and Zoey are currently on the cliff where Charlie and Zoey first kissed. Charlie went into the forest to get Zoey a blanket. He came out with a memory box his mother used to keep, and Zoey is now scanning through its contents.





Stop and Stare ~ Part Twenty-Two





Charlie

I never should have brought the damn thing out of the forest. I should have just grabbed the blanket from it, then put the box back under the rock. When I gave it to Zoey, I figured that she’d have a shuffle through the stuff inside, but I had no idea it would have made me feel like my chest was gradually swelling up. I hadn’t even touched the box since Mum died, let alone searched through it, and merely watching Zoey doing so was forcing my pulse into overdrive. I glanced at Austin and was thankful when I noticed that he hadn’t turned around at all yet, and was still chucking stones into the sea.
There was a bright look on her face as Zoey scanned her way through the photos I purposely hadn’t looked at in five years. They were too... happy. It didn’t feel right. Worse still, out of all the photos she could have showed me, she had to show me that one. I could see it clearly in my head. There was a bold smile on Mum’s face, but in her eyes was something else entirely. I wish I hadn’t been so bloody stupid at eleven years old because I might have noticed that before it was too late, before the day ended.
“Did you draw these?” Zoey’s voice snapped me back to the present. She was pointing at the drawings in the box.
“Yeah, I did that one last Wednesday actually,” I said, nodding at a picture I made when I must have been something like seven.
“Wow, you’re quite the artist,” Zoey replied, laughing.
I chuckled, but it ended up sounding a bit dry. The photo she’d showed me a few minutes ago was still playing on my mind. I tried pushing any thoughts away as Zoey continued questioning me on the contents of the box. At least she’d moved on from the photos. I explained to her that the teddy belonged to both Will and I when we were kids, that the blanket was one given to Mum by one of our old neighbours, that the books contained a collection of my favourite stories back from when I was little, and that the stones were things Will and I had collected from the beach overtime. It was all pretty boring to me really, and it made my stomach roll just to look at as thoughts and memories crept into my mind, but Zoey was mesmerised by every last part of it.
“What about this?” She was holding up the pocket watch. Before I could answer, Zoey had started talking again. “Wait, is it what your mum had around her neck in that photo I showed you? Actually, I think you’re wearing it in some of the photos.”
“Uh, yeah,” I replied. “Mum used to wear it a lot.”
“How come she doesn’t wear it anymore?”
Our conversation turning into one about Mum was the last thing I wanted. I should have thought before I brought this tattered box out.
I started stammering, but I managed to give a reasonable answer, and one that was actually true anyway. “She gave it to me when I was younger 'cause I really liked it.”
“Why don’t you wear it then?”
Because it feels wrong after what I did. “I just don’t wanna lose it, I guess.”
“I suppose that makes sense. I think you should wear it though; it’s really pretty, but not too girly if that’s what you’re worried about.”
I slowly took the pocket watch out of Zoey’s hands. “Nah, I’ll end up losing it. Besides, I probably wouldn’t wear it anyway, so there isn’t much po--”
“Austin!” A sudden yell caused both Zoey and me to snap our heads towards the opening of the forest.
It was as though my tongue fell to the bottom of my throat as two recognisable figures sauntered out of the forest and onto the cliff. Wearing what was blatantly a knock-off Hollister t-shirt was Lee Pritchard, and ambling beside him was Jax Swain. When Jax came into view, I felt Zoey lock her arm around mine as she edged closer towards me. Austin jumped up and turned to the two rats.
“Bloody hell, mate, you could’ve told us to meet you somewhere that doesn’t take a genius to fricking find!” Lee laughed as Austin wandered towards them.
Austin had invited them here? Was he bloody insane or something? Zoey was with us, for Christ’s sake. I froze. Zoey was with us... She had no idea who Lee was, that he was her sister’s boyfriend, that Jax was there when Aimee was killed... that I was there, that Austin was the one who... did it. And we were all here at the same time. I felt sick.
I watched in distress as Lee and Austin began chatting, and it wasn’t hard to tell that Austin was avoiding looking at me. As they continued talking, Jax spun around, then locked his eyes onto Zoey and me. A large smirk grew on his face and he was soon power walking towards us.
“Shit, Zoey, close the box,” I ordered Zoey, and she did so faster than I thought was possible.
I shoved the pocket watch into my pocket, then moved the box so that it was hidden behind the large rock I’d been leaning on. To my relief, Jax didn’t seem to have noticed our speedy behaviour and he had soon sat himself down right next to me. I hadn’t seen the pillock since that night at Vertigo, and I was more than glad of it too.
“Look who it is.” He nudged my arm hard, then winked at Zoey. My God, I wanted to throttle him already. “You two ain’t, like, a couple, are you?”
Um...” I tried.
Zoey quickly intervened with a hardness in her voice. “Yes.”
The bluntness of her words caught me off guard slightly. Neither of us had gone right out and said that, or even anything like it, but hearing Zoey say that now tugged my lips upwards. I guess she really did like me then. My thoughts briefly turned to Will and the deal I’d made with him, but I easily removed him from my head.
“Ew, why are you with him? He’s a faggot.” Jax interrupted my thoughts. Never heard that one before.
“That’s funny coming from the boy who got beaten up by him.”
“Zo!” I shot her a glare.
She was being surprisingly confident right now, and I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing. After she’d spoken though, Jax more or less snarled at her, and I felt her body stiffen as he did so. Her grip on my arm tightened. Okay then, maybe she wasn’t as confident as I thought.
