taimur

you start off really well...i liked the attention you paid to every detail in the first paragraph.....i will let you know some of the lines which were masterful and should ...

your first stanza is quite apparently describes the physical attributes of the subject...however, the third stanza and more specifically, the last three lines, do not amke any sense in the ...

well, the idea began well but it could have been further developed and emphasized....apart from the grammatical errors which were not serious in the first place, develop ur story line...sentences ...

apart from some of the mistakes you made with regards to grammar and syntax, i think the idea behind it is original...keep writing and always review your work twice....once read ...