Swires

Thank you surreal and Shafter.

Part 2, 3 and 4 of Rosins story have been added. General comments, indepth critiques, feedback on parts of the story are ALL welcome. I welcome any kind of review. ...

Oh, you learn something new every day. I didnt know the dual spelling of whiskey/whisky or about the speech marks. Ive just checked through books and you are right - ...

Surreal - I was a blurb, it says so in her description.

It was a nice story, I think all the corrections have been caught. This was powerful. One thing I would say is proofread your work, there were a few typos ...

What use is this? THis is a forum to review and work on Fantasy Fiction, not read blurbs. Write the thing first before posting please.

I agree with the others, but I think you should try not to space out your paragraphs. :wink: Fael57 :D Please offer constructive criticism. Paragraph spacing is essential for readability ...

This is not enough to critique, a paragraph is not a story. Consider writing at least 500 words before submitting something to YWS.

Thankyou for the critique, Ill correct and post the edited versions later. More critques are welcome.

Part 1, Rosin Has Been Added. -- Remember new readers you dont have to critique it all. If you don't fancy reading alot just read part 1 and give general ...

I took "Stupid Ass old man" to be a curse from the main character seeing as it is in thought formatting.

Yeah, the questions I asked were probably my intrigue into the story.

You will get more feedback if you put spaces in between your paragraphs.

I don't quite get the dots thing at this stage. That's probably ok though. As the story goes on, I'll get more information about it until I understand properly, right? ...

I think thats the one. I may have to read t some time.