Blunt Emotions

writeitalldown wrote:

Tired of long-sleeves
in the summer;
[b]and feeling nothing,
but alone.
Hoping that each day
will get shorter,
as they fade away.
Wave good-bye to the
dreadful past- I think that this should be a comma.
nothing but
bad memories
and shattered glass.
Blood stained emotions
and hidden tears
etched beneath my skin
stained vibrant red
to prove my pain,
and the pain of life.
Sick of forced emotion
and self-affliction,
nothing but pain.
[/b]

This was good, and filled with emotion, which you portrayed beautifully. Kade some minor corrections and comments on what I think will make this poem better, and I hope that they help. I can't wait to read more of your work.

Very touching, yet no fancying around, that's very impressive.
This work is exactly the type I'm looking for when shuffling, short, fun to read, and not (vocabulary wise) difficult.
I don't know if it comes from a personal pain of yours, but if it is, then I'm sorry for whatever loss of yours- if it isn't I just made an idiot out of myself, nevermind.
Anyhow, a lovely, heartbreaking poem, you should be really proud.
Keep writing.

This is filled with emotion. I love it keep on posting for the good of the world!♥