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Thanks for the help so far, the tenses I don't see any problem, but if he had an example that would help better. As for the periods and commas for ...

Sounds more like Pop lyrics, but the tone would definitely seem to be a bard's song. I don't know of many bands in pop, but the old style is definitely ...

Thank you and btw, mods exist for full nudity without the armor on. The different part was the lack of bringing people into mog house, which is now going to ...

Its not a story, it lacks all the development and beauty of one, and cuts off at the end of the scene. :) Its a tiny piece I put up ...

Its better the your last chapter, that's for sure. I feel that you kinda mixed up the report and yes, godmodding characters are bit overpowered. Though i will keep reading ...

I knew I was horrible with commas, but yikes that is alot. I'll fix this up and edit it. I've already changed alot of the Pencharmer description because of the ...

Aww its sad ;-; Reminds me about the immortal cat story.

Yes they are. I thought that saying that they would be pulling the carriage is bit awkward and insulting to the reader as the only subject in the entire paragraph ...

Did I just start a trend of criticism for once? Going against a tide of good reviews and actually being recognized as having valid points is something new for me. ...

Horribly cliche and good at the same time. Interesting and unique, but at the same time...cliche! Hehe...dunno how to say that it is anything different (not bad), but just so ...