-
Re: Winston Tousdale
Hi, this is Nephthys, excited to review a script! You seem to have a great understanding of the balance between stage directions and dialogue that works well onstage- you give ...
Aug 5, 2013 -
Re: Stay Tuned
Yay! A script! :) Before I start of the review: I'm sure that you've been told this before, but generally it is better not to direct your own work, since ...
Mar 15, 2011 -
Re: Saving Aleogra -Intruders!- Chapter 3
I'm back! I'm very glad that my last review was helpful :) “Oh,” Ivy said innocently , skipping to open the door. The combination of "said" and an adverb sometimes ...
Mar 10, 2011 -
Re: deleted
Hello, I'm Nephthys, and I will be reviewing your lovely story today! :) The silhouetted shape was the only thing moving in the calm of the night. It crouched low ...
Mar 9, 2011 -
Re: Snap Chapter 1
The pale yellow rays of the moon illuminate my skin as I sit upon the wall near my home. Lovely first sentence, except what kind of wall? Without any description ...
Mar 9, 2011 -
Re: Realms & Adventures of the Ancient's Court Chapter 2
Hi, I'm Nephthys, and I will be reviewing your lovely story today! :) The sun began to rise on an island in the middle of the Janenia Sea. The island ...
Mar 8, 2011 -
Re: Saving Aleogra -The Trouble Inside- Chapter 2
Hello, I'm Nephthys and I am here to review your lovely story. :) Delanie groaned as she felt herself being shaken from her sleep. First of all, I can't help ...
Mar 8, 2011 -
Re: Eternity: Part One
Hi, I'm Nephthys, and I am very excited to review your script today :) First of all, I would suggest leaving details such as "dully lit" (is that even a ...
Mar 5, 2011 -
Re: Actors (scenes 1-10)
INT. TOWN HALL - STAGE WINGS - NIGHT Thursday 16th December, 2010. Presentation night. ON SCREEN TITLE: Thursday, December 16th 2010 WOW. A screenplay about theatre that takes place on ...
Jan 30, 2011 -
Re: Worlds of Serendipity (prologue)
Since you gave me such awesome reviews, I though I should attempt to return the favour, although I doubt my review will be nearly as awesome as yours ;) She ...
Nov 30, 2010 -
Re: Any good books I can try?
I'll give one more suggestion about a great author, not an individual book. That author is Neil Gaiman. The guy's a genius most of the time. He wrote Coraline and ...
Nov 29, 2010 -
Re: The Robot Project (1.2)
Hi, I'm Nephthys, and I will be your reviewer today :) A glitch in the company’s long running perfection . Awkward. Perfect record maybe? They ignored me; they treated me ...
Nov 28, 2010 -
Re: Arms Of Death [Prologue]
Hi, I'm Nephthys, and I will be reviewing your lovely prologue :) They say that in the end your life flashes before your eyes. Unfortunately, I've heard this opening line ...
Nov 28, 2010 -
Re: Misunderstood Act 1 Scene 1
Hello, I'm Nephthys, and I will be your reviewer today :) Personally, I was thinking of getting rid of the narrator. He seems unnessesarry. Do you agree with me? I ...
Nov 28, 2010 -
Re: a screenplay. about wife,baby, husband and deep issues
Hello, I am Nephthys and I will be reviewing your screenplay today. :) Kirk is a twenty one year old military soldier in a modern war happening overseas. His wife, ...
Nov 28, 2010
