Night

It's really hard for people to write in the style Meyers does because it is strictly unique. You captured Bella's depression perfectly, although it's hard to get into it without context.

Since I've read the book, I had my fill of the depressed-Bella description, so it was predictable, but again, you were dabbling in the field of inserts.

Try writing it into your own story? Mix it up alittle?

Alright! I felt like this was a great exemplar of what Bella would have felt had Steph written a detailed description of the moment in the forest! I especially liked this part

"Well, now she knows she was wrong. And she feels like she should have known all along. After all, he's the equivalent of a god, and what is she? A mere mortal. A foolish, stupid, ugly human girl.""


SOO relevant to the Twi Series!

YAY YOU!!!!! Great writing (although it'd be fantastique in 1st person!)

I'm actually an Alice fanGUY.

i liked it alot though i think it was, as others have said, a little predictable. But it was a well-written piece, nevertheless. good job.

Okay first:

equivalent of a god,
God
Make that g big!

Well as short as it is I do finally feel more sympathy for her. It almost seamed as though there was no hope at all.

I liked this one. You interpret her feelings well.

I liked it. I almost started to cry. (I'm super emotional like that.) I really liked Edward up until he left Bella, and he has yet to redeem himself in my eyes.
I'm so on Team Jacob.

I am such a fan of The Twilight series and it was really cool that you wote about it. I especialy like the way you never used Bella and Edward's names. Very cool!