Please Remember Me
“Does it hurt?”
So soft, without blemishes or any scars. I finger it lightly, running my thumb across the delicate face. With my other hand, I reach down and tug lightly upon the silky raven locks, watching as chestnut brown orbs peek out under long eyelashes.
“Are you hurt anywhere?” I ask quietly, fearing I could break this comfortable silence with anything louder than a whisper.
He gave me a smile, small but content, which I returned half-heartedly. I slowly lowered my hands to cup his face, but dropped them when he flinched.
“Sorry,” I say.
He smiled at me once again, more open this time with twinkling eyes.
“Don’t,” I hesitate to say. “Don’t look at me like that.” I turn away. It’s my fault this happened to you. I feel a pull on my sleeve, but
did not react on it. Instead, I clench my eyes tightly together, forcing the tears back and choking down the sob.
“Why are you so stupid?” Unable to resist the urge, I take a glance at him and watch as he plays with his blocks, making small happy sounds each time he made a new discovery; how unusual for his age, yet so right for his condition. “How can you still like someone who hurt you so?” Not like, but love. Love. I shake my head, getting rid of the old passing memories of us.
I kneel down before him and sat on the back of my ankles. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to push you,” I whisper, observing him as his innocent eyes lit up and he gave me a wide smile, which I painfully return. “I’m sorry,” I mutter once more and he turns away from me. I really didn’t see it coming, if I did, I wouldn’t have pushed you. My fault. My fault.
I let out a shaky breath and lean back against the wall. “How can you forgive me?” I chuckle, sounding a little insane, even to my ears. “You don’t even know, not to mention remember, what I did!” I drop my head into my hands. “Why can’t you remember? Is it because you can’t, or because you don’t want to? Is it my fault?” I glare into my hands. “What am I thinking? Of course it’s my fault. You wouldn’t even be in this state if it wasn’t for me!”
To see him like this is unbearable with renewed naivety proved by loss memories was almost worst than seeing the accident itself take place before my very eyes.
“Please forgive me.” Forgive me. Forgive me. I gripped my head. He doesn’t even remember who I am. Me. Me. The one who he said he treasured the most, before it happened.
I felt a pull on my hair and I looked up. He gave me a questioning look, wide eyes and all. I sighed and reached out my hand to pat his head. He ducked his head as he flushes in embarrassment. I tugged him into my arms and held him tight, tucking his head under my chin. I want us to go back to how we were before. No more silly arguments, just you and me, together; forever. So please come back.
“Please remember me.”
