monkeys and bears and tears (oh my!)

What a shame-
I wasnt the daughter
Who would give you your perfect family.

What a shame-
All the time, wasted.
All the money spent.
All the tears you never wiped
And lessons i had to learn, without you.

What a shame-
I was never enough for perfect.
(You were never perfect enough for me to love)

What a
shame.

Of every person I have lost in my life,
I never figured I would be the easiest to forget.

I guess, there is no such thing as good and evil after all.
I am just a girl, trying to cope with pain.
And doing so made me responsible for the death of the one I loved the most.

I guess there are no heroes, only survivors.
And maybe that makes me the villain too.

I didn't find the real monster until it was too late.

Im the one who walks on the grass,
When there's not enough space on the sidewalk.

Because every piece of me is not enough for every piece of you and every part of who i am is not what you want me to be.

The only way to rationalize
The role i play,
Is to accept that i will never be seen as you.
And you will never be seen as
The kind of person i am.

i am unnamed, for every reason i am unwanted. I am unburdened only when you burden yourself. And i am unknown, unwillingly and unapologetically.

You are every girl i want to be. And every dream i am too scared to dream.

I can only see the sunset.

You see some part of me as broken
And so i guess thats who i became.
I walk in your footprints,
But i walk backwards.
I follow you
But i am blind,
Because you made me blind.
At least i can see the sunset
(but never the sunrise).

the melody of how I love you.
TW- err? romance? IDK if this really needs to be trigger warning-ed but it mentions kissing haha

Spoiler

Skin to skin,
I feel your heart beating against my chest.
Tick, tick, tick,
Beats the melody of how I love you.
You tell me things
That words cannot express.
And for the first time ever
I feel complete in a way i never felt empty.
Lips to lips,
I bite your tongue and
Tell you every secret i have never told.
Me to you,
I want to love you for every day
I breathe.

for every girl i was
Im just that girl who broke your heart
And now
Waits for you to kiss me again.
The girl who met you on my doorstep
And told you i loved you
When i didnt even love me.
And now i love you with every piece of who i am
And who i will ever be,
But you love me for every girl i was
And not for me.

I used to hate who you were to me.
I love you.

like a cloud that has finally blown in front of the sun, who never felt warmth until i felt you, and

I used to hate who you were to me.

but i think i am finally letting myself out of the cave i built and crossing the bridges i swore i would never cross. Because

You have finally changed.

into a woman i never thought you were capable of being. And i am still so scared every single day, but i am learning to trust that maybe

You love me too.

I am always the bad thing.

I realized that I am the
Bad thing that always happens to
Good people
(Except the people always happen to
Be narcissists)

Stick and stones
Could break my bones,
But you already broke every version
Of me.
Tears can be
Waterfalls,
But i already drowned in every version
Of who you have been.

Of every person I have lost in my life,
I never figured I would be the easiest to forget.
I guess, there is no such thing as good and evil after all.
I am just a girl, trying to cope with pain.
And doing so made me responsible
for the death of the one I loved the most.
I guess there are no heroes, only survivors.
And maybe that makes me the villain too.

When Words Fail

.-- .... . -. / .-- --- .-. -.. ... / ..-. .- .. .-..
.. / ..-. . . .-.. / - .... . / .-- .- -.-- / .. / .- .-.. .-- .- -.-- ... / .... .- ...- .
.. / .- -- / ... --- / ..- ... . -.. / - --- / .- .-.. --- -. .
- .... .- - / .. / -.. --- / -. --- - / -.- -. --- .-- / .-- .... .- - / .. - / ..-. . . .-.. ... / .-.. .. -.- .
- --- / -... . / .-.. .. -.- . -.. / ..-. --- .-. / -- .
.- -. -.. / --- -. .-.. -.-- / -- .

.- .-.. .-.. / .. / .-- .- -. - / .. ... / - --- / -... . / .-.. --- ...- . -..
..-. --- .-. . ...- . .-. / .- -. -.. / .- .-.. .-- .- -.-- ...
-... ..- - / .. / ..-. . .- .-. / .. / .-- .. .-.. .-.. / -. . ...- . .-. / .-.. .. ...- . / ..- .--. / - ---
-- -.-- / --- .-- -. / . -..- .--. . -.-. - .- - .. --- -. ...

.... --- .-- / -.. --- / .. / .-.. .. ...- .
.-- .... . -. / .-- --- .-. -.. ... / .- .-.. .-- .- -.-- ... / ..-. .- .. .-..

This is all I feel,
everything and always and
forever.
When words fail.

^^I totally messed A LOT of that up xD But I am going to keep it because the broken words is symbolic of the message I can trying to portray haha.

sdrawkcab si gnihtyreve esuaceB
sdrow nwo ym daer neve t'nac I nehW
gniog peek ot desoppus I ma woh tuB
gnissergorp dnA
gnivom yB
pu flesruoy mraw ylno nac uoY
redloc flesruoy ekaM
tnac uoy woh gnitseretni si tI
em rof reven dna uoy rof syawlA
sdrawkcab dnA
detsiwt sleef efil ym esuaceB
ti htiw od oT
gnihton tnaw I dna ereh ma I won dnA
edistuo dewolla eb ot yad yreve deyarp I
niar eht tlef reven sah niks ym tuB
gninihs tnsi nus eht nehw nevE
edistuo og ot gninrael ma I
siht etipseD
sdrawkcab sleef syawla efil yM