“He just caught me off guard, that’s all. He’s had plenty of practice from his old man anyway.” Jax sounded passed defensive, and my chest tightened at the mention of my dad in front of Zoey. “Besides, who says gays can’t fight?”
“You know, the most homophobic guys always end up being the gay ones ‘cause they’re trying to be as anti-gay as possible. They reckon it hides their true feelings. I’m sure you’d know though.”
He shot me a dirty look. “Like hell. If I was a faggot, I’d have topped myself by now. It’s disgusting.” He scanned me with his eyes and the hardness on his face grew even greater. I swore he wanted to get into another fricking fight with me. “What the hell is that? Do you have a rash or something?”
I glanced down to where Jax’s eyes were locked. My heart nearly cracked my ribs open when I realised my right sleeve was pulled up slightly, leaving the red marks on my arms in plain sight. Like a flash, I shoved it back down. I was doing a crap job at hiding those cuts.
“Just an allergic reaction to something,” I muttered before turning to Zoey. “Zo, it’s nearly two, so you better get home for your dad’s... thing. I’ll walk you there.”
She easily caught on. “Oh, yeah. Good point.”
The majority of people would have probably guessed that Zoey and I were talking complete bull, but I guess Jax wasn’t the majority of people. As well as dressing like a neon chav, he was a lot stupider. He muttered something under his breath as we sprung to our feet, but he hardly protested. When I aimed a glare in his direction, his face paled slightly before he turned away. He so knew I could have beaten him up again if I’d wanted to.
Once Zoey was standing up, I grabbed the blanket and my hoodie from the ground. Jax had his gaze on Zoey, so I was able to secretly grab the box form behind the rock. In the matter of seconds, I’d wrapped the blanket around it. It was surprisingly unnoticeable. Before I had the chance to start walking though, Jax jumped to his feet, grabbed my arm, then whispered into my ear.
“You’re taking the gay denial to the next level now, ain’t you? I mean, you're going out with the dead chick’s sister.”
It was my turn to become pale now. Jax knew that his words had stabbed into me and left me breathless because before I spun around, he winked at me with a sly grin on his cocky little face.
“What did he say?” Zoey asked me once we were a few yards away from him.
“Nothing. Just him being an idiot, that’s all,” I replied as I held her hand in mine, but it struggled to comfort me in the slightest.
I swore I was going to kill Austin. It was as though after forgiving him for one thing, he managed to make something else moronic happen. As we neared Austin and Lee, who were now sharing each other’s fags while they chatted, Lee turned and stared at Zoey.
“Since when was she ‘ere?” he asked Austin. “You told me Black was ‘ere, but you didn’t say anything about some other chick. She looks exactly like... like my ex.”
He knew exactly who Zoey was. If what Lee had said didn't give it away, the way his voice was drowning in what sounded like panic mixed with annoyance did. Aimee was technically Lee's ex, wasn't she? I wasn't even sure why, but the thought shot a chill through my body.
The police had apparently tried to keep the identities of Zoey's family private, but they clearly hadn't done a good job. There were a number of people in my street who knew that Aimee was a part of the Cardle family, and I could easily bet that members of other streets knew that too. I glanced between Austin, Lee and Jax. In some way, it felt like every last one of us knew who Zoey was except for her. We stopped beside Austin and Lee.
“Sorry, I didn’t think you’d mind.” There was a splash of anxiety in Austin’s voice as he spoke.
“Hey, Lee!” Jax yelled from behind us. “Pass me some of the vodka you brought? I’m as thirsty as hell!”
“Yeah, sure!” With one last glare directed at Austin, Lee began searching through his bag as he headed over to where Jax was sitting.
“What the hell are you playing at?” I hissed once Lee was gone. “They’re complete pricks, to begin with. Are you going insane or something?”
“He has a point, Austin. That Jax boy is a complete creep.”
“Whoa, hang on. Look, I didn’t invite them. Lee invited himself, and he happened to be with Jax,” Austin argued. “I even told them to go to the wrong place, which is probably why they took so long to get here, but they still managed to find us somehow.”
“And you didn't think to just say no when he asked to meet up with you?” I raised my eyebrows.
“Not really... It is me we're talking about here mate. I don't tend to think before I do. Besides, I've said no to him loads of times before, and you have no idea how impatient the guy gets.”
It still didn’t make sense to me. If Austin had said that Zoey was with us, wouldn’t Lee have not wanted to come in the first place? Why didn’t he just say that? Then again, if Lee knew that Austin and I were hanging out with Zoey, I doubted he’d be overjoyed. Getting close to Zoey could mean that we were at risk of revealing the truth about the stabbing. Lee obviously wasn’t too stupid to be unaware of that. I was beginning to wonder if I was though.
Austin spoke again. “Hey, where are you two going anyway?”
“To get away from these creeps,” Zoey replied.
“You coming?” I asked him.
“Nah, I better not. They’ve only just got here, and they’ll be pissed off if I just leave now, especially Lee. I’ll catch you up later.”
Laughter echoed from where Lee and Jax were behind us, and each laugh felt as though it was slicing into my skin. I despised the thought of those two being here on this cliff. The same cliff I spent so much of my childhood on, the cliff that instantly made me think of Mum, and the one place that had such an air of innocence. They were ruining it, turning it into a pile of rock that made my stomach churn just to look at.
“You sure?” I asked Austin again.
“Yeah. Lee’s got booze, so I’ll be fine. I’ll be able to drown the sorrows of spending time with Jax Swain.”
I managed to smile at his response. “See you later then, I guess.”
Zoey followed with her goodbye, and we were soon making our way towards the forest’s opening. I couldn’t get off the cliff fast enough, and neither could Zoey.

