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ldbonita

  • Short Story » Horror, Supernatural Re: If the mirrors had eyes... Chapter 1

    Hey there, here's a review for you! :) So, the first paragraph is quite nice. It makes the reader curious about what the speaker just saw and so pulls the ...

    Nov 24, 2013
  • Poetry » General, General Re: Just Smile

    Hi there, here's another review for you! :) "A grin, a simple smile of joy" - I find these clauses to be contradictory. A grin suggests a more sinister feel ...

    Nov 24, 2013
  • Short Story » Dramatic, Romantic Re: A Love Story Gone Wrong

    Well-written, I liked it :) If you wanted the ending to be more open-ended maybe you could have ended it at the part where she gets all deep about her ...

    May 1, 2013
  • Short Story » Realistic, Narrative Re: Mangoes and Strawberries

    I quite enjoyed this, but there is a lot of editing you should do so that it be even better! :) The first sentence is my main problem here. Don't ...

    May 1, 2013


More than anything she wanted the world to be uncomplicated, for right and wrong to be as easily divided as the black and white sections of an Oreo. But the world was not a cookie.
— Roshani Chokshi, Aru Shah and the Tree of Wishes