How to Receive a Gift- <old work, hardcore criticism?>

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This is almost 6 years old, and Iwant to rewrite it and make it more than a piece of crap but I would like it torn up in the critique department first, please. And thank you. <3

_~*~_


First, please consider who is giving you the gift?

WARNING//: This is very important, if the person giving you a gift is a person you know you cannot trust or that you know has alternative motives, bless yourself and politely refuse. If they insist, refuse again. No matter what the gift is, refuse.

I. First, if you have been offered a gift from a person trying to make amends, before accepting, consider if the gift is sincere; or, is the gift a peace bribe. Secondly, if you were in the wrong, realize how desperate this person is to have things be better. If the gift has personal or deeper meaning, seriously consider returning one in kind. If a person gives you a gift of something that they prized, say, a memento of sorts, return it after you are done appreciating it, and perhaps offer them a gift with importance to you.

II. Now, if someone you do not know offers you a gift, seriously consider the motive. If it's a stranger trying to befriend you, think of what kind of relationship that will become. Do think of what it means, not of what it is. Remember, in the end the choice is up to your judgment - judge wisely.

III. If you have a casual friend or coworker give a gift, it is not likely to be personal. It is likely something given in mass to multiple others, such as impersonal friends and other coworkers. A thank you and a smile should do.

IV. On to a place more difficult, when a good friend offers you a gift, you will realize that it is to receive. It's easy to consider yourself worthy of a menial or temporary prize, and it isn't so easy when someone close to your heart gives a gift from their heart. You may even feel guilty or unworthy, or maybe shame or that you must repay them with a gift yourself. These concerns rob both people in the party. Don't feel guilty, a gift brings joy to the 'giver' when they see a 'free joy' of receiving on someone they love's face. If you feel that you MUST repay them, simply be thankful and accept their love.

V. Now, when 'the someone' you love gives you a gift, that is the time when it is hardest to know what you feel about it and how to react. You may act undeserving, refuse the gift because it was 'too much', or may quickly give them a gift in return. Instead, show them how much it means, how amazing it is to you that they are 'giving' to you, and most importantly, share with them the joy of getting something without paying/working for it.

Truly, the best way to receive a gift is to show joy. It rewards the giver and lets you enjoy your gift, receive a pleasure, and appreciation. Do NOT act false, but think about the thought that went into your gift.

To receive what was not 'bought' for yourself is the most humble of things.

To receive something you didn't earn, could not earn, is humbling but it should also bring a happiness of getting something.

To say you don't deserve or have not earned is irrelevant, but it can make the giver lose the happy balance that comes from giving, for truthfully, the fact they are giving you something makes you deserving. Accept it.

The receiver is always deserving in the heart of one who loves them. Enjoy your gift. You are somebody's favorite person.

VI. Feel good.




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Mandorelute, this is not bad. But in my opinion the Roman Numerals aren't needed they are extra and you can get your point across without them. Is this an essay? It sounds like one, you should try and get it moved to Non-fiction.
"Do NOT act false, but think about the thought that went into your gift."
This bugged me, italics might work, but the capitalization is a little much.
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First, please consider who is giving you the gift?

You don’t need that question mark, make the sentence a command.

WARNING//: This is very important, if the person giving you a gift is a person you know you cannot trust or that you know has alternative motives, bless yourself and politely refuse.

Why is “warning” written like that with all the slashes? It seems wrong.
WARNING//: This is very important, if the person giving you a gift is a person you know you cannot trust or that you know has alternative motives, bless yourself and politely refuse.

Your grammar is a bit off. It should be something like, This is very important. If the person giving you a gift is person who you know you cannot trust, or that you know has alternative motives, bless yourself and politely refuse. However, I’m not sure why you should bless yourself, and wouldn’t “ulterior motives” be better than “alternative motives”?

I. First, if you have been offered a gift from a person trying to make amends, before accepting, consider if the gift is sincere; or, is the gift a peace bribe. Secondly, if you were in the wrong, realize how desperate this person is to have things be better. If the gift has personal or deeper meaning, seriously consider returning one in kind. If a person gives you a gift of something that they prized, say, a memento of sorts, return it after you are done appreciating it, and perhaps offer them a gift with importance to you.

Uh… I’m slightly confused as to why you’re telling me all this. I was going chunk-by-chunk, but after this part, I read it all the way through to see if there was a surprise “woo!” at the end and, rather to my disappointment, there wasn’t. I’m not sure why you wrote this. It’s just… weird. I mean, you’re telling me how to accept different gifts from different people, but why do I need to know this when I already know it, and if I don’t know, I’ll find out without too much pain by myself?
I know this sounds mean, but it’s not meant to be; I’m genuinely confuzzled.
"TV makes sense. It has logic, structure, rules, and likeable leading men. In life, we have this. We have you." -Abed Nadir




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I kind of agree with the person above me. Also, because I am a wholly conceited person, I never feel extreme guilt or unworthiness when receiving a gift from anyone.
I think this could be a humorous essay-thing where you talk about really, really, really, absurd gift-giving situations and how to handle them.
Like unnamed packages at your doorstep, on the windshield of your car, from someone claiming they're your long lost brother, from someone claiming you've been accepted to a school of witchcraft and wizardry...
Because what you have right now is an etiquette essay that seems to inject your unique philosophy on gifts which is like a really beautiful decorative bowl. It's wonderful to observe but doesn't summon emotion and can't be used for that many things.
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