#


“Seriously, Charlie, how does Austin meet these people?” Zoey said when we finally left the forest. “It’s so bizarre how he has ghastly friends like that, and then his best friend is, well, you.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.” I put my arm around her waist. “I dunno, that’s just Austin for you, I guess.”
Mum’s box was being carried under my other arm, and I had to admit that it was beginning to feel heavy now. Neither Zoey nor I knew where we were planning on going now, so I had no idea when I’d have been able to put it down. I didn’t like it not being at the cliff either, but it was a lot better for it to be with me and not anywhere near Lee and Jax.
We were strolling along the pavement of some street in Zoey’s neighbourhood, and the air around us was noticeably chillier now that we were off the cliff. My hoodie might have actually come in handy if it became any colder. It was currently draped over the box along with the blanket, which most likely added to the weight of the whole thing.
“Do your mum and brother still go up the cliff? Or is it just you?” Zoey asked as she rested her head on my shoulder.
“Mum doesn’t anymore, and Will never went up there really ‘cause he has an issue with heights. He was literally screaming the first time Mum took him up there. It was as funny as hell.”
“Hey, that’s mean.” She laughed. “Is he still... partially obsessed with me? It’s just that he’s been texting me... a lot, especially since he’s only had my number for two days. Why did you give it to him? Are you trying to damage me?”
As her laughter wound into my ears, and her questions entered my mind, an idea began brewing in my head. Will said that I had to get Zoey interested in him, but I mean, the guy hardly knew her. I was pretty confident that my part of the deal would fall flat if he decided that he didn’t even like her. Oh, this could work.
“He begged for your number, and it was getting creepy, so I gave it to him. As for him still being obsessed with you... oh, God, yeah. It’s scary. I haven’t even told him about us 'cause I’m worried he’ll cry or something.” I shrugged. “I reckon I know how to get rid of his obsession though.”
“Hmmm, really? And how’s that?” Zoey lifted her head back up to look at me as she raised her eyebrows.
“Go on a date with him.”
“What? You’re kidding?”
“Hey, let me finish,” I replied, laughing. “Go on a date with him and act like a complete bitch, or make him think you’re insane, or gross him out, although I doubt the last one’s quite your style.” I clicked my tongue. “Or I could let you know about all of the things he hates, so that you could do every single one of them on the date.
Zoey gazed at me for a while, and we continued ambling along the pavement as she thought. If Will was put off by her completely, I wouldn’t have had to worry about making him think I was trying to get Zoey to like him. He could hardly blame me if he ended up going off her. Silence still remained as we passed Zoey’s street. Her house was easy to spot amongst the others because there, quite literally, wasn’t a stone out of place, which I was sure was partly down to Zoey herself. Unlike my street, this one was so green and healthy looking. The gardens were well kept, the houses themselves were large and there were flowers dotted around like sweets sprinkled all over the green grass.
“Do you really think that would work?” Zoey finally said.
“Yeah, plus it would be funny. Even if I didn’t go, I’d be sitting in my bungalow, laughing while I thought about it.”
“It’s a bit mean though...”
“Nah, we’d be doing him a favour. He needs to move on. Besides, it’ll be less harsh on him if he ends up not liking you anymore rather than just being rejected.” I shrugged. “Go on, do it. I wanna see how long you can hack him for ‘cause I can’t do any longer than half an hour. I’ll be impressed if you can do longer.”
There was another pause, but this one was briefer than the last one. While Zoey was thinking though, the sound of birds tweeting disturbed what would have been a complete silence. It became rather annoying after a while.
“Okay then, yeah, I’ll do it.” Zoey started laughing again. “And I’ll try my very hardest not to fall in love with him, as much as I’m sure I’ll want to.”
“Perfect. I’ll see if I can organise anything with him when I get home.”

