Of Love

I am a fool to doubt my feelings,
To pray and hope for what can’t be.
Upon the dark and stormy evening
I saw you once and ever since
My soul has lost its wings,
My mind lost all reason.
A bird caught in the mortal thorns of love.
Release the pain, oh fair maiden.
Unchain my heart and let me fly again.
For I have tasted flight and now forever
I’m doomed to watch the sky but walk the Earth.

/

I really enjoyed this piece. I like where you say

Vettan wrote:I am a fool to doubt my feelings,

because it is what most people go through. Good job with this, Keep writing

Do you ever have those moments where someones words speak to you in a different way that they speak to others? THAT is the kind of poetry I look for, and you hit it on the nose!! Like writer4lifee said, I loved the first line, "I am a fool to doubt my feelings." But the one line that really spoke to ME specifically (which is also, like, the story of my life) was the second line: "To pray and hope for what can't be." All in all, though, this poem was very thoughtful. I was a little unsure of the usage of "oh, fair maiden." That seemed a little over-the-top. But the rest of it put words to the feelings that many thousands of people in this world. Well done!!

I love the emotion that you put into this. I feel like I can really connect with the character. Feeling that way isn't the greatest feeling in the world, and a lot of people have a really hard time expressing themselves if they feel that way. I think you hit it dead on though.
Overall, I thought this was really great.

Keep Writing!

-Jalmoc

I liked this very much. I wish you would've continued it. My favorite part is "I'm a fool t doubt my feelings". We are all fools when it comes to feeling.