The Cra-yon Lay-onds: A Highly Experimental Piece of Writing

Aet Lindling · 2007-08-27T05:50:46Z

This is something... borderline insanity, very experimental... it's like modern art. Oh yes, and Gorrath: Part 4 is almost ready. EDIT: Okay, fixed it up as much as I could without losing the spirit. :D ------ The Mystical Hunt for the Lay-ond of the Cra-yons Maps are wondrous things, thought Matt, climbing the cliffs of eternal despair. So soon, he thought, I shall arrive at the crayon land! No... Cra-yon lay-ond. Yeah. He arrived. "ROOOOOOAR!" roared the roaring dragon, scientific name Draco Clamarius. Matt wasn't worried, however. He knew how to deal with such things. "What is your test, oh dra-a-a-gon?" "I shall seteth before ye alls threeitis cra-a-a-yons! Figure ye out which be non le poisoneeeyoooned!!!!" The roaring dragon coughed up three crayons and spat the three slimy colored sticks of wax on to the ground. "Now eateth one, ye punyious humanii!!!!!!" "YAAAH INDEED! Verily I shall, slimy mongeriel!!!!..." This was the proper way to converse with roaring dragons. Matt looked at them. He sniffed them. They smelt horrible, all of them. But then he suddenly had an idea. The dragon was tricking him. The dragon had coughed up the crayons from its own stomach! None of them could have poison, because the dragon would've died otherwise! "Dragooooooon!!!!! You tricky-WICKYNESS! None be PoIsOnIi!" "IF that ANSWER be YOURSETH, eat one RIGHT AWAY NOW!" Matt grabbed the green one and devoured it, sure of himself and smiling with confidence, leaving the red one and the orange one. "I sorry, HUMANII PUNYIOUS! But I immune to possssssion. that why i not DIDDIE!!!!!! When coughhhing up." "Uh-oh..." Matt said, clutching his stomach, his smile drooping and becoming a frown. A moment later he dropped down dead. The roaring dragon swallowed the other two crayons, and went off to find another crayon to poison and swallow whole. But, and listen careful-like, Matt neva woulda died 'ad 'e 'membered the most 'portant part 'bout cra-yon huntin'. When it comes down t' eating, an' ye know wun's poysuned... Always eat an orange. ALWAYS eat an orange. THE END ------ I have a second one, but I think I'll wait to show it until I know if this is too crazy or not. EDIT: I will. :) But first, Gorrath Part 4.

LowKey

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Sat Jan 05, 2008 12:35 pm

LowKey says... · Sat Jan 05, 2008 12:35 pm

This is the first time I've ever read a story, or seen anything that fits 'it was so bad, it was good'.

Wow. :shock:

But it was really, really funny. Man, so terrible... so ...painful... but so very, very hilarious.

You rock.

Necropolis SB / Necropolis DT

Once was Dreamer, is now LowKey_Lyesmith.

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.

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yoha_ahoy

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Mon Mar 03, 2008 3:51 am

yoha_ahoy says... · Mon Mar 03, 2008 3:51 am

I like your modern-art/writing style! Very um... stylish! Lay-ond of Cra-yons... it sounds like something my brother and his friends whould write if they were this brilliant.

"You tricky-WICKYNESS! None be PoIsOnIi!" -a favorite line...

"Always eat an orange." Hahahahaha!!!

*dies of laughter* Ok, I'm reading the other... 5? soon....

~Yoyo

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Rei

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Tue Mar 04, 2008 5:39 pm

Rei says... · Tue Mar 04, 2008 5:39 pm

Yeah, it was a bit silly for me, too. I'm sure you could keep the same spirit and still have some more descriptive details here so I could have a better visual reference to what it going on. I couldn't really visualize any of it, and when that happens, I can't remember what I've read even if it was only two minutes ago.

Please, sit down before you fall down.
Belloq, "Raiders of the Lost Ark"

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