on command and control

'tis in iambic tetrameter :3

I love to see iambs my friend!!!

But also I love the rotating rhyme scheme and the alliterations are ON POINT. I'm so excited about this poem

hehe thank you @Ventomology!! am having fun playing around with sounds this napo XD

Hello hello mint!

to/too/two
> This one caught my eye! The image of two people giving a speech is interesting and tense. Maybe they feel outnumbered or like their words won't accomplish their goal, hence the desire to "copy paste me".

undere
> I like the refrains in this one - I think you've chosen powerful lines to repeat. This poem was enjoyable to read out loud and I feel captures this sense of ominousness and despair, maybe hinting at the deconstruction of a traditional hero's narrative.

gauche criminal
>I like the play on 'smooth criminal' in the title. The humor in the exaggerative comparison is neat, and I love how it balances the more emotionally vulnerable last couple of lines, which run on the page (screen?), powered by social anxiety.

A strong start to NaPo!

@Liminality thank you!! always love seeing your interpretations :>

This poem was enjoyable to read out loud

excellent; that's what i was hoping for!

I like the play on 'smooth criminal' in the title.

hehe thank you xD

word list (see, sea, senile, siege, scenes, cedars, ceiling, cease) credit to one of my linguistic textbooks!

YOUR WORD PLAY FRIEND! UM Wow! I'm really impressed by the to/too/two poem very much so, (I have tried to do that with a read / read / red poem before and it ended up very silly and mostly non-sensical so I know it's hard to do!) and then I went on to read "undere" and this last poem and WOW again!

Very fun reads so far, but certainly not just poems for "gimmicks" - there's depth and interesting little introspective notes to uncover as well. Looking forward to reading more!

@alliyah thank you!!

Very fun reads so far, but certainly not just poems for "gimmicks" - there's depth and interesting little introspective notes to uncover as well.

ahh this means a lot to me :'D i love wordplay, but this year especially i wanted to make sure there's some meaning behind my poems and that they're not just stringing words together for the sounds. so thank you!!

had to rush before the day ended, so i personally think this isn't as strong of a poem oops, but i do appreciate keys =P

prompt credit to @Liminality!

prompts:
1) Write a poem about what you wish the Internet would be like.

2) Write an acrostic with the word 'CONNECTING'.

Woohoo! I love both 'keywatcher' and 'connecting'!

I really like the details you describe in 'keywatcher'. Even though I'm from a different discipline I feel some familiarity in a university/academic space, like doodles on the whiteboard that stay there for years and the boardgames being kept in the department. I like how you've linked the spaces as belonging to the same community even though they're in different buildings, through their positioning in the poem and through the idea that one person has all the keys to them.

As for 'connecting', each line brings a new element to the idea and I love it.

Transit is always a risk, living is a gamble, and planning is inevitably adapting

^I find these lines really moving! It feels like the turn in the poem where we see the 'imperfection' almost has a place in the world.

The last line gives me a sense of hope, too. Since the "living is a gamble" line the return to "connectivity" feels more metaphoric than the first few lines, as though not just the Internet, but living itself is "astounding". I'm so pleased with how you tackled the prompts, mint

ok I have the morally bankrupt job of helping construct physical data centers, so the lingo behind "connecting" is basically my daily life, and I love how you took this very technical concept of redundancy and made it into a hopeful idea about life. Great work! Your thread is always such a treat.