For snoink... Part 1

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This is a little teaser to see if Snoink likes it... xD

Little Billy never knew he was 'thpethial' 'till his daddy came home one day with a badge that said: "I'm thpethial." His chicken mince was just cooling down when Spongebob decided to buy Patrick an ice cream.
"I'm going to buy you an ice cream Patrick," Spongebob said.
"Okay, but then we can go to karate, right?" Astro boy inquired.
"Nooooo...? Sice when were you in this parody of ninjas vs. Spongebob vs. evil pirate squirrels?"
"Since I put on this Squaid infected squirrel costume?"
"Oh... M'kay!"
Bobby, wait no, Billy ate his mince in silence as the three random men argued in his mom's apartment.
"OMG! Look a jelly fish has been sent by James Blonde for the pirate squirrels!" Astro boy yelled.
"Pikachu," Pikachu exclaimed.
"You're right, my nose would fit in there, but we don't have time for knock knock jokes! We need to get those ninjas and pirate squirrels...!" Spongebob calls.
Suddenly a pile of short, short tempered, short nosed ninjas jumped out and made Astroboy squeak.
"We come to steal the boy's chicken mince!" One said.
"Never!" I screamed.
"Hoya!!!" another quacked.
The room was filled with ninja noises until Astroboy brought out a platter full of num nums and tea.
"I brought num nums and tea!" He said. Everyone cheered. They ate in complete ignorancy ans the pirate squirrels came and stole their jelly.
"We stole your jelly!" they shouted.
"Damn! We must Hire Jane Bond to help us defeat James Blonde and the P.S's!" I holler.
"This shit is banana's B-A-N-A-N-A-S!" Gwen Stefani said.
"Yeah!" Spongebob agreed.

"So I see you are in fact a sponge, and you only have your learners liscence... So I'm gonn a give you the biggest laser powered, rocket guns on the side, with cup holders, jeep anyone has ever seen, EVER!" the car dealer said. Spongebob just did the Wiggles finger wave and said: "Aww yayuh!" Astroboy walked over to the Slushie Dawg and bought a milkshake.
"I just bought a milkshake," he said.
"You can't drink that though, you're a robot..." Patrick replied.
"I'm a real boy!"
"Na ah!"
"Yaha!"
"Na ah!"
"Yaha!"
"Na ah!"
"I hate you."
"I love you too, Astroboy."
After Spongebob forced Astroboy and Patrick to make up, the pirate squirrels showed up with a very, super awesome, evil surprise. Spongebob did a triple back flip and landed, making no attempt to justify his pointless stunt. A P.S. copied Spongebob, but it attacked someone instead of just landing.
"I want my jelly back, Squirrel-san!" Spongebob pressed.
"Never!" the lead P.S. retorted. Spongebob scowelled.
"Jane, use your super spylet moves to give the squirrels boo boos!" Jane did. The sqirrels left, giving Spongebob his jelly back.
"Now, Spongebob-san, we must get Jane to kill James Blonde." Astroboy informed.
"Oui." Spongebob replied.


To be continued...

Things you might need to know.

P.S. = Pirate Squirrel.

Jane = Jane Bond.

James Blonde = Mock of James Bond.

The car Spongebob bought = SUPER CRUSHER pony car!
Last edited by whatevr on Mon Apr 05, 2010 12:35 am, edited 2 times in total.
Literally whatevr




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Good start, good start... but you need more destruction and stuff. This is simply not a finished story! This is the introduction! You need:

- Deepening conflict.

- A resolution of sorts.

- The resolution fails... more conflict!

- More conflict!!!

- OOZING OF CONFLICT

- CONFLICT IS ABOUT TO EXPLODE

- A revelation

- MORE CONFLICT, LIKE ZOMGAZZZZZZZZZZZZ

- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH CONFLICT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- Resolution!

- More resolution!

-Total butt-kicking time!

- Sarcastic witticism.

- Happy ending.

Oh... and you also need much more ninjas... but you knew that. ALSO. ALSO. Because you're under the sea and stuff... maybe you can add an underwater James Bond sort of fight. That would be AWESOME! And then there is a nuclear explosion! And then ninjas come out!

So keep on going, Mr. Biffle! You're not done yet! :P
Ubi caritas est vera, Deus ibi est.

"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly." ~ Richard Bach

Moth and Myth <- My comic! :D




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edited...
Literally whatevr



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