artemis15sc

And we're back! “Miss?” the driver said drawing my eyes to the front seat. You need a comma after said. And good riddance, I thought, through my heart sank once ...

After I read this chapter I was clearer on who people were, though I still want to know more about how Maya fits into all this, and the other boy ...

So, I'm probably going to sound like a broken record, but once again I loved the tension. Your character had just been hit by a car, and the next chapter ...

Once again, your pacing and tension was amazing. I was pulled through the entire chapter, and that ending! it's good thing you've posted more already or I might kill something. ...

Hey, I owe you at least one more review, though I hope to review more! Anyway, I'll just jump right in. His eyelids felt heavy, a pleasant fatigue washing through ...

Hello, I'm actually finally returning a favor for a review you gave me. Anyway, I'm glad I picked this one up. I really liked how you hooked me with sentence ...

Hey, I finally made it around to a review. Like always, I loved the build-up in this chapter. You have mastered the art of creating tension in a way i ...

Hey, it's me. You are definitely a writing extraordinaire, but I did find a few things. First, nitpicks, how we love them: Where the more daring plants reach over to ...

Hey, first I loved the voice you took to describe this. The almost pseudo-exagerated ol english mixed with the DMV created a hilarious tone and contrast. I loved it. There ...

First, I love that you named this chapter after Pie, it's adorable. I'm going to jump in and give the nitpicks: Even during the afternoon the next day, they were ...

Hey, I'm here again! Once more, I felt like there was a little too much description and not enough action, so the pacing is still off. Also, we need dialogue ...

Your Narrator is the doctor! Just kidding, your narrator idea is original and cool, but I'm not sure how I feel about it. I'm not the biggest fan of breaking ...

Okay, So I know you have eleven reviews and anything I'll say will probably just be repeats, but I'll post it anyway just in case. Some nitpicks: There was venom ...

Hi. I'm going to start by saying I love the setting you've given this age-old story. It's seems almost Pirates of the carribean-esq, only darker, which I love. it gives ...

Hello, I'm returning the favor for your wonderful review. It truly is a amazing writing, and all I have are nitpicks, so that's awesome.. throughout the whole meeting so far ...