Autumn's Beginning, Autumn's Breeze

Alise smiled and quickly rose to her feet, "i'm so sorry," she said, "I didn't want to have to change you, but you were going to die! I wasn't ready to lose you." She found herself using her hands in a panicked frantic way trying to get him to understand. She could feel the tears cloud in her eyes as she repeated herself, "i wasn't ready to lose you, I'm still not ready."

Gerard picked up her hand with the cut on it, "will this heal quickly?"

Alise nodded, "it will, in a few moments."

She watched as it closed itself up quickly, "does it hurt?"

She shook her head again, "hardly anything does."

He kissed her nuckles.

"Aren't you angry with me?" she asked, "I just got you killed."

Gerard-

"You have no idea how mad i am at you." I said sternly. She blushed and looked away.

"I-I'm sorry..."

I put my finger under her chin and lifted her head until she was looking me in the eye. "But i'm glad you did it. I didn't want to have to lose you, either."

I pulled her up and gathered her tenderly in my arms. I turned to look at my brother, who seemed rooted in the spot, too shocked to move or speak.

"Heh...erm... looks like you have a vampire for a brother now, Nat." I said, hoping my transformation hadn't hurt him too deeply and trying to make light of it. I worried about him. He was my brother, my twin. The only family i had left.

He only continued to stare.

I frowned. "C'mon Nat. At least I'm still alive...sort of. Be thankful your brother is still on this planet, and not in the afterlife."

Nat looked down, his brown hair covering his face. His words were almost too soft to hear, but they burnt a hole straight through my stilled heart.

"I have no brother."

With that he gathered Bella's form in his arms and vanished. Right before he disappeared, he looked me in the eye. All unspoken words were spoken. I saw fear, pain, confusion, rage, hate, love...then he was gone.

**Woah... I'm switchign to first person too, by the way**

When I woke up, I was in Nat's arms. THe world was spinnign around me, the trees disappearing.

"What's going on?" I asked, blinking a few times to clear my mind. "Where's Gerard, and Alise?" I felt Nat stiffen. After a few minutes of silence, I got worried. "Nat?"

"Gerard and Alise won't be...accompanying us any longer," he replied quietly, sitting me on my feet lightly.

"Why not?"

"I'd rather not say."

"All right, but you will tell me eventually."

"Later."

"Okay, later. WHy are we back here?" I looked at the large gate leading back into the Mage's tower place. They frightened me slighlty, although I couldn't say why.

"It seemed like a decent place to stay for now," he replied simply.

Nathaniel-

I brought us back to the room that it seemed we had just left. We met no one on our way, of which i was thankful.

I opened the door and Bella walked inside. I followed her through and shut the door softly behind me. Bella walked over to one of the beds and sat down, watching me with curiosity and worry.

I went over to a chair in the farthest corner of the room and sat down, drawing my knees up and putting my hands on them, my head resting lightly on top. I gazed out the window into the darkening sky.

Tears rolled freely down my cheeks.

*Bella*

I watched Nat for a few minutes, noticing the tears running down his face. I was certain that I wouldn't be able to comfort him, no matter how much I wanted to. He needed to be alone, needed to simmer in his thoughts. I got up slowly, walking to his side for a moment. I knelt in front of him, until I was eye level with him.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he shook his head no. "All right then. If you want to talk, promise you'll find me?" he nodded yes. "I love you," I assured him, kissing his forehead. I then stood up, and left the room.

"You wnat to take the test," a mage behind me said, following me closely.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I replied quietly, refusing to turn around.

"Yes you do. I could arrange it, if you'd like."

"No, I'd really rather not," I answered, getting slightly worried.

"All right...you'll come to me eventually though. If you don't, I'll come to you. You feel weak, useless compared to Nathaniel. You believe that taking the test will make you as strong as him, make you worthy of him. You're right. Taking the test will make you just as strong as Nathaniel, possibly even stronger. If you don't take it, he might begin to see things your way, and find a stronger, more capable mate." The mage assured me before disappearing with a small popping noise. I began shaking involuntarily, not knowing what to do. I sprinted back to the room, where Nat still sat. I fell onto the bed, breaking into tears.

Would Nat really leave me for a stronger mage? Would he love me more if I was stronger, like him?

Nathaniel-

I sat for a few moments after Bella left, too numb to move. Then awareness washed over me, and with that came a wave of panic. Why did i let her go off in this tower by herself?! I trusted these mages just about as much as i trusted a poisoness snake. I cursed myself quietly.

I had just risen from the chair, stumbling slightly, when Bella ran back into the room, sobbing. I watched her for a moment, stunned, as she fell onto the bed, her body convulsing in wracking sobs.

What had those damn mages done now?

I walked over to Bella and gathered her in my arms, rocking back and forth gently, letting my own tears flow unchecked down my cheeks. She buried her face in my bloodstained robes and cried.

"What's wrong, love?" i asked as gently as i could.

Bella~

I cried uncontrollably for a few minutes after Nat's soothing voice had asked me what was wrong. It seemed that his concern was only making my worries worse!

