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I...wha?...i dont get it... but other than the really confusing text it was funny, and i loved the description of the room at the start, but if ure gonna make ...

i thought this was great , but there aer efew stuff you need to change; you wrote it in too much detail, ant your adjectives were too long and complicated ...

This , in a really kinda wierd way, reminded me of the mysticalness and magicel feeling i got when reading lord of the rings , but it wasent like coppy ...

This was by far better than hellstools, i could actually understand what was going on( exept at the the start with the flying horses, did he and the horse take ...

This was so wierd, but it wasent bad, it was like this really cool piece of work which you can relax while reading cuase there were no huge adjectives or ...

This was really good, im not saying this story is good or the way u used your style , im saying That your style is good, its clear and to ...

I loved it. It showed real depth, not just the usuall stuff, but one thing, lots of it was confusing and overdescribed, you used too many complicated words that just ...

I agree with Nate , the first part seemed plain , as though you were an estate agent describing a village to some buyers, but dont feel poo, after that ...

BAD. only kidding, heheheh. This was really well done , i loved the setting;The moon cast a faint light all over the grassy moor. The rider could see nothing through ...

ok, ill start with the bad stuff, it was too complicated and the descriptions were hard to make out, but it wasnt all bad, although i didnt understand the descriptions ...

By the time im twenty or forty or whatever, and have a job writing, and have been training for years, i would be pleased, even thrilled to be able to ...

this was great, i wanted to write somthing like this , somthing to show whats going on in the parts of the world that the news dosent cover. but when ...

Your description was extremely vivid , in one sence this was good but you should let your readers immaginations breath, let them build up some parts in there own mind+you ...

it wasnt chilling but it did have a creepy effect, it was deep and had many stong words but i think you should describe the suuroundings more cause i couldent ...

more....you must wtite more... . this was so welly done, the truthfullness of putting stuff like " it wont seem believable" made it believabe and the way you told it ...