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I love it! Keep it up, Grif. It's hilarious!

Poor smaur.

Ha, Dono et al were in rare good form, weren't they? And Brad...that was a creepy Brad, Grif.

I did make him pretty creepy didn't I?

Stay tuned.

aye. creepy Brad. But quite amusing.

On a side note, I'm up-ing the rating here, 'cause of the nudist colony and Smaur on the table mention, mkay? feel free to make it higher, if this gets any eh... racier, ok?

*pokes* yes, you should make this your epic novel, or one of them

Technically, it's still clean because I haven't described anything. But the subject matter has gotten a little racy.

More action!

*head/desk*

I don't know whether I'm excited or terrified to find out what happens next.

A bit of both, perhaps?

Grif walked out of the hospital and looked out. The hospital felt so stifling, getting out in the open again was a relief.

"GRIF!" Areida said running towards him.

"Hi Ari!" Grif said with a smile. Areida said nothing, but kept running towards Grif. With a flying leap, she slammed into Grif, knocking both of them to the ground. At that moment, bullets flew overhead as a terrorist opened up from a passing car.

Areida wasted no time, she grabbed a pistol from her skirt and returned fire, striking one terrorist. The vehicle stopped and three more terrorists came out, firing AK-47's. Areida ducked as they laid down suppressive fire.

"Grif! I'll lay down cover fire, get in the hospital!" She yelled.

"What?"

"Get in the hospital!"

"I can't hear you over the gunfire!"

"GET IN THE BUILDING NOW!"

"WHAT?"

"GET IN THE- oh heck with it," Areida grumbled. She grabbed Grif and hoisted him over her shoulder in a super-human movement. The terrorists were dumb founded- she had emerged at the very moment the terrorists had finished their clip. Areida let off a quick prayer and tossed Grif through the doors before ducking behind them.

It was only a matter of time before the terrorists came through the doors. Areida locked the doors, breaking federal law.

At that moment, Incandescence was thrown against the locked doors. Areida and Grif looked up to see a very angry Smaur.

Something was wrong with her though... the flesh around her skull had been ripped off, revealing titanium plating. One of her eyes had become red. The truth hit Grif suddenly.

"Oh my god! It's Arnold Schwarzenegger!"

"Must... terminate... Grif!" Smaur said. Areida fired at Smaur, but the bullet just bounced off.

"This sucks!" Areida said.

"Target acquired," Smaur said, focusing on Grif.

"I don't think so!" Hunter, Dono, and Phoenix said. Phoenix carried a sniper rifle, Hunter carried a Gatling gun, and Dono carried a paint ball gun. Smaur turned around, only to get a paint ball shot into her red eye. Smaur stepped back; temporarily blinded.

"LET'S GO!" Areida said, shoving Grif to his feet. Hunter, Dono, and Phoenix followed.

They headed for the rear exit. Just as they came to the door, the door exploded open.

"GET ON THE GROUND! GET ON THE GROUND!" Jack Bauer yelled. They all did this, Areida tossed her gun over.

"Dono, we're here to escort you out of here to CTU," Jack Bauer said.

"Thanks Jack," Dono said. A CTU van was parked nearby. A team of CTU agents went ahead of them.

"Let's go!" Jack said. As they approached the van, it exploded, sending a massive fireball up. The CTU team was dead.

"Mr. Buchanan! My team is dead," Jack said into his mic. "Darn, Sanchez was the best quarterback since this series began," Jack muttered.

"JACK! WATCH OUT!" Phoenix said, shooting a terrorist. Thirty of them had shown up out of nowhere. Grif looked around. There were several kids on skateboards and a large hill.

"Skateboards!" Grif said. He knocked a kid off the skateboard and got on, heading for the hill. The others followed suit. The chase had begun.

I cant stop laughing. I really cant. I was fine until Jack showed up. So so funny.

Jack Bauer.. Jacko firestarter... ah! my brain can't handle that many Jacks!

Skateboards *mutters*

No wonder smaur would kill you! She doesn't like names capitalized, and you did just that.

In the history of absurd plot twists, skateboarding with Jack Bauer and a few YWS members while being chased by terrorists and a homicidal robot from the future would probably be among the sillier plot twists ever created.

The only thing sillier, Grif thought, was if he did a headstand on the skateboard.

"Ah heck, why not?" Grif said, doing a headstand on the skateboard.

Suddenly, a gigantic dragon swooped down! It was big, red, and it breathed flames out of it's nose!

"MAKE ME YOUR MASCOT!"

"AHHHHHHHH!!!!" Grif yelled outloud, sitting straight up.

His surroundings had changed. He was in a concrete structure, which, for all the glass structures and modern computers, still felt like a really weird place.

"He's coming to! The hallucinogenic drugs must have done the trick!" Grif felt woozy but was otherwise alive.

He recognized the room immediately, he was in Bill Buchanan's office.

"Welcome Grif, I'm sorry about the drugs, but you were ranting way too much."

"It's okay Bill," Grif said.

"And my name isn't Bill, it's Patrick." Grif's eyes had trouble focusing.

"Grif, I know that this is difficult for you to understand, but we know that you have trouble understanding the most simplest of concepts, so therefore you should be able to understand this one." Pat Buchanan touched a button and a slide show began.

"A while back, we began an operation known as "Operation Monkey Business." The federal government gave Nate the training and resources to make a writing site where we could recruit propaganda writers and ninjas. Unfortunately, we lost contact with Nate and his deputies a week ago. We believe you have information that might help us."

"Okay, what do you want to know?"

"I'm afraid it's not that simple. You see, we need to interrogate you for information, using torture and other weird stuff. Otherwise, we won't have as big a homeland security budget as we'd need to finish the story."

"What?"

"See what I mean about not understanding simple concepts? Jack, take him away to be interrogated."

"Ah nuts," Grif said.

Hey one thing Grif you forgot Dono other persona Quiz lmao. But great so far can't wait to read more.

heehee! So we're MIA, a secret government conspiracy... yeah. This is the stuff of genius.


But! Ah! "most simplest"? *smites* but I can see it as a character flawquirk so keep it.

Aye Carumba! Funny=understatement. I liked the bit with Gandalf best.

-ShadowTwit

Oy vey.