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Re: Keychain Magic Prologue Revision
Thank you, Shooting Stars! This was very good advice. I'll update it immediately!
Mar 2, 2012 -
Re: Complete & Improved Prologue Keychain Magic
Updating in progress!
Feb 25, 2012 -
Re: The End
Very well done. My favorite verse is 1. Really helps with images. It'd sound really great in song form. Do you have music written for it?
Feb 20, 2012 -
Re: Complete & Improved Prologue Keychain Magic
Thank you! I was wondering what that was :D
Feb 20, 2012 -
Re: Please Critique This. Updated work. Started over from scratch.
Thank you... I did spend a lot of time on this. I guess I could use some more description. I'm glad you find the plot lively enough. I struggled with ...
Feb 18, 2012 -
Re: free
Good story and you intregated the emotion in it well, however you use your character's name A LOT. You should use it sometimes, but not too much. That way, it ...
Feb 9, 2012 -
Re: Doubts About Forever
I love your poem. A lot of people can relate to not being able to trust "forever." You're language is extremely good. It's simple but descriptive, and satisfying to the ...
Feb 9, 2012 -
Re: The Silence
Just read the first two chunks. Sounds good. You captured your character very well. Is this genre steampunk? That would be pretty cool. I'm just wondering because the language style ...
Feb 5, 2012 -
Re: The Difference Later
Woah. And I say that because... THIS IS POWERFUL! Society molds children into adults in a really nasty way sometimes, and this, in all its simplicity, is a wonderful way ...
Feb 5, 2012 -
Re: Paragon, Chp 1
By the way, if there's any specific feedback you're looking for, feel free to message me! I'd love to chat about writing.
Jan 27, 2012