Yea it probably does. Hopefully not Pirates of the Caribbean later either :O That's part of the novel problem I need to change things around so it's not so familiar with those movies.
Woo! It's always interesting reading these sorts of diary things.
This may just be me, but I kind of like having things not quite explained to me at first. So, I like being a little confused at first... confused, but excited to finish the story, if you know what I mean! In this chapter, you pretty much told us about the place, which is cool and everything. The problem is, her voice doesn't really come out. Why does she want to talk about the place? Is she interested in human history? Why? She said that she hated the place, so why does she hate it? Basically, I want to know her opinions. She peeps out sometimes. Like, she'll talk about books and such and how she likes reading about everything because otherwise she's too bored. But, sometimes it seems like she just wants to narrate the history. So, I want to know why she wants to do this.
Also! Where are these history books coming from? If these places are submerged, the books are going to be ruined, be they on computer or be they in book form. What's going on here?
Ubi caritas est vera, Deus ibi est.
"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly." ~ Richard Bach
Hi! I really like it! It's a good start, and comparing to other reviews, I agree that it is like the little mermaid. It is just a little confuzing at first, but I don't know how to suggest you change it. I can't wait to read more!
-Titan
-Titan4ever "A day without sunshine is like, well, night."
