Magic for Dummies

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Before I begin, I'll just make a few notes:

*Firstly: this story is 98.7% not serious, so don't take it too seriously, it's just for fun. Plus, it's all my writer's block will let through right now.
*This was written for school.
*Also ... it is not anything like what I usually write. Usually I write serious sort of fantasy (well, you know, quests and what not). Usually first person present tense drives me up the wall, unless written very very well. Usullay, I don't write modern fantasy. And it's not planned out, like all my other stories. I have a vaugue idea where I want to go and that it's it ... big risk for me, when I don't have an outline I tend to lose track. So ... I don't know. This is very different from anything I've written since I was eleven.
*This isn't all of it, I didn't want to burden people with the whole thing at once. I might post more, depends on people's reactions.
*I'm not looking for extreme grammer checks (although if you wish to do that, it's fine by me) I'm more interested in how you much like it. If it amuses you, if it's the most annoying corny thing you're ever read and it made you spew, or if it was just OK. That might take one more sentence and three more brain cells then "Great work, keep it up!" no matter if you liked it or not, please, I want honesty.

Well, that's pretty much all I wanted to say. I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

***

"I wasn't though!"
Well, I was, but it would be best if Mrs Salmon-Wilkes didn't know that.
"Honestly!"
"Sally Semmel, how many times have I told you not to disturb the class?"
"Several hundred," I say, like always. "But there was never any evidence ..."
"Except for the time you kicked Peter Henderson and ten people sworw they saw you? There was that bruise on his shin too. You mean appart from that?"
"Well, yeah ..."
"Or the time I found your finger prints all over the empty lolly jar?"
"They could have gotten there any time!" I protest.
Well, they could have, they just didn't. I should have used my pixie magic to wipe it clean, but I didn't because I'm no good at magic.
"Since when have I trusted you near that lolly jar unsupervised, young lady?"
Someone sniggers up the back. I throw everyone in the area a dirty look, but it's the popular 'bad' kids sitting there, so they won't pay any attention to me. They sit there so they can lean their chairs back against the wall and make pen-shooters where Mrs S-W can't see the, I still make pen-shooters, but only being a geeky 'bad' kid I have to sit near the front and get caught.
"Right," says Mrs S-W when it becomes clear I'm not going to argue. "I've had enough of this, you're staying in all lunchtime."
"For passing notes?" I say, outraged, but Vic cuts me off before I can continue.
"Mrs S-W," she says in her best reasoning-with-teachers voice. "It seems a little extreme to keep us in for a simple case of passing notes. Wouldn't it be a more suitable punishment to read the notes out to the class?"
There are one or two "yeah"'s from the back of the room. It's shameful the way eleven-year-olds would ratehr throw classmates to the cats then pass up the chance of some entertainment.
"I was only going to keep Sally in, dear," sasy Mrs S-W, smiling like a sweet old granny.
It doesn't matter what Vic does, teachers like her.
"But now you mention it, I think I'll read the notes too." Mrs S-W snatches up the page of messy scrawl, and turns her back on us so that she's facing the rest of the class.
I glance at Vic, unsure whether this is good or bad. You can never tell with Vic, she can turn the worst situations into victories. Her deep blue eyes gleam as one eyelid dips in a very slow and meaningful wink.
I grin.
It's common knowledge my fingers are the magical parts of my body, Sky knows Mr Clerke, the spells teacher, pulls me up front to demonstrate my incompetence often enough. Victoria Stillwell keeps to herself, so not many people know her magic is conducted by her eyes.
"Vic," Mrs S-W reads with barely hidden malice. "I don't understand question three, can you gelp me? Sure ..." she trails off.
A few people chuckle. I hide my grin behind my red-pink hand, just in time.
"You changed it!" Mrs S-W turns aroundm eyes cols and hard. "You did, didn't you Sally?"
I jump a little, and force a shocked expression to take the place of my grin before removing my hand, feining innocence as best I can. Technically, I am innocent, But my face has a nasty habbit of constantly looking guilty.
"Me? Change it?" I say meekly.
I'm acting away. Innocence isn't perhaps my most successful face, but it's one I've had the most practice at.
"I can see the sparks on it! They're only just fading. Admitt it, you did it!"
"Mrs Salmon-Wilkes, please," says Vic.
I risk I quick look at her. That sounded far too guilty for my liking. And ... oh no. I know that look. Her conscience is about to get the better of her.

***

To be continued ...
Oh, you're angry! Click your pen.
--Music and Lyrics




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Sorry. Didn't amuse me. But school creative writing assignments, I find, are often not as good as what you would normally write. I'm curious about what sort of school assignment would result in this, though.
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Well I liked it!!! And the rest is better anyway. I say its good.
~~Honary 11-year old~~

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hehe... this was very amusing... yeah... i'll be quiet now.




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I didn't think it would be your sort of thing, Rei. Well, the story I wrote for school kind of ends up with her seeing that teachers are people too (yes, I was writing what the teacher would want to hear) but ... I'm changing this version in places. But thanks for being honest.

