The Christians' Lie

Yeah, I know some Christians that are like that to me and I am a Christian. So, I know what you mean. The poem is very good...

A. S.

Very nicely written. and coming from an extremely Christian boy I have to say that those May not be Christians whom you described. The World has given Christians a bad name and its not even The Worlds fault. It's ours, Christians hardly act truly Christian anymore. Where in the bible does it say 'shove thy word into thy throat'? your poem made perfect since to me and many other. Very good job on touching onto a sensitive subject that really shouldn't be sensitive at all. Like the ABR song Mariana's Trench, "but our swords are shoved deeply in our thoats" many Christians' sword are shoved into their own throats.
Anyone feel free to message me about anything, or for my testimony:)
- Deify

Well let me just start off by saying I commend you on your theme. My religious themed poems always turn out like rubbish, but this is quite good and written well as a story or cautionary tale.

I really like the ambiguity of the narrator from start to end.

"mumble the prayer" I liked this, I could easily picture him kinda turning his head and mumbling it. Great word choice.

"As if he were brandishing a sword in their face," I loved this because it so well captures the feeling! Many times when I confront a Christian on their beliefs they put up their shields the same way.

"his type" I think you really portrayed the discrimination that one of the most disliked minorities faces. Not just with this quote but throughout, which must be an accomplishment considering you're a Christian.

The last stanza was really a strong and convicting end. Remove the italics blocks and your good. [i]

Umm... I'm sorry :p I'm about to go against a lot here, and say something that's probably a little harsh.

I liked the poem the way it was before (and the original title too.) As Taletypist said it was hard to tell which end of the spectrum it was written from, which, I think, gave it an all around unbiased point of view.

But of course you have to be brave to write about religion, because you're always going to offend somebody, there's always someone who will turn the thread into a place to state their own beliefs, and there's someone who will hold prejudice against your work by assuming your work is prejudiced.

Remember that whilst accepting critisism you've got to stand by your own reasons and principles that you had in mind when you made the piece. When I look at this now it seems like it's been overly edited and diluted to suit the critisisms that you have recieved.

I really liked the original. It was sharp, and stood out a lot. I guess it's just up to you whether you want to keep to your own style or write to suit the majority.

I was clicking around on YWS and you title caught my attention. I figured it would be just another person bashing people's beliefs, but it's not. I can feel the emotion that you have put into this, and I find it simply amazing. As a Christian myself, you made me think about my life with Christ. I have had trouble with proving God is real at points with people, and I was very ashamed. I also see the bashing of the people that don't believe the same, and I find this stupid. Love the person, hate the sin I always say. Anyway I have friends just like yours, and I would die for them any day if they would get saved, but I don't force it on them. Oh well that's about it.

-Flower-

Hey,
it's been a long time since I've done a review. But I'll try.
Not only was that a good peice of literature, I think we can all learn something from this too. This is a very deep poem that, if anyone is willing to understand, will challenge the way we react.

WOW!!!!!

You have obviously never known a real Christians.

hmmmmm... Fascinating. I myself am Catholic. I do know lots of people who claim to be Christian and don't really know what that means. Your poem summarizes perfectly what many people are like in this world; they fear the unknown. Well done I thoroughly enjoyed this. Splendid job.

``greyson``

I love the feeling of this poem and the idea behind it, but there are a few parts where the rhythm seems forced. Other than that, it was good. I can identify with it.

Also, Catholics ARE Christians.

I agree with Tenyo 100%
from what I can tell, the original was much better. Taking this as one of those topics where everyone has to shove their opinion in, unless it's a grammar/spelling/capitalization mistake: Do not edit it. Simple.
Because then you're piece of work will become others, not yours.

As far as your poem goes, I really liked it. It opens up our eyes on how some people behave like this. However, don't think who or what you wrote about is a Christian. Because anyone can call themselves one, but it takes a true one to be one. Call him a "fake" if you must, but I stress that from any angle you look at him, he is not a Christian.

Christianity isn't about being born holy, or having Christian parents, or living in a fancy house. It's about accepting God with all your heart and truly fearing him.

Great job, keep up the good work!

The emotion in your writing is something to be admired. Emotional writing is the best way to write I believe so on that I tip my hat to you.
However, as a Christian I have to admit a bit of distaste in this, yet there is some truth that there are a few that exile the non-believe. And that itself is ungodly. To condemned others is to condemn thy self I believe.
And as for a reason for there being a God I say to Chris that everything in this world is unknown until it is felt.
Truth and false are just words used to manipulate ones mind yet once you are able to feel the truth of something you can believe it. Such as love, you think you know love but you don't until you feel it. And thats how it is until you feel God and know he is truth. No one can tell you or save you its a one on one with you and God.
Find your path out of the dark and you'll find your Way2Dawn.
Good luck!
-Dawn

Hi there.
This poem was really put together well. I am a full believer in Christ and i know that he loves every one no matter what they believe. The people in your poem are not proper Christians, they didn't treat Chris the way he was ment to be. Loved.
Keep writing, message me if you need anything.
Dacoozed

This is really telling of life. I am a Christian and I have seen this happen so often its crazy. Im not putting the religion down or anything but I think that you put a powerful message into a powerful poem. I liked it, although Im new and I dont know how much my liking it really matters, but I thought I would tell you. Keep it up.

ashlyn