Penguins of Antartica

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Penguins of Antartica

Penguin of North Antartica
Wanted to see his mama.
He packed his bag, rode on a sled
And waved goodbye to his friends.

Penguin of South Antartica
Wanted to visit the North.
With a sack on shoulder,
full of baked crabs,
A flip-flopping goes on as he set forth.

Both Penguins of Antartica
Skipped past a glacier.
They thought of an avalanche
And bumped into each other.




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This is really cute. I'd say "all his friends" in the last line of the first stanza for the sake of the rhythm.
I liked the part about thebaked crabs, but I don't think:
"A flip-flopping goes on as he set forth. " is quite right. It sounds a little odd. I get what you're saying but it could sound more natural.
I liked the last stanza. It made me smile.
"Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise."
-Maya Angelou




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Agreed, this was very cute :D Jasmine seems to have covered the errors and nitpicky things, so I'll just say an obligatory "awww, Penguins!" :D

Happy New Year,
~bubbles
Got a poem or short story you want me to critique?

There is only one success: to be able to spend your life in your own way, and not to give others absurd maddening claims upon it. (C D Morley)



For in everything it is no easy task to find the middle ... anyone can get angry—that is easy—or give or spend money; but to do this to the right person, to the right extent, at the right time, with the right motive, and in the right way, that is not for everyone, nor is it easy; wherefore goodness is both rare and laudable and noble.
— Aristotle