A small breeze breaks the deafening silence of the room, making the army-marked letter rustle around on the desk. She glances over in its direction, her eyes falling upon the rose and shirt. Slowly, she stands up and walks over to the shirt and donning it, goes to lie down upon their bed that is now only hers. Wrapped in his shirt, she wraps herself in the memory of when it wasn’t just her…it was them.
~~~~~~~One Year Ago~~~~~~
A man sat laughing surrounded by friends at a local college café. His eyes were creased in the corners and dimples bordered his wide smile. She couldn’t help but stare at the sound of his laughter. It was a deep guffaw, causing his entire body to vibrate. She started to pay more attention to the stranger than to her own boyfriend who sat across the table from her. The boyfriend was talking, no, more like complaining, about one of his professors at the university. She stopped even trying to pay attention; she only had eyes and ears for the stranger across the room. The sun sparkled in his hazel eyes, she noticed, and glinted off his brown blonde-streaked hair, giving him a halo in the light. All that was missing were the wings. Something started to prod her arm and a voice broke through her thoughts.
“You’re not even attempting to pay attention, are you?” her boyfriend said.
“I’m sorry Bobby, I’m just distracted. I’m gunna buy more coffee, you want anything?” she asked.
“Naw I’m good…maybe the coffee will help wake you up,” he gave a sarcastic little smile.
She stood up and walked over to the counter and ordered a medium vanilla coffee. Right before she grabbed it from the counter, she felt a light tap on her back. She turned and was about to yell at the tapper in frustration when she saw it was the stranger.
“Hey, I think you dropped this,” he said, and handed her wallet.
“Thanks,” she said.
“Are you new here?” he asked, “This is kinda the place to be, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen you here or around campus.”
“Yeah, I just transferred schools.”
“Cool. I’m Lee, by the way.”
“I’m Allison.”
“Well, it’s nice to meet you, Allison.” Her name seemed to roll of his tongue, sending shivers down her spine. “I’ll see you around.” He made it sound like a promise when he said it.
“Bye…Lee,” she whispered as he walked back to his table, collected his friends, and departed the café.
As he left, all she thought about was the way he had said her name, and how his eyes were better than hazel, they were two separate rings of green and brown, making them golden. The Golden Boy she thought, and walked back to her own table with a smile on her lips.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Wetness on her face causes her to open her eyes. The salty tears form dark stains on her pillow, the one place where she allows them. Taking a deep breath to try and calm down, her mind goes off on a tangent. Exhaling, there was a soft knock on the door.
“Allison, sweetie, can I come in?” A voice sounded from behind the door.
She wanted to say no, to yell at him to go away, but she couldn’t. Her voice was with him, so her brother opened the door and walked in.
“Do you want anything to eat?”
A shake of the head signaled no.
“Something to drink?”
Another shake.
“To talk?”
Suddenly the choking hold around her throat loosened and she slowly sat up to look her brother in the eye.
“What do you want to hear about?” she asked.
Her brother stood there with a shocked expression on his face. He hadn’t been expecting her to actually speak.
“Whatever you’re willing to tell me.”
Taking a deep breath, she began to talk.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She had been walking into her first class and immediately she noticed him. The golden boy, she thought to herself. He was doodling into his notebook, not paying attention to the girl eyeing him. The next thing she noticed was that there was one seat left, and it was right next to him. Butterflies started fluttering around and she carefully walked over to the desk and sat down, turning up her music to try and drown out all other sounds…including the possibility of hearing golden boy’s voice. Because even that was enough to send shivers down her spine…but it shouldn’t, it couldn’t. She was going out with Bobby…she was in love with Bobby…maybe. She felt a tap on her shoulder. Looking over she saw it was golden boy.
“You like tapping people, don’t you,” she said.
“It happens to be one of my favorite pastimes actually,” he said back with a grin. “You’re Allison, right?”
“Yeah, and you’re Lee.”
“That’s me,” the grin was still on his face, “Do you mind if I ask what you’re listening to?”
“A Drop in the Ocean by Ron Pope…it’s my favorite song”.
“I love that song, actually all songs by him. It pisses me off how he’s so good but no one knows about him.”
She stared at him with surprise. No one else she knew had even heard of Ron Pope, let alone one of his less popular songs. He continued on without noticing her expression.
“I think that Ron Pope is good for when you need to relax, but in general I’m more of a Red Hot Chili Peppers man. How ‘bout you?”
He glanced at her waiting for a response.
“The Red Hot Chili Peppers are ok, but Incubus will always win over them.”
“What are you talking about?!? Red Hot Chili Peppers school Incubus any day. R.H.C.P. is responsible for introducing the world to an amazing blend of classic rock and funk.”
