Tomhas seated himself beside Anneke, taking her hand in his. Anneke glanced at him, sighing and leaning into him ever so slightly.
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
"How are you feeling about it?" Zander asked Ky, though a glance at Anneke made him wonder if the question should also be directed towards her as well.
"Good!" Ky said quickly, smiling.
Zander raised an eyebrow. The answer had been entirely too quick, and entirely too cheerful. It sounded like she was trying to please him. Or trying to please Tomhas and Anneke. Or both.
She took a deep breath. Zander didn't believe her. She supposed she couldn't blame him. She was an anxious mess at the thought. She half-sounded like she was convincing herself when she insisted, "It will be good."
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
Tomhas's brow furrowed; Ky seemed far more upbeat than she'd been when he left. He glanced at Anneke, who gave him a tiny shrug.
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
Zander nodded. She still seemed anxious and unsure, but he believed that this was what she wanted. Whether it was because truly wanted it, or because she wanted to please them, was still unclear. But he believed that she wasn't upset by the decision either way, which was good to see. "I'll be tagging along for the journey!"
"Oh!" Ky grinned, this one a bit more genuine. She'd been actively forcing herself to be more upbeat around Zander -- she'd just worry him if he saw how badly she really felt about things. And she didn't want him to think she was upset about being in this family, because that wasn't it at all, and she didn't want to give that impression. But it was exhausting. And she was glad for something she could genuinely draw energy from. "That's great!"
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
Gods, what a whirlwind of emotion she was. Depressed one moment, near-giddy the next. Tomhas nearly couldn't keep track of it all! He watched her carefully, trying to figure out exactly what she was feeling right now. He was convinced this was an act.
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
Ky glanced at Tomhas and her grin faltered for the briefest moment as she had the realization that Tomhas knew much closer to what her actual mental state was, and probably could see straight through her. Was he going to call her bluff in front of Zander? Gods.
She forced her grin to return as she looked back at Zander.
He caught the hesitation, but he didn’t know what it meant. And she didn’t give him the opportunity to try to figure it out.
“We leave in three days,” she announced.
“I know,” he said with a smile.
“And I get to bring Petrir.”
Zander’s gaze snapped to her face, startled by hearing that name come from her mouth.
She blushed. “… my kitten.”
“…oh.” What an odd thing for her to name her cat. Wouldn’t that just draw up more painful memories every time she played with him? But, then, it was her father and her cat. She could do what she wanted. “That’s great, then!”
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
Tomhas noticed Zander's reaction to the cat's name; he'd nearly forgotten why the kitten was named Petrir. That must have stung for Zander, just now. Ky seemed--over it was a strong phrase--to have come to terms with her father's loss; was Zander surprised by that?
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
Ky also saw Zander's reaction, and suddenly felt very unsure of herself. As foolish as she'd felt when one of the boys made her explain the name in front of everyone at dinner. "...I didn't..."
She didn't have a defense. She hadn't expected to have to justify it to Zander.
Zander realized she was reacting to his reaction, and he shook it off, offering a grin instead. "I think it's a great name! Nostalgia, no doubt."
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
Tomhas winced inwardly; that was painful to witness. The poor girl shouldn't have to justify herself to Zander. She could name the cat what she liked, couldn't she?
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
Zander was uncomfortable that he'd made her uncomfortable, but he felt like if he kept trying to insist he thought it was a great name, then it would just make things worse. So he didn't. "Right, so, you, me, Petrir. What else are you bringing along?"
Ky hesitated, shrugging. She'd been progressively realizing that she'd never had to pack for herself before. She'd only brought along clothes when she traveled with Aleth. She didn't own anything else back then. Was she supposed to bring nonsense along with her? Or would that just make her look childish? "We need to bring Petrir's food. And his brush."
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
Ky hesitated, subconsciously fiddling with her pendant. She'd been wearing it almost nonstop since the attack. And she felt guilty for not wanting to also wear the necklace from the king -- but it was too expensive and made her anxious -- so she'd left it in the box from Papa, which she'd asked to have on the table next to her bed. It was childish. She knew it was childish. But it still oddly made her feel better to have him close to her.
"... I don't know what else," she said after a long pause.
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
(Harold going wayyyy overboard with gifts as usual)
"Any books you want to bring?" Tomhas prompted. "You've got a bunch of new stuff, right?"
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
"... am I supposed to bring those?" she asked sheepishly.
"u and rina are systematically watering down the grammar of yws" - Atticus "From the fish mother to the fish death god." - lehmanf "A fish stole my identity. I blame shady" - Omni [they/he]
"Only if you want to." Tomhas blinked; he'd thought she would want to at least bring the books Gaius brought her. He had read them once or twice and they were intriguing, especially since they were true accounts. Had the assassination attempt shaken her so badly that she'd lost interest in all of that?
"The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear. Remember that." -Karis Nemik
