Shion

Aaw... I miss my grandma... I liked how the narrator talks to the reader with calm security. It makes me feel at home when I read this... Nice done.

I liked how you described death in the most unusual scenarios and how easily it gets you once you're unguarded... The full impact hits at the last sentence when he ...

My gosh... I remember this scene in my memories quite vividly... I liked how you portrayed Erik quite innocently, and how the world used to be fine before the tipping ...

Ah... Childhood... It's quite cruel to think of it that way... But it is reality... I miss my childhood... Love your work by the way, quite touching...

I love how you described the whole simplicity of the scene... You really pictured it quite vividly...

That's quite short... It kind of feels there's more to it than there is... I liked how you pictured the paragraphs though, I just really wished I knew what was ...

I like how you portray that very short moment into something so memorable and meaningful in many ways. I'd like to see you write the whole story of it. It's ...