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Re: Pace - 1
Yay! I am so happy that you're writing this... especially this! It looks like it was ridiculously fun to write. :) First of all, I found a slight typo! When ...
May 18, 2011 -
Re: Parallel chapter 1
Okay, this is going to sound reeeeeeeeeeeeally nitpicky, but I am kind of a science nerd, so... well... yeah. :P The idea of a world having no gravity is rather ...
May 18, 2011 -
Re: Why Didn't You Listen?
Hey snickerdooly! :D So, this poem is a bit long, and I think you can really trim it down into something and make it a lot stronger as a result. ...
May 18, 2011 -
Re: We can, we can do this! (edited)
Haha, oh dear. How are you supposed to critique something like this? This is very, very, very dorky. And I kind of adore it for that! Just one thing: Buddy ...
May 17, 2011 -
Re: hate you fate
Hi sudharsan! :D This poem seems to exist only because of the rhyming. The problem is, it doesn't make sense. For instance, days go by with just sigh? What is ...
May 15, 2011 -
Re:
Hi Jace! :D So, I read your story and it's a bit interesting. I am unsure of why you used as many adjectives you did, or why you were particularly ...
May 15, 2011 -
Re: Honor's Gauntlet (1.1)
Woo! Yay! :D Its started off slow, so it was a bit tiresome, but then the dialogue started and it sped up quite nicely. I love their banter, and I ...
May 15, 2011 -
Re: Math Class Dreams
Haha! Yay, math class! :D I think you should totally describe the guy more and use all these mathematical innuendo to make it more interesting. So, maybe you can write ...
May 9, 2011 -
Re: Prologue
Yay! Your story had explosions in it. Every story should have an explosion in it! :D Anyway, you have this really exciting beginning! But, it still seems very unfinished and ...
May 8, 2011 -
Re: Fair-weather Friend
Hi again! Expect me to be annoying you quite a bit, lol. What can I say? Scholarships are awesome and I want you to winnnnn. Anyway, just a couple of ...
May 7, 2011 -
Re: Pain
XD This poem is not as long as the reviews I've been writing. O.o This made my day. :D Anyway! Your poem! What I noticed was that you would use ...
May 7, 2011 -
Re: she
Oy! I think the last line is something we can hope for all! When you wait for something that is nothing, it is a tragedy. :( I probably wouldn't capitalize ...
May 7, 2011 -
Re: An Unsent Letter
Hey Allie! :) I am going to treat this like romantic fiction because... well... it's in the romantic fiction forum, not the nonfiction forum! So woo! Anyway, a couple of ...
May 7, 2011 -
Re: The UnBible: The New Testament: The Book of Luke
Wait, there's more to this story? It's in the short fantasy fiction sections. Do you want me to move it for you? Anyway, a nitpick of sorts! I met her ...
May 7, 2011 -
Re: Assassin
Hey Etc! :D Is there any reason why this poem is red, besides the whole bloodiness of the poem? If there isn't any particular reason, or if it's just because ...
May 7, 2011