____________________


Click here to read STOP AND STARE (PART TWENTY-THREE)
I didn't know what to put here so I put this.




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Skins, you're posting too quickly for us!
And then on top of that you make it so that I can't find any nitpicks that are worth mentioning?!? How dare you. HOW DARE YOU.
I haven't read the middle of your novel, and for that I'm sorry. I will catch up, honest! I try and try and then you post a pretty new piece and well... here I am!
I'm loving the way Charlie has grown since the beginning of the book. You've really put a lot of thought into his character and I bet the tumblr account is helping?
Keep writing (but let me catch up a little).

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Skinsy, tis me!

I'm only reviewing because Nate told me to. Mouhahahaha *coughs*

Seriously, though. My question is this: Why did Charlie suddenly decide to bring Austin to this cliff, if it was meant to be his sanctuary? Couldn't it be his little secluded place, for him and Zo? Why bring Austin? And why hadn't Austin just said no to Lee and Jax? And how do they all know that Zoey is Aimee's sister? No one's met her before, right? How did they know?

I only just read the previous chapter, I guess I missed the memo. I do have a small issue with it. Austin knows of Aimee. Why would he 'taunt' Zo with a dead bird carcass? It just seems a little callous, although maybe I'm reading too much into it.

Other than that, I really loved this chapter. It was great, and I'm glad they are 'a couple' now. *girlish giggling*

Keep up writing! Faster! Faster! *Cracks whip*




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I've only ever detested two villains on a personal level. One, Obadiah Hakeswill from Sharpe. Two, Jax from this. My life will not be complete until I track him down and punch him in the face. >:(
Enough rage for one review, methinks. As you've probably guessed from above, you're great at writing characters that the reader actually forms sort of personal relationships with. I mean, I see the characters from this as real people instead of just words on a page, which is great.
Your character development is generally quite god, although I can't help but notice (and I'm probably missing something from the earlier chapters, I don't remember the finer details) that Jax seems to hate Charlie for no particular reason. Perhaps you could have one of the characters comment about this or something.
Jax's dialogue is pretty realistic though - a lot of homophobia there. I can't count the amount of times a day I hear people being called gay as an insult.
Also, yay, you said something about the cuts :3
And I feel kind of sorry for Will now, after reading the end. But it should be quite... funny, should I say, when it does happen.
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Goo's here as promised, Smurf!

Firstly, I agree with the points that Tanya raised, about Charlie bringing Austin to the cliff. You didn't mention before that they hung out there. I also agree about the fact that Lee and Jax recognised Zoey. I know you mentioned that the families identities were known by people even though they were trying to keep it a secret, but maybe you could add in a bit where Lee says how alike Zoey looks to Aimee. It'll add confirmation to the reader that he definitely knows it's her and it'll make Charlie panic, which you could expand on.