Thankyou Anna for your sisterly support, and TBR for your ... *trys and fails to think of right word* ... support. It's good to get mixed reactions. If they were all bad then I'd think there was somethin wrong with me, and if they were all good I'd never improve.
Oh, you're angry! Click your pen.
--Music and Lyrics




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El, I love your sense of humour. Twisted as my own, I dare say ;)

says "to be continued".. have any more? erm.. pixie magic? eleboration coming, I hope, as that sounds rather interesting. And I know this sounds odd, but this sounds like you. Make sense? hehe popular bad kids and geeky bad kids - love that

but i have to agree, school creative writing assignments aren't as good as other things.. (take mine where I misread the word sock to say scock, for example.. now that was intersting).
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*grins* Yeah, I can't read/hear the word "sock" and have it be completely innocent anymore. Thanks Jack.. :roll:

Anyway, this was really cute! I can't wait to read more!
Love and Light




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I found that really funny, and i would honestly like to see what happens next, i spotted one mistake though

[quote]and ten people sworw they saw you? [/quote]

You just spelt swore wrong.

I thought thats a good start. I wish my school assinments were that interesting... I only got to read Jane Erye, you get to write.
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Grammar made your story horrible, but your story was funny.
juste essayer

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More will come .. when I'm allowed back on the internet (I'm supposed to be doing homwork now *whistles innocently*)

Sorry about the typos, I had to type it out from scratch because the original had to be written by hand, and then I didn't get time to check it.
Oh, you're angry! Click your pen.
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Ceylon wrote:Grammar made your story horrible, but your story was funny.

Oh. *is a little put out* I'd hoped my grammer was better than last time I posted (he he. I didn't know what a run on sentence was then). Well, let's see what I can find ...

sworw

Should be swore, I know, but it was only a typo.

"Except for the time you kicked Peter Henderson and ten people sworw they saw you? There was that bruise on his shin too. You mean appart from that?"

I need to make that bit flow better actually, now that I look at it ... but that's not really grammer.

where Mrs S-W can't see the,

Another typo, "the" should be "them"

ratehr

*rather

It's common knowledge my fingers are the magical parts of my body, Sky knows Mr Clerke, the spells teacher, pulls me up front to demonstrate my incompetence often enough.

Sky is supposed to be spelt with a capital, it's a god.

But that's all the bad grammer I could spot going over it. Well, from what I know anyway. So that reasons there are things I don't know, which means I need help ... so would you point out the stuff that made my grammer horrible to help me please? I'd love to improve if you'd like to help.

PS. It's the holidays now, so I'll get the time to post some more. I'm debating whether to post more on this thread, or start a new one for each entry to keep things fresh and uncluttered. Haven't decided yet though.
Oh, you're angry! Click your pen.
--Music and Lyrics




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Your humor was a little weak, but it was creative and fun to read. I think there might have been one or two typos, but who cares about typos? (not me). Just wanted to point that out. One thumb down and one thumb up! Don't give up!

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Way, way too many typos. Don't be sloppy with your work; double check it, always! Especially if it is for school. The typos distract me from other grammar and actual spelling issues, so once you re-read and fix those, I'll get back to you on the grammar issue.

I can't say it interested me, or caught my attention, but other people seem to enjoy it so maybe it is just me.
"Admitting that you don't like reading is admitting that you don't have an imagination." -- Broken Wings




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This was fun, but the formatting and grammar/ spelling mistakes made it hard to read. :? Otherwise, I liked it. I liked the difference between the popular bad kids and the geeky bad kids. Overall, it was moderately funny.

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Haha, I thought this was hilarious...Yet, I found a couple of spelling nitpicks...
"Except for the time you kicked Peter Henderson and ten people sworw they saw you? There was that bruise on his shin too. You mean appart from that?"

It should have been swore and apart..

"Since when have I trusted you near that lolly jar unsupervised, young lady?"

Hmm, I don't see a teacher saying "lolly"...

There are one or two "yeah"'s from the back of the room. It's shameful the way eleven-year-olds would ratehr throw classmates to the cats then pass up the chance of some entertainment.

It's spelled as rather....

"I was only going to keep Sally in, dear," sasy Mrs S-W, smiling like a sweet old granny.

It should be sassy....

"Vic," Mrs S-W reads with barely hidden malice. "I don't understand question three, can you gelp me? Sure ..." she trails off.

It should be spelled as help...

"You changed it!" Mrs S-W turns aroundm eyes cols and hard. "You did, didn't you Sally?"

Should be spelled as around...

I jump a little, and force a shocked expression to take the place of my grin before removing my hand, feining innocence as best I can. Technically, I am innocent, But my face has a nasty habbit of constantly looking guilty.

It should be spelled as feigning...

"I can see the sparks on it! They're only just fading. Admitt it, you did it!"

It should be admit...

I risk I quick look at her. That sounded far too guilty for my liking. And ... oh no. I know that look. Her conscience is about to get the better of her.

It should be "I risk a quick look at her"...

I loved this story and definitely think that you should continue it...So, great job and gold star for you!!!!!

fluteluvr77<3
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