xMidnightWriterx

Thanks for your review. I really appriciate it! =]. I get what you mean about it being amateurish and I think that might be because I haven't written for a ...

This is amazing. I have nothing negative to say about this so I'll skip to what I love. You keep the pace really well and it contains so much emotion. ...

Heya, this is much better. :D Still very speech based though, but you've added better personal thoughts. You also took what everyone said onboard and made the first chapter really ...

Yay, this was brilliant! Well done, you've really improved this and in such a short space of time as well. I'm very impressed! You kept all the good bits from ...

Thanks for your comment, Dakota. I've changed all the typos that you pointed out have taken in everything you said. I'm gunna alter it once I get some more critique ...