I did spot a few mistakes too, but I can't seem to find them now. They were only minor; one being something like 'oton' where it was supposed to be 'onto'. I think it's somewhere in the middle of this part. You'll spot it while proof reading, I'm sure.

I liked the reappearance of Jax and Lee in this part. It's nice that you're keeping the recurring character's in the foreground, rather than letting them disappear for ages at a time before using them again.

I'm so glad that Charlie and Zoey are officially a couple now. That part made me grin like a mad woman!

Sorry for the lame review, but this is just so darn good!

Goo :)
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As they continued talking, Jax spun around, then locked his eyes oton Zoey and me. A large smirk grew on his face and he was soon power walking towards us.




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Hey, Skins. Here to review.

I've read the last two parts, but I am not going to review them as such. So, here I go with this one.


When I had given it to Zoey, I had figured that she’d have a shuffle through the stuff inside, but I had no idea it would have made me feel like my chest was gradually swelling up.
This looks more better.

Yeah, so this chapter was fun. There was seriously fun to it, and I did like the sudden change of atmospheres. You know, at one time he was so wrapped up in his thoughts, the other Jax and Lee caught him suddenly out of guard, and then there he was devising a totally evil plan to get his brother away from Zoe. You know, it was like a full on power drive. You know, the story paced forward. That's what probably made me like this chapter even further.

As for your writing, I can't express how great it was. Since I always do a crappy job at expressing my emotions in this forte, I'd rather shut up and let you know that I really thought it was a wonderful job done. I think there you have a knack of expressing everything in detail without making the whole thing look boring. Many a time writers overdo with everything which makes their readers feel drowsy, but you are not like them. Or otherwise some of the writers just leave behind small things which can make up a novel and that's why readers don't like it much. So


I just wanted to talk of the whole Austin telling Lee and Jax thing. As mom(Tanya) remarked, I too think it was a bit callous on his part to reveal this secret moreover when he knows that it could maybe jeopardize Zo and Charlie's relationship with each other. And being the sensible person he is, I was really left confused as to why would he do such a thing. Maybe we are explained of the reason in the next installment, but if not, then I really think you should think over this point.

Besides this, I do have one small problem to share. You know Charlie's been show as this bright musician in the novel, right? That's from what you've told us. Of course he is working his ass off to pay his music fees but I don't think that's alone enough to show his 'determination' towards music. You did show how he made up with Zo by singing her a song, which no doubt was so romantic. But I really think there should be more to his passion. You know, people who have troubled lives always try to find solace in some sort of creative work, art or anything. If we both be troubled or depressed we might like to write down our thoughts, write some story, etc, because that what we are. Writers. So similarly for Charlie, shouldn't it be his music? He could sing, play guitar when he's really disturbed? Like some of the days when his dad really pisses him off? I'd really like to read about that aspect and like you to reveal more of his musician's side. :wink:

G'luck for the novel,
Mia
"Next time you point a finger
I might have to bend it back
Or break it, break it off
Next time you point a finger
I'll point you to the mirror"

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Hello hello! Here for a review, though I doubt I'll be of much help.

I realize that you kind of need to introduce Zoey to the other guys to kind of start bringing the revelation to a head...but it felt a little forced and confusing here. Part of this could very well be from my bad memory, since I now recall that Jax has already met Zoey, but I wasn't sure about Lee. And the way that he says, "she reminds me of my ex" seems a little unreal. I'd think he would say that she reminds him of Aimee, and actually use her name, since that's what he's used to calling her. It feels like he has enough presence of mind to avoid saying Aimee's name around Zoey, but he's not smart enough to avoid mentioning the fact in the first place, so it kind of contradicts each other.

It really bothers me that those two creeps are on Charlie's special cliff. I'm not sure how they found it, if Austin told them to go to a completely different place? Does this mean they've been spying on Charlie or something? It seems a bit thin, that they were somehow able to find this hidden place, unless there's some explanation further on that I have yet to read. In which case, just ignore my rambling.

I'm looking forward to seeing how the date with Will goes. ^_^ I'm really hoping Zoey can pull it together and put Will off of her, and that she doesn't end up falling in love with him or anything. *shivers in anticipation*

All right, I'm off to the next chapter!

Cheers,
~Hawk
There are two kinds of folks who sit around thinking about how to kill people:
psychopaths and mystery writers.

I'm the kind that pays better.
~Rick Castle



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