“Sure, they did that, but Incubus took that to the next level. They managed to combine so many different instruments plus a DJ to create an amazing sound. Now it’s my turn. What are you drawing?”
He showed her his paper. It was a partially drawn rose.
She was impressed. “If you can draw like that then what are you doing in philosophy?”
“What can I say, I like to think things out. Now, back to your unfortunate music views.”
They continued to banter back and forth until the teacher eventually strolled into the room and yelled at everyone to be quiet. After class, she immediately shoved her ear buds back into her ears and more or less ran for the door when she once again felt a tap.
“Again with the tapping?” she asked.
“What can I say, it’s the only way to get your attention. I swear people in Japan could hear your music right now. I was wondering if you wanted to get coffee, but after the way you were basically sprinting out of here, I’m going to guess the answers no.”
The butterflies started up again, but worse, much worse. She wanted to say yes so badly, but she, couldn’t. It wouldn’t be fair to Bobby.
“I’m sorry I can’t. I have to go meet my…boyfriend.” She thought for a second, “Let me give you my cell, maybe we could meet up tomorrow since we don’t have class.”
A smile played on his face.
“That would be great.”
They exchanged numbers and started for the door. Right before turning opposite ways, golden boy looked at her.
“Goodbye, Allison.”
His expression was serious but in his eyes was the spark of a smile, a smile that never seemed to go away.
“Bye, Lee. I’ll see if I can call you tomorrow.”
“Sounds good to me, See you around.”
Now she had her own smile. “The golden boy isn’t so bad,” she thought, “Bobby isn’t going to like this.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Her brother had a look of awe on his face.
“Wow you guys really hit it off,”
She nodded and spoke the first words besides telling the story, “It was a spark that I couldn’t put out.”
“How did Bobby take it?”
“Like this…”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And she was right when she thought that Bobby wouldn’t like it, it was definitely more than not like too. Sitting in the car with him the next day, it had been borderline freaking out.
“Why are you meeting this guy you barely even know!?”
“Because he’s a nice guy, and I just transferred here. I’d like to have other friends besides you.”
“I understand that. But why him?”
She was becoming really pissed off. Luckily, they were in his car and not in a public place, otherwise it could become extremely messy.
“Bobby, I know this isn’t about him as a person, it’s just because he’s a guy. I’m with you and I plan on staying that way, but you need to stop being so freakin’ controlling. This isn’t even the first time you’ve flipped out about me hanging out with another guy.”
“What, I’m controlling because I don’t want MY girlfriend to go off with a guy that she doesn’t even know. That’s called looking out for you, not controlling.”
“I can’t believe this! We’ve been together for over a year and yet you still can’t trust me? Fine, don’t trust me, but I AM going to meet with Lee!”
“I do trust you, it’s just…” A look of defeat was on his face. “You know what, whatever I don’t care. Do what you want.”
Bobby appeared really upset. She looked at him and felt bad; this was their first fight. She didn’t realize that it would be the first of many to come.
“I have to go, I’ll call later,” she said, and then opened the car door and left him sitting alone.
She started walking to the café where she first ran into golden boy. It was a beautiful autumn day for taking a walk. The air was cool and crisp, with yellow and red leaves falling to the grown from their summer perch. All around her were the sites of people enjoying themselves while not in classes; throwing Frisbees, sitting and talking under trees, eating a late lunch; everyday normal activities that seemed completely out of place with what was going on in her mind.
She didn’t know how she felt about Bobby anymore; it seemed that ever since she transferred to his school he’s been growing more stressful every day. She didn’t know how much longer she could take it, or if it was even worth putting up with anymore. And then there was Lee. Even though they’d just met him she couldn’t deny the spark between them. She didn’t want to have to pick between the two. She thought that maybe Lee will turn out to be different from what she thought now. Maybe the spark would die, or maybe she was just trying to find something in Bobby that just wasn’t there anymore.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She had stopped talking.
“Wait, so that’s it? You just dumped Bobby?’ Her brother asked.
“Kind of, it was more of a mutual split.”
“And then you and Lee…”
The pained expression on her face warned him to stop talking. She turned away from him and curled up in a ball on her bed.
“I didn’t realize that you really loved him.”
He glanced around the room and spotted the letters, including the army-marked one on the floor, and the black rose. Standing up, he walked over to the rose, picked it up, and laid it next to his sister.
***************************
That black rose lay next to her from that day on no matter or wherever she went, it was a reminder of the promise that the golden boy had left behind, a final gift to her along with his last face-to-face words with her: No matter where I am, just look to the ocean and hear my voice in the waves, feel my kiss in the suns warming rays, my arms around you in the wind, and in the beauty of this rose, remember the beauty of us.
