RoarShark

Wow rather interesting. I love the way that you introduced the whole concept of this dying world. The way you narrowed down you descriptions from broadness(the world in general) to ...

It took me a while to realize what exactly was going on. At first I thought you were referencing something from pop culture which I did not understand. By the ...

Not bad, incredibly intriguing. I can see why this was picked up by an agent. Your style shines thru, as was mentioned earlier the questions given to the reader help ...

Just a small gripe. The formatting is wrong. Its very wrong. First off dialogue should look like this CHARACTER What they are saying Its hard to get it centered here ...

Wow, very powerful and very emotional. Just by reading the first paragraph I can see you have a knack for writing. I don't think there are any grammar mistakes. None ...

Looks really good. So long as it serves the purpose it was designed for, its good. The only thing I am curious about is the top and bottom, as they ...

That was great. It quickly drew the reader in giving them reason to feel for the narrator. It has great mystery, and I really want to know what else is ...

This post is in response to you needing an antagonist. First off you don't really need an antagonist per-say. You need a conflict that has your protagonist pitted against something ...

I'm really confused after reading this. Is the character Poseidon related to god in any other way than the name? I looked like you were trying to make him the ...

I'm very curious as to how this ties into your Novella. This was artfully written, and was great. It was very eerie and left me wondering what was going on ...

What an interesting concept. I loved it. The narrator has a strong voice and very strong characteristics that shone threw in your writing. The first bit of dialogue was a ...

Quite interesting, I can't wait to see what happens next. You developed the main character really well. The only major thing I noticed was a in the third paragraph for ...

This sound like it could be interesting. I really need to read some of the story part to really be able to tell you how interesting it is. As for ...

I really really enjoyed reading this. I also really want to read more. It kept me hanging until the very end, and even then left me hanging. So I suggest ...

I must say, that was incredibly engaging, and well written. The descriptions were vibrant and great, I could picture everything perfectly. I can also see many people relating to David's ...