W0lfbane

Thanks Heather, I made those corrections and I'll look into how to make the story more "action-driven".

this was well thought out but i found some spelling mistakes "occordingly" is supposed to be spelled "accordingly". i was confused as too who left with Filch. you said the ...

Okay, let's have a look of what you have said: Hey W0lfbane, let's have a look at this (very!) short story! A story doesn't need to be long to interest ...

Thank you for your feedback Midnight, I made the corrections. Escape, as for your comment about: "I terms of Harry Potter relevance I feel it falls a little short, I ...

Not sure if everyone would just go and have some lunch elsewhere just like that, but the script is ok I guess.

Yeh I think it needs more characters, nothing wrong with no characters it just adds more personality to your story ^-^

Where does the wind blows? Everywhere! But that's a good poem you've written there =)

I think the word "You" is a little over-used but I suppose that's the style you've chosen... good job.

Let's paint a picture of you painting your nails... a picture tells a thousand words so a picture within a picture tells two thousand :P