Starleene

Hey Hey! So I really liked this story as a first draft. I felt the emotion is some places but in others it was noticable absent. Like here: “Will you ...

Whoa!! This was awesome! OK so this was dark, sexy, and mysterious!! Bring on the Heat!! Hahah. Anyway. I loved it! Yeah try to use a variation of words, otherwise ...

Okei-dokie! Lets get the ball rollin' here :) I thought I had died before you stood right in front. Huh? In front of where? Lucy? A class? U've came back ...

Hey Hey Hey! Starleene here! :) OK so lets get this party started: I really liked the suspense, it kept me reading and reading. Somethings to work on: I wanted ...

Whoa...I loved it. It was amazing how you drew the read in and introduce us to what is happening. I really did like this and I hope that you write ...

Hey Hey Hey! Starleene here. It seems to me that the previous posters have gotten everything, but I don't like being out done so I shall recap some little nit ...

Now this is my type of story! It caught my attention immedietly and didn't let me go until the end, where it flung me away with tears in my eyes! ...

I'm here!! Lets get this party started: You NEED to tell me everything. Watch the capitalization, all this needs is for you to italicize this. This weekend. I'll be gone ...

Hey Hey Starleene here to review! Get ready...Get set...Go! *Cool background music* The notebook kept in front of me was still empty. Maybe you could change this to something like ...

I think that all the obvious mistakes were pointed out by Finalfreedom. Yea I would really watch out for the "Then" and "Then", like Freedom said "Then" is a place ...

Whoa this totally blew me out of the water. Absolutely NOT. What part of the style of this haven't you guys grasped? That onrushing, headlong car-crash prose is the only ...

Hey Hey! I really love this story line, its fantastic, but...I do have some nit picks: “Hey you’re awake.” A familiar voice spoke. Ok if you just met someone and ...

Hallo! Im here to lets get to work :): I stood against the wall as Steven circled me Hmm I don't think that you could circle someone if their up ...

Haha this was very good...and bad at the same time :)I think its very funny when you say don't review and all these people review for you anyway :) haha ...

I really like to main character and the way she puts the princess types into categories, i think that this adds character to Carmen. I cant wait to find out ...