Forgive me for getting deep and personal with this topic. (Eh, if you don't like it, don't read it. Practice the 1st Amendment.)
I used to think love was being willing to die for someone or maybe even not being able to go on without them. But after I escaped from an extremely disfunctional, self-destructive relationship I thought different.
I was more than willing to die for this person. Yes, I thought I wouldn't make it without them. Well, I did think I loved this person because of this. And then I discovered how easy it is to die. To die and claim a cause. So easy to dedicate your own death to just about anyone if you wanted to. I realized just how damn easy it was and decided that this couldn't be the definition of love, or at least not the definition I wanted to believe in.
After a full year of soul searching, I've came to this conclusion:
Love is giving the person countless amounts of acceptance. Giving them encouragement to choose the path they want. Letting them share their shames and regrets and not judging them for it. Giving them space for themselves and only themselves if they ask for it. Supporting them when they want to love someone else. Hearing their truths even if it means you'll lose them. Holding them if they hit rock bottom.
And above all:
Expecting nothing in return.
This is the only kind of love that there really is and I understand this now.
I remember how much it used to bother me when I'd hear of a couple divorcing because one of them has a problem; be it alcoholism, gambling, spending money, whatever. It didn't make sense to think that they had stood in front of the alter, stating their vows and "death do us part", "through sickness and in health", "through thick and thin"...all to end in the worst time, the exact time when love is expected to overcome. Maybe I'm not with my times but I would expect love to especially last through times of hardship. Isn't that what it's for? Not sex. Not making babies. Not for your damn entertainment. Well I fully understand now why love never made much sense to me. It's only after we get a taste for it do we come to understand it, I believe.
love is... amazing. But its a bit like a firework.
Goes off with a bang, glitter, bright colours, interests you and holds your attention... and then it can fizzle out.
Unless its those long-lasting ones on Harry Potter that Fred and George Weasley made?
lol,
depends on whether it's unrequited or not. If it is unrequited love sucks and is ridiculously painful.
if it's returned then it can be wondeful.
One of my favourite analogies is 'love is like the wind, you never know where it's coming from, or when it's going to come. But when it hits you...you're swept away.
Love is a waste of time. Biases your judgement, makes people act like fools, can have terrible consequences. Wouldn't Spiderman be better off if he didn't love MJ? No liabilities, nothing that could be used against him. He'd be free, nothing to hold him down. But he does love her. What happens? She gets used against him. Gwen Stacey, another girlfriend? She gets killed and has the Green Goblin's children. Green Goblin Juniors fight Spiderman. Recipe for lasanga.
In real life, love can have terrible consequences: revenge, jealousy, distrust, breaking up of friendships, etc. I'm well aware that love can be a good thing, and I have absolutely nothing against marriage (hey, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for marriage!) but I just feel that it isn't for me. I might change as I get older, but that's how I feel now, and I have no desire to change.
-ST
"TV makes sense. It has logic, structure, rules, and likeable leading men. In life, we have this. We have you." -Abed Nadir
Love is something which i didn't fing yet.....lolz
"A good plot is like a dream.If you dont write down your dream on paper the moment you wake up,the chances are you'll forget it and it'll be gone forever"-Roald Dalh.