"Would you...would you..." I was gasping, trying to get the words out. I had cried so much that my breathing was no longer even. After taking a few deep breaths and forcing myself to calm down, I tried to continue. "A mage told me that if I didn't take the test you wouldn't love me as much becuase I wouldn't be as strong as you and you would leave me for a stronger mage who can take of herself better. He knew exactly how I felt inside, and..and..." I began sobbing agian. I knew nothign I was saying was making sense, and that it was almost pointless to try speaking.

Eventually, I managed one coherant sentence.

"Would you leave me if you found someone with more power than me?" I sobbed.

Nathaniel-

I mentally slapped myself on the head...hard.

"Bella," I said, barely concealing my laughter. Trust Bella to be able to make me laugh in even the worst situations.

"Look around you. Where are we?"

"The...tower...?" she said, confused.

"Exactly. And who...or what...resides in the tower?"

"Mages...?"

"Yes. And do you know how many of them are females, AND powerful than you an I?"

"...a lot..."

"Do you see me drooling over any of them?"

"...no..."

"Bella, i wouldn't leave you for the most beautiful, most powerful female in the world, because no matter who comes along, YOU are the most beautiful and powerful to me."

For some reason, i was suddenly reminded of my brother...or the brother i once had. Another tear flowed down my cheek.

Bella~

Nat was being so sweet...how could I have been so stupid? I resisted the urge to hit my head against the wall. Noticing that he was crying again, I reached up and wiped his cheek.

"Are you okay, dearest?" I asked quietly.

"No," he whispered, holding me close.

"Tell me what's wrong?" It sounded like a question, even though it was more of a request. I wanted him to tell me, becuase I wanted to help. I wanted something to destract me from my thoughts.

Nathaniel-

I sighed quietly, blinking to rid the tears from my eyes. I suppose now would be the best time to tell her...if there really was a best time...

"Gerard is... a vampire."

"What? How?"

"I'm not sure. I think he and Damian attacked each other and then Damian ripped...well, i wont go into details. But Gerard was dying, and Alise did what she could to keep him on this planet. So now he's a vampire."

"But why won't we still be traveling with them, then?"

"Because i don't have a brother anymore." i said quietly, another tear sliding silently down my cheek. I didnt remember the last time i had cried, and i dont think i had ever cried so much. Even when my mother died.

"You...disowned him?" Bella asked, horrified.

"It was for the best."

Gerard-

I stared at the spot where my brother had disappeared blankly, not believing what had just happened. I sank down into the grass. I felt Alise's presence next to me, but i didn't look at her. A tear, blood red, rolled down my cheek.

"I'm so sorry, Gerard..." she whispered in my ear. "I never meant for this to happen. I'm sorry."

I said nothing. Just stared at the ground with dull, dead eyes. Not even the welcome beating of my heart could comfort me now. I wondered if Nat felt this pain, too. No, he didn't, i was sure. For if he did he would have died already as i wished i could.

I collapsed into the tall grass, sobbing silently.

"I'm sorry Nat." I whispered between sobs. "I hope you can...forgive me...someday..."

"No Nat, it wasn't for the best! Do you realize how insanely ridiculous your desicion was?!" Bella was having one of her emotional moments. Nat sat silently, watching her pace back and forth in front of him. He wasn't mad at her for being upset; instead he just listened to what she had to say.

"No, I don't. Tell me," he suggested.

"Vampires cannot die! Gerard loves you, and without you, he will die. However, he cannot die. Hence, he will try to find some crazy way to commit suicide! And if that doesn't work...oh good lord. Why would you disown him just for being a vampire?" Bella sat back down, feelign a little better. She waited for Nat to speak.

Nathaniel-

As much as i hated to admit it, she had a point. Not about Gerard killing himself...but about my decision being ridiculous. In a way.

I knew Gerard wouldn't try and kill himself. He still had Alise, and he wouldn't leave her after she had saved him. But he would sulk, as was to be expected. He would be depressed for a time as was to be expected also. But he wouldn't find some weird way to commit suicide. Of that i was positive. He would find some way to find me and make it up to me.

I sighed. "I disowned him because... well, two reasons, really. One: Our own safety. He's a very young vampire, and he has no control. He could easily kill us both if he wasn't careful."

"And the other reason?" she prompted.

"I don't really want to talk about it..."

Alise comforted Gerard as best she could, she didn't try to justify anything either had done, she didn't make any noise at all.

When he stopped sobbing he sat up and embraced her, pulling her in tight. She hugged back pulling him tight too.

"Don't worry, we'll find him, everything will be okay."

Gerard said nothing but he shook his head disbelievingly.

"I know he's upset, and I know you're worried about him. But Bella's with him, they'll protect each other. We'll fix everything, we'll make him see."

...Nat's a bad boy. Bad Nat. Time out for you.


Gerard-

I sighed "I'm not necessarily worried about him. Just...i can't believe he'd...he'd..." i couldn't go on. The mere thought of his face as he disappeared left me feeling sick and helpless. I felt another tear roll down my cheek.

"I know, Gerard. But we'll find him, don't worry. I don't think he meant it. And even if he did, we'll make him see his decision was poor. Don't worry, everything will turn out right in the end. Just have hope."

"I do."