carbonCore

Catain touched two fingers to the nose of her large horse, pushing firmly. In response, Mistbreath whinnied softly and the girl allowed herself a smile. [Why "allowed"? Is there a ...

This is my first story on YWS, so be nice :P Haha. Here goes: Is this what death feels like? Kerenza had thought it happier, or more carefree. Rolling over ...

This is for the Magic Realism contest! I whistled slightly , looking out the mouth of the cave. A flicker of light came from there, but the area around me ...

Apologies for getting back to this so late. I wanted to re-review the edited version, to see now if it made more sense to me. As with my previous review, ...

I'll start off by saying that this is very well written in terms of quality of prose, and the characters are quite nicely developed. The first scene was interesting and ...

Goddamn. Every time I sit down to try and review one of these things, I just can't make myself say anything bad about them. This is weird because I usually ...

Great short story! You particularly excelled at creating your characters. I'm not positive whether the MC (I'll just call her that, since we don't find out her name) is bitter ...

Well, I've still got a lot of questions, but I'm going to back down for a while and judge this chapter on its own merits. If I turn off the ...

I'm so confuuuuuuused! You are giving us so much information and so many names, but it's all very fragmented. I can't wrap my mind around what's going on. It almost ...

This is a summary/synopsis of the previous chapters. [...] He finds an anomaly on a planet called Zeyaethay. He talks it over with his sister Crane and decides to check ...

Hmm. I thought this was going to be a fantasy novel, so when I read talk of multiverses, I was a little bit surprised. You should be careful with introducing ...

I won't do a full text review, as people had already picked the living daylights out of it, and instead just do a concise little thing. I'm not sure where ...

Yasmin slammed the dishwasher shut, shaking the pots and pans. "Money's on the table, give Connor his bottle at 7, blah blah blah." [Funny :D I think this miiiight work ...

It started with a baby. The daughter of Queen Amaria, queen of Paxtan and the most beautiful child in the kingdom. Her name was Rapunzel. On the day she was ...

Ivory held the end of the candle stick holder, gripping it with all her strength [I'd mention white knuckles instead of just saying "with all her strength". Think it's more ...