paraperson

I love this so much!!! The feeling, the flow, how elegant it is while at the same time dark and a little morbid... I love it all!!! I'll admit that ...

Hiya there! This was a really interesting start. You've got great suspense going and I can already tell that Toni and Hayden are a cute couple despite their contrast. I ...

Hi there! Welcome to YWS! :) Now, I'm not a poem-writer, so I'm not going to pick at the mechanics. I just want to say that this poem is so ...

Hi there! First, I wanted to say that I really enjoyed this. I mean, it pretty much shows just how intimate an author's relationship with his/her characters have to be. ...

You've got something good going on here! I like it, but I think it could be improved. Try adding more detail, thoughts, and feelings, maybe even talk more about Ivo's ...

This was really good. Definitely short, but amazing. And I'm really, really curious about Ares's past... please bring it up soon! You end your chapters at all the right places, ...

This was simply beautiful. I know this isn't going to help you at all, but I think it's pretty perfect. I think I've fallen in love with those first four ...

I'm not exactly a nonfiction writer or reader, so my advice might not be the best out there, but I'll do my best! I definitely think you could build off ...

I love Ares! He's a great character and a very real character, which, of course, is always important. One thing I'd suggest (now I might sound a little hypocritical here, ...

Wow! That was deep and really short, which is a combination that I absolutely love. The writing is very simple while the meaning can be thought of in many different ...

This was unbelievably moving. It was, really! I mean, I was four years old when 9/11 happened, and I have almost no real emotional connection to that date, but I ...

That was a great ending! I totally did not expect it to end the way it did and really, I'd be delighted if you continued on from here because I ...

Whoa! You've got a a very intriguing plot going on! I think your story has a feeling that's slightly creepy which I love. You use a lot of description, which ...

Hello! I'm not really a short story writer, but I'll do my best to review this anyway as a reader. Overall, I think it's a really neat little piece with ...

Hey there! I've been reading and unable to stop since I started chapter one! The only issue I have is a few grammatical errors, but other than that I really ...